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  1. Blindspots's Avatar
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    XD I found your banter about genes amusing. It reminds me of whenever I'm together with my parents. "You really took after me, kiddo." "That's not what everyone at reunions says." "Which reunions, your side or mine?" "Then again, we rarely go to reunions." And it goes on.

    Regards to them :)
  2. Blindspots's Avatar
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    Although I'm commenting on this quite long after you wrote your post, I really appreciate your personal review of this book :D I hope you didn't feel imposed upon, though, when I expressed interest in the book ._.;;;

    It's interesting how you chose to post about the community aspect of this book. Being around people isn't that comes to mind when I think about wabi sabi, people tending to be loud and energized when together, and wabi sabi tending to be quiet and subdued. I think I see how furyu comes into the picture, then: being unusual from a crowd, though that unusualness still from being influenced by others' unusualness, so artists aren't as isolated by each of their uniquenesses as it seems.

    Then about the writers banding together but still encouraging each other to develop their own writing, I got reminded of something by Rilke about true companionship being about protecting each other's solitudes, allowing the individuals room to grow. Maybe artists across different cultures aren't too different after all.

    And then the part of observing while participating in the next post. While the writer cited non-Japanese writers this time, I'm (indirectly) reminded of ichigo-ichie, that each event happens only once in a lifetime, and should be cherished as you live through it. Full participation will then lead to fuller insight for your work.

    I wonder if the "conversations" with Basho were effective in the book. Hard to say without having read it completely.


    Again, thank you for posting about the book ^^
  3. Reluctanine's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Mr.
    Don't worry too much about dating. The guy was probably scared as hell to ask for your number and now that he has it, he hasn't got a clue on what to do. Or he has a best friend who tells him, "no man, you got to wait at least like five days. Otherwise she'll think you're a wimp. Bla bla bla"

    It's out of your hands, just wait for whatever might happen while not losing any sleep over it. ;)
    OHHHHH that makes sense. Guys are so weird. Lol. Five days? Okay, let's see if you're right. I'm just assuming he's busy with work at the moment. I know I'm super lucky to be able to set my own hours.

    As for the writing; that's not out of your hands. I mean, I shouldn't say much as I write countless of drafts of everything (this reply would be four pages if I had a little less self-control), but rarely manage to work at something till the point where I consider it finished.

    Even though this job might not allow you to be as creative as you'd want to be, it could be good for other reasons. You'll probably have to write under a bit of pressure. You'll probably have to be fairly consistent with your output. You'll have to rework things once or twice or until the head of the project is happy with it. So, it might not feel as attractive, but consider the positives.
    I'm used to all those things. I've actually dealt with that with my publisher. And I set a quota I have to meet daily for my writing and editing. I usually do up to ten edits before publishing anything.

    The creativity part that I'm worried about is that my ideas are being sold for cheap. If I'm writing for a mobile gaming app, it's going to disappear in a few months, years if I'm lucky. When I write under my name, I get royalties in perpetuity and my ideas will never die with a server shut down.

    Option two: it's shit. If it's bad, you could try and adapt. Make yourself into a more flexible writer. Create a routine for your writing and develop treats and perspectives you would have never had on your own. There's always things to be learned! You can always stop if you really hate it and feel liberated to work on your own things again.
    I already have a routine in place. I'm more worried that this will take up too much time and not be as beneficial for me as working on my own things, in the long run.

    My books have been picking up lately, so if I take on this job, it will push back the dates of future publications. I want to have more readers, not lose them because of long releases.

    I have to admit that I will probably learn some things though. Thank you for your advice. I will weigh things carefully before I make a decision.
  4. Mr.'s Avatar
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    Don't worry too much about dating. The guy was probably scared as hell to ask for your number and now that he has it, he hasn't got a clue on what to do. Or he has a best friend who tells him, "no man, you got to wait at least like five days. Otherwise she'll think you're a wimp. Bla bla bla"

    It's out of your hands, just wait for whatever might happen while not losing any sleep over it. ;)

    As for the writing; that's not out of your hands. I mean, I shouldn't say much as I write countless of drafts of everything (this reply would be four pages if I had a little less self-control), but rarely manage to work at something till the point where I consider it finished.

