[ENFP] INFJ or ISFJ lovers?

INFJ or ISFJ lovers?

View Poll Results: Would An ENFP Rather Marry An: INFJ or ISFJ?

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  • INFJ

    5 83.33%
  • ISFJ

    1 16.67%
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This is a discussion on INFJ or ISFJ lovers? within the ENFP Forum - The Inspirers forums, part of the NF's Temperament Forum- The Dreamers category; A question for ENFPs. Which type can you envision having a long lasting relationship with, marriage and platonic: INFJs or ...

  1. #1

    INFJ or ISFJ lovers?

    A question for ENFPs. Which type can you envision having a long lasting relationship with, marriage and platonic: INFJs or ISFJs? If you would, explain the reason for your answer and any personal experience in this scenario you may have.

    ~Cheers

    (If you're too lazy to write a response, then answer by clicking either option on the poll )



  2. #2

    I think the bias will tilt heavily towards INFJs. So be prepared, this thread will become predictable and boring.

    This one is actually pretty difficult, as I trust ISFJs to commit and be always around. Of all types, ISFJs are easy for me to trust, which is super important. Also, I want to feel like a team and have active interest/support in each others interests.

    When going as far as marriage and longterm relationship, I figure it would be more succesful and easy with a ISFJ. However, I would have to settle down on not having the unique and profound conversations I have with INFJs, which helps a lot for keeping me interested and intrigued by the other person. Then again, it's harder to trust INFJs, it will become a battle for the emotional support and who has a tougher life etc. etc. -- ISFJs are a lot more practical and hands-on, not dwelling so much on past old hurts. That is at least how I envision this all.

    If I have to answer the question, then I see it more likely happening with a ISFJ.

    I'm now extremely happy to have had the first reply. This way the thoughtless and inevitable ENFP-INFJ ''yay'' can be absorbed and offset.

    Muhahahahahah

  3. #3

    Quote Originally Posted by nicoloco90 View Post
    I think the bias will tilt heavily towards INFJs. So be prepared, this thread will become predictable and boring.

    This one is actually pretty difficult, as I trust ISFJs to commit and be always around. Of all types, ISFJs are easy for me to trust, which is super important. Also, I want to feel like a team and have active interest/support in each others interests.

    When going as far as marriage and longterm relationship, I figure it would be more succesful and easy with a ISFJ. However, I would have to settle down on not having the unique and profound conversations I have with INFJs, which helps a lot for keeping me interested and intrigued by the other person. Then again, it's harder to trust INFJs, it will become a battle for the emotional support and who has a tougher life etc. etc. -- ISFJs are a lot more practical and hands-on, not dwelling so much on past old hurts. That is at least how I envision this all.

    If I have to answer the question, then I see it more likely happening with a ISFJ.

    I'm now extremely happy to have had the first reply. This way the thoughtless and inevitable ENFP-INFJ ''yay'' can be absorbed and offset.

    Muhahahahahah
    I was assuming it would go the same way too, which I completely understand. From my experience I wouldn't work out with an ENFP but I can see how it would work well with an INFJ. Still, it's nice to hear we can actually be considered when there's so much poor stereotypes about us.
    nicoloco90, PurpleKitti, Llyralen and 2 others thanked this post.

  4. #4

    Quote Originally Posted by JennyJukes View Post
    [...]

    From my experience I wouldn't work out with an ENFP but I can see how it would work well with an INFJ.

    [...]
    What did you take from your experiences with ENFPs?

  5. #5

    Quote Originally Posted by nicoloco90 View Post
    What did you take from your experiences with ENFPs?
    I find with Ne-doms there's sometimes an expectation that I have an immediate answer that they can then bounce off and keep the conversation going. For me, I like to take quite a bit longer to think of my answer which may lead the Ne-dom to become bored or assume I'm not creative or intelligent. I found with my ENFP he spoke a lot, I liked to mostly listen to what he was saying but it took me a while to piece it all together and I couldn't always give him an immediate comment on what he was saying. He thought this meant I was incapable of deep thinking when I was just enjoying listening. I need a lot of patience so I think I converse better with a fellow introvert. I have had good relationships and conversations with ENTPs who have waited for my answer which I think is due to our shared Ti so they maybe understand my need to think longer and construct a well thought out answer. My assumption is that with Fi/Te you guys are confident in what you believe and it's easier to pull it out at will, whilst my Fe/Ti added with inferior Ne tries to consider all possibilities and perfect an answer. Does that make sense and ring true for you?

  6. #6

    Quote Originally Posted by JennyJukes View Post
    I find with Ne-doms there's sometimes an expectation that I have an immediate answer that they can then bounce off and keep the conversation going. For me, I like to take quite a bit longer to think of my answer which may lead the Ne-dom to become bored or assume I'm not creative or intelligent. I found with my ENFP he spoke a lot, I liked to mostly listen to what he was saying but it took me a while to piece it all together and I couldn't always give him an immediate comment on what he was saying. He thought this meant I was incapable of deep thinking when I was just enjoying listening. I need a lot of patience so I think I converse better with a fellow introvert. I have had good relationships and conversations with ENTPs who have waited for my answer which I think is due to our shared Ti so they maybe understand my need to think longer and construct a well thought out answer. My assumption is that with Fi/Te you guys are confident in what you believe and it's easier to pull it out at will, whilst my Fe/Ti added with inferior Ne tries to consider all possibilities and perfect an answer. Does that make sense and ring true for you?
    Thank you for your input! Makes plenty sense, I can see how that works. We both implied similar things from our own perspectives. It helps hearing yours. This way, I can take it into better consideration in the future.
    Marvin the Dendroid thanked this post.

  7. #7

    Well, platonically the two friends I've had the longest are one ISFJ and one INFJ.

    Quote Originally Posted by nicoloco90 View Post
    Of all types, ISFJs are easy for me to trust, which is super important.

    When going as far as marriage and longterm relationship, I figure it would be more succesful and easy with a ISFJ. However, I would have to settle down on not having the unique and profound conversations I have with INFJs. ISFJs are a lot more practical and hands-on.

    If I have to answer the question, then I see it more likely happening with a ISFJ.


    Sounds about right to me.
    Last edited by PurpleKitti; 03-10-2019 at 05:46 AM.
    nicoloco90 thanked this post.

  8. #8

    Quote Originally Posted by nicoloco90 View Post
    I'm now extremely happy to have had the first reply. This way the thoughtless and inevitable ENFP-INFJ ''yay'' can be absorbed and offset.

    Muhahahahahah
    I was gonna respond first but got halfway through the post and thought "nah, sleep is better"
    Last edited by Falling Foxes; 03-10-2019 at 09:50 AM.
    nicoloco90 and PurpleKitti thanked this post.

  9. #9

    I have an obvious intuitive bias. You could have said ISFJ Vs INFP or INTP and the answer would still be the same.

    I've had one amazing relationship with an INFJ, so... Yeah, sorry, I'm boring because I've seen how when it works it can be intense. I'll keep saying it every time someone keeps asking it though so... Not my fault the question keeps coming up.

    I just need someone who can humour me creatively, it's more likely that intuitives will do so at the depth I crave. Obviously some sensors slip through into my circles but I get so easily bored if I can't explore intuitive subjects (for lack of a better description).
    nicoloco90, PurpleKitti, Llyralen and 1 others thanked this post.

  10. #10

    Quote Originally Posted by Falling Foxes View Post
    I was gonna respond first but got hallway through the post and thought "nah, sleep is better"
    good foxy
    Falling Foxes and PurpleKitti thanked this post.


     
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