This is a discussion on Do You Approach People You're Attracted To? within the ENFP Forum - The Inspirers forums, part of the NF's Temperament Forum- The Dreamers category; Originally Posted by Fru2 Forget it, I have my reasons and trust my feelings and judgment. If you have your ...
I like to approach first and initiate conversations about various topics, but it's never flirty. The romantic atmosphere just slowly develops in time on its own if there was a potential for it in the first place. The people I end up really liking and not just being curious about are usually introverts, so the dynamic I reach-they respond rarely changes throughout the relationship.
I've always been afraid of losing freedom and being controlled, so when someone approaches me instead. I can get rigid. The more aggressive and overt they are, the more I lose interest and turn cold. Even if I know I have romantic feelings for someone, more often than not I forgo the relationship with them, unless they seem to value freedom and independence as much as me. I took a chance and compromised in my last relationship, only to reaffirm what I wrote above.
I've known very few other ENFPs IRL and I desperately wanted to meet more of us as a child/teenager. I remember thinking that no one could understand me better than a person of the same type and I still think that if I ever get married, it would have to be either an ENFP or an INFP.
Edit: I have the same problem deciding whether I like a person, trying to figure them out or wanting to learn something from them. Whenever I meet someone interesting, I feel like I'm chasing a white rabbit.
Last edited by Gurndl; 05-01-2019 at 08:47 PM.
When I like someone, I observe first and approach later. Even then, it's in a friendly way, seeing where it could go next.
I would never approach a stranger in a sexual or romantic manner cause that doesn't make any sense to me. For a strong thing to exist, a strong foundation must first be built!