    Even though this job might not allow you to be as creative as you'd want to be, it could be good for other reasons. You'll probably have to write under a bit of pressure. You'll probably have to be fairly consistent with your output. You'll have to rework things once or twice or until the head of the project is happy with it. So, it might not feel as attractive, but consider the positives.

    Option one: you actually enjoy it. Do it for as long as you enjoy it and then a bit more. If you really don't like it anymore, you could always leave.

    Option two: it's shit. If it's bad, you could try and adapt. Make yourself into a more flexible writer. Create a routine for your writing and develop treats and perspectives you would have never had on your own. There's always things to be learned! You can always stop if you really hate it and feel liberated to work on your own things again.

    Option three: don't try it. But then you'll never find out what it would have been like. :)

    Variety is the spice of life ;)
  5. Reluctanine's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Hitofuri
    Hi there! Can't help but be intrigued by the wabi-sabi book you have ^^
    Oh cool! Okay, I will be sure to do a more in-depth review of it once I've read it. :D Yeah, the title drew me in too, lol.
  6. Blindspots's Avatar
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    Hi there! Can't help but be intrigued by the wabi-sabi book you have ^^
  7. Reluctanine's Avatar
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    I read both fiction and non-fiction. I find them both interesting, since there's usually truth in fiction and there's also falsehoods in non-fiction that I have to be aware of. Stories are a means of information transmission that makes the truth memorable. The lessons they teach have more to do with a study on humans and humanity than concrete facts though. At least, this is what I think about books.

    Do you have a book on history to recommend?
  8. Vahyavishdapaya's Avatar
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    I don't know, I'm pretty much always reading something. I like non-fiction for the most part. Philosophy and history and academic sorts of things. I find fiction pretty dull because the truth is so much weirder and more fantastic than stories could ever be. What about you?
  9. Reluctanine's Avatar
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    @Big Daddy Kane

    Then the question becomes how many hours do you read a day, and what do you like to read.
  10. Vahyavishdapaya's Avatar
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    I like to read. :shrugs:
  11. Reluctanine's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Macrosapien
    You're okay with your mom doing that? You guys must be really close.
    I'm fine with it. We are close. :D

    I mean whether it's through online dating, events, friends, or just through random chance by being approached on the street, it's all the same end of meeting someone compatible with me. It doesn't hurt to expand my options and cast a wider net.

    Ultimately, I and the man will get the final say whether we like each other and whether we think we will have a future together.

    I might trust someone recommended by my relatives or friends more because they've been vetted by them. Random approaches are a bit more dubious because I don't know if they're telling the truth about themselves.

    I don't mind having my mum push me about it because I would like to find someone too but I've just been a bit preoccupied with other things to really pay a lot of attention to it. I am also a bit hesitant about how to approach the whole dating thing.
  12. Macrosapien's Avatar
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    You're okay with your mom doing that? You guys must be really close.
  13. Reluctanine's Avatar
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    Also, yes, given the vastness of space and infinite time, I believe that the statistical probability of us encountering aliens or aliens invading us is just a question of when. We will need stronger and smarter humans if we do fight them. Hopefully it will be a peaceful encounter but throughout history when two cultures clash there's always bloodshed first before there is peace. Then a majority and minority is established.

    Coincidentally our capitalistic system is perfect for breeding stronger and smarter humans. If a man is not tall enough, he must be rich enough to prove his mating potential by being smart enough to earn. If a woman is not beautiful and thus healthy and strong enough, she must be smart enough with words to charm or artistic enough with makeup to showcase herself in a better light.

    Our human race is very much an arm's race for the strongest and smartest which is great because while we have not moved to a purely digital form we will need this. And in order to get to a digital form, we will have to be smart enough to innovate and strong enough to survive armed conflict since we love killing each other so much.
  14. Reluctanine's Avatar
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    @Elistra

    Yup, I've mentioned not feeling safe multiple times in other posts that I think I must have forgot to write it here or got bored with saying it again. Lol this is more like a stream of thought blog post than a real argument.

