Why I Would Never Date Based on MBTI - Page 13

Why I Would Never Date Based on MBTI

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This is a discussion on Why I Would Never Date Based on MBTI within the Articles forums, part of the Announcements category; @ Oluwadan Take the K,W,M,L Quiz and do some studying up on the archetypes....

  1. #121

    @Oluwadan Take the K,W,M,L Quiz and do some studying up on the archetypes.

  2. #122

    What KWML quiz?

  3. #123

    Thank-you John...located it

    KWML Personality Test

    Warrior
    John Oge thanked this post.

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  5. #124

    Quote Originally Posted by Ancient View Post
    Sounds to me like the person who invented that compatibility between two radically different types thought the same thing that everyone else thinks: Opposites Attract, One Balances Out The Other... again, it takes two self-aware individuals to make a relationship work, not science. Science is the "Approach" -- and in some cases, it can help solve a problem in a relationship -- but the relationship itself requires love, commitment, compassion... I could go on.
    I agree with you that a relationship is not easy. I am speaking about temperament, do you have the temperament of a king, warrior, magician, or lover. Temperament and personality are separate things as you probably know, if you've got king energy you'll be most attracted to and best suited for a person with magician energy and so on. This is science, psychology of the individual and archetypes within us, not the study of relationships.
    Oluwadan thanked this post.

  6. #125

    Yes I think Jung had a lot to say on 'transcendance'. I know many people who use various systems to consider compatibility and lose endless opportunity for development in the self and other. Yes I believe the most important factor in an successful relational transaction is motivation for something productive, followed closely by compassion and patience. No necessarily in that order.

    "Love is patient and kind; love does not envy or boast; it is not arrogant or rude. It does not insist on its own way; it is not irritable or resentful;it does not rejoice at wrongdoing, but rejoices with the truth. Love bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things."
    Jamie.Ether and Love Wins thanked this post.

  7. #126

    Quote Originally Posted by John Oge View Post
    I agree with you that a relationship is not easy. I am speaking about temperament, do you have the temperament of a king, warrior, magician, or lover. Temperament and personality are separate things as you probably know, if you've got king energy you'll be most attracted to and best suited for a person with magician energy and so on. This is science, psychology of the individual and archetypes within us, not the study of relationships.
    I am kind of confused. I tried looking those archetypes up. Aren't they guys' archetypes?

  8. #127

    Quote Originally Posted by Love Wins View Post
    I am kind of confused. I tried looking those archetypes up. Aren't they guys' archetypes?
    No it's pretty universal. King/Queen

  9. #128

    Quote Originally Posted by John Oge View Post
    No it's pretty universal. King/Queen
    Do you have a link?

  10. #129

    I agree with you. MBTI is a tool in a set of many tools you can use to get the job done. Its just one measure of many. There are a mixture of things to consider when dating, sexual attraction is one of the key things that must be there. It gets you hooked and then similar values and compatibility kick in to help your relationship endure past the chemical love high. Some people don't realize their relationship was hanging on because of a love high that finally waned. There are hang-ups and flaws from both people that make it even more complex, you got to prioritize which is most important and what you can live with. As strange as it may seem, there are people where sexually attraction is low priority and prefer low to no sex, for some getting the feeling of being protected and nurtured take priority instead.
    Oluwadan thanked this post.

  11. #130

    Quote Originally Posted by kudi View Post
    I agree with you. MBTI is a tool in a set of many tools you can use to get the job done. Its just one measure of many. There are a mixture of things to consider when dating, sexual attraction is one of the key things that must be there. It gets you hooked and then similar values and compatibility kick in to help your relationship endure past the chemical love high. Some people don't realize their relationship was hanging on because of a love high that finally waned. There are hang-ups and flaws from both people that make it even more complex, you got to prioritize which is most important and what you can live with. As strange as it may seem, there are people where sexually attraction is low priority and prefer low to no sex, for some getting the feeling of being protected and nurtured take priority instead.
    The feeling of being protected gives me the sexual attraction, which is very important. But there is a lot more to it.

    I'm so glad I looked beyond MBTI to find my latest guy. I focused more on how he treats me and our shared values. But mostly my decision was based on a "vibe" I picked up from him on our first date. He tells me the same.

    We had talked on the phone for a while before our first date. On our date, I noticed how easy it was to be with him. We both didn't want the night to end. I also noticed how good I felt about myself while with him. I didn't feel as if I had to hide parts of myself. He was very receptive to my stories and my humor. And he had me spitting out food in laughter when he shared his stories.

    I didn't focus on MBTI or even try to figure out his type (my guess would have been way off because he is so attentive). Instead, I focused on the here and now and because I did, I think I may have found the man of my dreams. No kidding.

    However, when complications hit, I know I can use MBTI as another resource to help me understand him and more importantly- to understand myself better.

    My guy is ISTJ btw. There is not much support for me to be with ISTJ MBTI theory-wise or even forum wise. Too much negativity has been said about ENFP/ISTJ combo or any other kind of combo. So this reinforces the idea that sometimes it's good to just shut out the outer noise and to instead just focus on the heart.

    Bottom line is: I like who l like, his MBTI is part of him and I will work with it after the fact. It shouldn't be apart of my choice to date him.
    Tucken, Humilis Curator, Jawz and 3 others thanked this post.


     
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