[ENFJ] As an ENFJ, which personality type do YOU think is the best for you?

As an ENFJ, which personality type do YOU think is the best for you?

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This is a discussion on As an ENFJ, which personality type do YOU think is the best for you? within the ENFJ Forum - The Givers forums, part of the NF's Temperament Forum- The Dreamers category; And why? I find that although we can read what the experts say and assume some types are more likely ...

  1. #1
    Unknown

    As an ENFJ, which personality type do YOU think is the best for you?

    And why?

    I find that although we can read what the experts say and assume some types are more likely to fit for us(Like an INFP for example). We as individuals find some character traits in our partner to be what we need in a relationship,
    I know several ENFJ's who go for the ISTJ and INTJ personality type as they find them to be very straight forward,
    Whilst many others go for the INFP for the emotional closeness.
    And so on and so forth.

    I personally haven't had a type that has solely attracted me(In honesty I never really felt that much attraction to anyone before now),
    But I always felt IxTx's could be a great match for me,
    Or they went for me,
    I liked the introversion to balance out my extroversion,
    And the thinking function to balance out my emotions!

    But having said that recently I've fallen for an INFJ(To the extent I think this INFJ is "The One"),
    And found that for me an INFJ is perfect,
    Or more this specific one is haha

    But thats a story for another time!
    So what types have you dated?
    Was there common reason for this?

    And what are your opinions on the predisposed selection of a "Best type" for you,
    I personally think it's a unique bond,
    That happens between two people,
    And that personality types does not play an active role,
    It merely makes it easier to find out where you two lie in communication!

    Last question,
    If you have found someone to be the person you'd like to spend your life with,
    What type are they?
    And what makes them special or different?
    I'll share what I think later on the thread :)
    Helios and Antipode thanked this post.



  2. #2

    INTJ and INFP for now, although that's subject to change. The relationship I've had with the INTJ I know has gone on for going on five years. We aren't officially dating and we have had some problems.

    The last time we officially dated I had feelings for an INFP and felt he could fulfill something that I was lacking with the INTJ and I started to feel guilty about having feelings for this other guy, so we broke up. The INFP has his shit together and the INTJ doesn't at this point in time, so I think that's part of it.

    But for the INTJ, the things I like.... I truly do love him and miss him, and feel that he understands me, the deeper me more than anyone in the entire world. He knows me inside and out. I feel like we have our own world that only we understand....we have similar values, and the same sense of humor, and he is deeply in touch with his feeling side.

    I'm basically tearing up writing this. I don't know what else to say. He is my best friend, but sometimes I wonder if I need to give him space to grow. I worry that I'm bringing him down. I've experienced other relationships and I do feel what him and I have is rare.

    I just wanted to add, the more I think about it, the more I feel like Ni is an important function for me to have in common with someone. I tend to feel I can create the deepest bonds with XNXJs and ISXPs.

    Still, I wouldn't limit myself. It's just with types without Ni, I sometimes feel like there is a thin layer of saran wrap over the relationship. While they can still be awesome relationships/friendships in many ways, I think I may find it difficult to communicate my true self to a partner in a romantic relationship without a common way of viewing the world.

  3. #3
    ENFJ - The Givers

    An INxx for me personally. Simply because any relationship to me is a meeting of both intellect and feeling. And I believe that in a relationship helping each other to develop is very important, to me. Also I'm a Scientist and an Art and Literature enthusiast :) And those that tend to be well versed in these tend to be INxx :)
    Devrim thanked this post.

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  5. #4
    ENFJ - The Givers

    As an ENFJ, I think this question has been overly asked ever so periodically. Regardless, thanks for asking and here's my 2 cents... even though it sounds kinda similar to what most ENFJs might reply.

    Firstly, any NF, in any particular order, depends on the individual actually.

    INFP - probably the most popular combination and for many reasons, I believe there are many traits that complement each other. Sure, there's a lot of putting up and work required for this relationship in order to really last. Kinda like the perfect relationship in paper or theoretically speaking.

    INFJ - the whole Ni bubble thing going on and very strong and deep connections and understanding of one another. Mutually empathetic towards each other's emotions, a lot of space for growth and personal development. Very easy relationship with lots of "me time" so that one doesn't feel burnt out.

    ENFJ - the second most fun relationship in a way. Being with someone who thinks like me isn't exactly my best idea of a great relationship cause I believe more in diversity leading to growth. Regardless, having a strong understanding with a partner that's vocal about her feelings and at the same time, very caring towards yours as well. I see this leading to "healthier" relationships without sacrificing social needs.

