[INFJ] Get along with ESFJs?

Get along with ESFJs?

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This is a discussion on Get along with ESFJs? within the INFJ Forum - The Protectors forums, part of the NF's Temperament Forum- The Dreamers category; Statistically INFJ is the rarest type, and ESFJ is the most common, so you should know some. Do you normally ...

  1. #1
    ENFJ - The Givers

    Get along with ESFJs?

    Statistically INFJ is the rarest type, and ESFJ is the most common, so you should know some.

    Do you normally get along with them easily, or have to make a lot of effort to tolerate us, or something?

    Just wondering what kind of relationships you have with them.



  2. #2
    INFJ - The Protectors

    One of my best friend is an esfj! He doesn't seem to care too much about the deeper things I tend to think about but we get along beautifully
    chickpeaax thanked this post.

  3. #3
    ENFJ - The Givers

    Quote Originally Posted by bubbleboy View Post
    One of my best friend is an esfj! He doesn't seem to care too much about the deeper things I tend to think about but we get along beautifully
    That's awesome.
    I don't know if I'm completely different from your ESFJ, but I always pretend not to care about deeper things, because I feel so horribly awkward talking about them. It's easier to act like I don't care, but I really do, just silently. Because talking about deep things is very, very uncomfortable.
    But, the ESFJ you know could just not care about them, I don't know.
    bubbleboy thanked this post.

  4. #4
    INFJ - The Protectors

    I see the awkwardness in him too. I find myself having a one-sided conversation most of the time, which I really don't mind! I'm shy but around my friends I never seem to shut up =)
    beast in peace and chickpeaax thanked this post.

  5. #5
    ENFJ - The Givers

    Quote Originally Posted by bubbleboy View Post
    I see the awkwardness in him too. I find myself having a one-sided conversation most of the time, which I really don't mind! I'm shy but around my friends I never seem to shut up =)
    That's what the INFJ I know is like, too! Everyone's always suprised when they see me and her talking like nutters when we're both usually so quiet. For some reason people are really shocked.

  6. #6
    INFJ - The Protectors

    You know, I'm not sure if I actually know any ESFJs...

    But I definitely get along with the warm, nurturing types. :)
    chickpeaax thanked this post.

  7. #7
    INFJ - The Protectors

    My best friend is an ESFJ and she's my favorite person to be around. I don't think she enjoys talking about "deep things" either but she does keep up because she knows how interesting I find them. She has a very simple nice love that I don't see in a lot of people, never spiteful. She is just happy in a simple way it's amazing (:
    chickpeaax thanked this post.

  8. #8
    INFJ - The Protectors

    My mom, older sister and all three of my sister-in-laws are ESFJ's. Where do I begin? Well all save my sister they seem to hold no reservations about backstabbing someone if it seems right at the time (in their eyes). My sister can be frustrating at times too but in the way that she misunderstands things but she is generally a very bubbly, sweet person. Things are better between my mom and I now but before they were terrible. My mom is also sweet when she's not being a monkey head. As for the three sister-in-laws...don't think I'm ever trusting them again. It kind of made me question the things I liked about them and made me not like those things so much because maybe it's all fake. I really need to meet some better ESFJ's because I'm so jaded when it comes to them lol.
    chickpeaax thanked this post.

  9. #9
    INFJ - The Protectors

    If they are a pretty flexible and accepting ESFJ I get along with them better in the long-term than the average ESFJ, I suppose is the best way to say it.

    For instance, I have now lived with 3 ESFJs. The one that I get along with best and the one that I am living with now. She certainly has the same ESFJ tendencies and traits as the others but she is just a bit more laidback and willing to do a spontaneous moment or whatever once in a while.

    Its the ones that are just REALLY gossipy, dramatic, controlling, unconforming, etc. that I have problems over time.

    Though I will say that several of them I initially get sucked in to be friends with them because of their welcoming Fe.
    Btmangan, chickpeaax and Vivid Melody thanked this post.

  10. #10
    INFJ - The Protectors

    My boss is an ESFJ and I do like certain qualities about her such as she is very punctual and always does what she says she will do. However, her negative trait is that she seems to always take others helpful advice as personal criticism. I think it has to do with her dominant FE. I just wish she could remove herself from the equation and see that the advice has nothing to do with her.
    chickpeaax thanked this post.


 
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