    I think anything I do here wouldn't impact me as much as people coming after me lol. Tall men and tall women are always in high demand. I don't see rich guys with short women. Most of the times in pictures they're tall or even taller than the guy! What is a rare sign of health is always the most prized. Though yes I think it would be cool if the human race were taller in case we ever get invaded by aliens and need the men and women to fight.

    Wow, really? There might be underlying medical problems with mid 5 foot? I've never heard of that!!!

    Yeah for me a guy of the same height, which is the average for Caucasians, is good enough. Taller is better since he can intimidate other guys off since I really do plan to travel everywhere.

    I also have to say that being Caucasian means we won't get bullied so easily in certain countries. The downside to being Caucasian and traveling is that shopkeepers will try to earn a lot more off you because of currency strength so it will be almost impossible to bargain in shops. So what we could do is he could wait off to the side while I go in and bargain lol. Shopkeepers usually are a bit more indulgent to a girl. :P

    Another reason why I would like someone other than from my country is because I know Chinese already and I'm slowly picking up other local languages. If I get together with a local guy we're effectively sharing the same strengths in terms of cultural understanding, language, and worldview. I want to understand more about the world so it stands to reason that someone with a completely different background from me will be able to teach me more. He might also notice and focus on things that are not in my range at all. I'm sure there will be an adjustment period where I have to get used to his accent and also his way of thinking and he has to get used to mine as well so ideally we will share quite a few interests or values or goals in common to act as a gel. I think those are the important things for a relationship to work.

    Hmmmm now that you mentioned it, having a strained neck from kissing a much shorter or taller guy isn't very good for health. I wonder if I should have an upper bound for guys?
  15. Elistra's Avatar
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    And this is the crux of it? It's not that shorter ones automatically earn less money per se (also, you can't say Zuckerburg suffered from malnutrition growing up due to his era) but shorter ones make you feel less safe...?

    And a bit of self-interest too, re: making the overall mating pool more congenial to your preferences and interests, i.e. the idea that there needs to be more very tall men out there. ;)

    Honestly? I prefer men to be at least as tall as I am. Not because the shorter ones can't earn or fight, but because I'm only 5'6", and if a man isn't at least in the mid 5' range, there are greater chances of there being some kind of underlying medical problem. That, and ... ok, this is not-tact and probably TMI to boot, but I do not generally find men shorter than myself to be sexually attractive, because I prefer to be the comparatively weaker/more fragile one in the bedroom. *coughs*
  16. Reluctanine's Avatar
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    @Elistra

    Same height as Warren Buffett and Bill Gates so hopefully that bodes well. :D
  17. Elistra's Avatar
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    How tall are you, out of curiosity?
  18. Reluctanine's Avatar
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    @Elistra I think for historical figures in the past, their height back then would be considered tall for a man.

    I would feel a little bit guilty about getting with a short guy just because he's super rich if I don't feel safe around him because of his height. Walking down a dark street at night with a shorter guy won't make me feel secure. :/
  19. Elistra's Avatar
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    Statistically, tall people tend to have slightly higher positions and/or earn a bit more, but...

    Napoleon Bonaparte = 5 feet, 6 inches.
    Erwin Rommel = 5 feet, 6 inches.
    Benjamin Franklin = 5 feet, 9 inches.
    John Adams = 5 feet, 7 inches.
    Ross Perot = 5 feet, 5 inches.
    Mark Zuckerberg = 5 feet, 7.5 inches.
    Warren Buffett = 5 feet, 10 inches.
    Bill Gates = 5 feet, 10 inches.

    ... even for a man, not being over six feet tall is definitely not a dealbreaker in these things. :)
    Updated 01-16-2016 at 10:19 PM by Elistra
  20. Reluctanine's Avatar
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    Yeah. I get that they love me but sometimes what they think is best for me is what I disagree with. I think the future is very different from what we'll all be used to now.

    Thank you for such a long reply! :D I have to say that I never considered it would be harder for a grown man to bridge the communication gap but that's true! I'm not too sure what to talk to him sometimes too.

    What should I save it as then? Why would protecting with a password means I lose all my work?
    Updated 01-09-2016 at 05:25 AM by Reluctanine
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