    ENFP - the most fun relationship I would say. There's that strong dynamic of Fe-Ni vs. Fi-Ne which I guess after learning to accept the differences and laying the right boundaries, can be the most exciting relationship. Personally my favorite because I think an ENFP can bring you places and the J that we have can lead to interesting results in those places.

    Outside of the NFs, in no real particular order really.

    INTJ - An extremely mentally stimulating experience. I'm not sure about it being the most physical or romantic of relationships but I believe there is a lot that can be shared and learned. Besides, I believe thinkers love in a different way.

    INTP - Like the above, although with slightly less mental power of the INTJ (speaking from own experiences) but a relationship that has the potential to be very open ended with lots of experiments. Something like, it's easier to convince this girl amongst all of the above to be an avid gamer like oneself or a Korea-media-holic like so many others out there given that they're so open to anything.
    MistressNyx, shakti and its_kristy thanked this post.

  6. #5
    ENFJ - The Givers

    Quote Originally Posted by KC View Post
    As an ENFJ, I think this question has been overly asked ever so periodically.
    I know! I think it's rather sweet though, and rather funny! I see around the same amounts of ENFJ's talking about relationships with the types you've mentioned, so perhaps it's not all bad :)

  7. #6
    ENFJ - The Givers

    Definitely NF. I've been around more than enough females to have come to this conclusion. Sure relationships with other types can work, but they require a lot more effort - especially for an ENFJ male. We NF males need someone who understands our "feels" and sees the world they way we see it. Otherwise, we feel misunderstood or even not accepted.
    ashestohope, Mr. X and OtisPB thanked this post.

  8. #7
    ENFJ - The Givers

    Quote Originally Posted by bigwilly View Post
    Definitely NF. I've been around more than enough females to have come to this conclusion. Sure relationships with other types can work, but they require a lot more effort - especially for an ENFJ male. We NF males need someone who understands our "feels" and sees the world they way we see it. Otherwise, we feel misunderstood or even not accepted.
    That's very interesting.

  9. #8
    ENFJ - The Givers

    For me, definitely NFs! SPs (especially Se-doms) also may attract me as we can have a whale of fun together being all crazy and spontaneous, but I think such a relationship most likely wouldn't be able to fulfill me at a deeper level. I can't imagine myself with an SJ at all, and while NTs might be a good fit for many ENFJs, they are just way too "rational", detached and theoretical for me.


    Now, ENFJs are too similar to me to attract me (like, hey, stop using my own Fe tricks on me, I invented those ), INFJs are great friends but too NT-like to attract me...so that leaves us with the good old NFPs! Being attracted to their enigmatic sensitivity as I was, I was a member of the ENFJ-INFP fan club for long, but I have grown weary of surmising of what exactly introverts think, feel and want, since they're often not that crazy about expressing it. Now I'm in a relationship with an ENFP and it's great, just like KC described below -

    Quote Originally Posted by KC View Post

    ENFP - the most fun relationship I would say. There's that strong dynamic of Fe-Ni vs. Fi-Ne which I guess after learning to accept the differences and laying the right boundaries, can be the most exciting relationship. Personally my favorite because I think an ENFP can bring you places and the J that we have can lead to interesting results in those places.

    .
    It's so refreshing to be in a relationship where both sides are totally open and direct about everything...plus both of us are very emotionally expressive and touchy-feely, so we bond very intensely through our ENF preferences. Not to mention we have a blast together as we are both completely and utterly insane
    Last edited by shakti; 04-28-2013 at 10:06 AM.

  10. #9
    INFP - The Idealists

    Oh, oh pick me! Please love me :c

    My ENFJ, TeddyDaniels, seems to think I'm the fairest of them all.

    Speaking of TeddyDaniels...he should be here any moment now to tell you guys how awesome I am.
    ...

    Honey?



    *echoes*



    :D
    Teddy Daniels thanked this post.

  11. #10
    ENFJ - The Givers

    Quote Originally Posted by MistressNyx View Post
    Oh, oh pick me! Please love me :c

    My ENFJ, TeddyDaniels, seems to think I'm the fairest of them all.

    Speaking of TeddyDaniels...he should be here any moment now to tell you guys how awesome I am.
    ...

    Honey?



    *echoes*



    :D

    I LOVE YOU :D

    I love INFP. They're so cuddly and cute and I just wanna squeeze em' and hold em' and more than anything, protect them c:

    They're also very deep and intellectual once they start to open up more. Well, they are normally, but it's even more so when it comes to their feelings and interpretations. It's just fascinating. They're so smart, and I'm glad to be a part of it every time it's shared.

    I talk so weird... don't I? Sorry for being annoying or something.
    KC, Iselia, word and 2 others thanked this post.


     
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