[ENFP] When you know you make someone happy. When you know someone makes you happy.

When you know you make someone happy. When you know someone makes you happy.

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This is a discussion on When you know you make someone happy. When you know someone makes you happy. within the ENFP Forum - The Inspirers forums, part of the NF's Temperament Forum- The Dreamers category; I came home from choir and my husband greeted me with a huge smile and kisses and then I made ...

  1. #1

    When you know you make someone happy. When you know someone makes you happy.

    I came home from choir and my husband greeted me with a huge smile and kisses and then I made him laugh really hard and then he made me laugh really hard and I could tell when he looked at me that I make him happy...really happy and I could see in his eyes that he knows it.

    Then later he was saying he would accept this part in a shadow production of Rocky Horror Picture Show which we watched for the first time last night after someone asked him to play the doctor part. We were both pretty baffled by it... but he said "Oh I might as well do it to help them out. I bet it's not too hard to get high heels for size 13 feet." I said, "You are amazing me right now."

    I don't know... I remembered the times that I really knew and saw in someone's eyes that I make them happy. Joyful.

    It means a lot and although I might lighten burdens, supply comfort, or bring fun to random people, I know that when I see that look in my SO's face then...I think their happiness is the most endearing bonding thing ever. I love his joy. We've arrived. I've arrived finally after some ups and downs over the years. Those of you who are married know what I'm saying. I have always liked to romanticize our relationship, but at this point our relationship is surprising me by being more wonderful than my current expectations.

    Use this space to reminisce about people who make you happy or who you make happy. I know that must be so precious to us. I'm not just talking about romantic partners. I'll give another example in a minute.
    Last edited by Llyralen; 08-24-2019 at 10:25 PM.

  2. #2

    Her name was Katie and she was 7 and I was her nanny and her 2 brothers' nanny for about 1-2 months.

    She was super smart and decisive and clever and we just clicked. Very quickly those kids moved to front and center of my world and making sure she was okay and the joy and trust on her face when I would pick her up from school every day and the amazing surprising off the wall things she demanded that we do together was just so much fun... she was fantastic and a hoot! And actually deep as well in her insights and reflections! She wanted me to herself constantly and I was actually her side kick making happen every fun thing she ever wanted to do (swimming, music, art) and she loved to cuddle. I remember one day she was on my lap and she was reading to me. At one point she pulled my arms around her as tight as she possibly could and said "When I first met you, I thought it would be like 'Pull up your pants!' and then it turned out to be like this." Silent tears were pouring down my cheeks as I knew I had to quit, which might seem weird to anyone else, but I knew I couldn't ultimately be the stability that she needed at that time. I knew I needed to finish my goals and date and get back to my Master's degree. I had only planned to take the job as a summer gig, but I had quickly become the emotional stability of the family and it felt so wrong to me. I did not think she deserved someone who was going to leave soon when that family desperately needed stability and...yeah...it just felt wrong to me. I felt like I needed to quit sooner rather than later.

    Katie, I know we truly made each other happy. I hope you are doing so well using all your bright brain and talents. I'm thinking you are probably 25 now. I hope you find people who make you as happy as you made me and as happy as I made you.
    Last edited by Llyralen; 08-24-2019 at 11:59 PM.

  3. #3

    Is your husband going to try to be the


    Ah, I’ve been there. If you need anything, I’ve done the Rocky Show. Ask me anything, though. I did make up for Curry.

    How beautiful does Tim Curry keep.
    Last edited by INForJoking; 08-24-2019 at 11:44 PM.
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  5. #4

    @INForJoking My husband is supposed to be the doctor in the wheelchair. He will still need fishnets and heels. I can't remember the doctor's name. But this is the husband that a few years ago wouldn't even read Shakespeare (and he loves Shakespeare) out loud to my family... ah, my introvert has been really putting himself out there. I'm pretty proud!

    Tim Curry is the best part of any show he's ever been in. "But isn't it nice?"
    But um... other than Tim Curry being awesome you'd think I'd like the show... but we didn't exactly... I guess it's like when my sister in law is watching Napoleon Dynamite (which we love) and she "doesn't get it' and we are laughing our heads off. But RHPS didn't seem to give me anything to root for...I don't care enough about how people look to just cheer on wearing counter-culture stuff and maybe it didn't seem to "stick it to the man" so...I don't know. I was trying to think what type I would need to be to like it. I don't know, it's going to ruin my street cred to not like this one, I think.

    I love Harold and Maud! I promise, I'm usually cool! I like cult classics, honest! Anyway, my husband said he is taking the part because the acting troop asked him to and that is very unlike him. To do things because a group asked him to? As a very introverted INFP? Big deal! Yeah, I'm pretty impressed.
    Last edited by Llyralen; 08-24-2019 at 11:45 PM.
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  6. #5

    0F66F1DF-80BA-4F73-9043-0D625D06D71F.jpg This Character? Yes, he is a major part in the production and play. It’s just a jump to the left...

    Well, yes, he will have to show off big gams in fishnets!

    What a cool member for him to be!

    I was always Riff Raff. In productions.

    Just enjoy and love the music! This production is nothing, but fun!
    Last edited by INForJoking; 08-24-2019 at 11:51 PM.
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  7. #6

    Quote Originally Posted by INForJoking View Post
    0F66F1DF-80BA-4F73-9043-0D625D06D71F.jpg This Character? Yes, he is a major part in the production and play. It’s just a jump to the left...
    Yep Yep!
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  8. #7

    I have a hard time telling when I make people happy, but I do appreciate being there for children. A while ago a parent told me that at night they say goodnight to everything with their child, and their child says goodnight to the teachers, but he especially mentioned me. That makes me happy to know that I'm a positive influence on their lives, but it's not really the same thing as sharing a moment of laughter like your first post.

    I cherish those times so much though--a few years ago I shared this moment of laughter with an old coworker and it felt so good. I can't even remember what we were talking about anymore, but we both laughed so hard, and it was so nice.

    I remember as a kid me and my best friend would do that, or me and my best cousin, and we'd just fall on the floor we were laughing so much that I could barely breath.

    I love that feeling.

    I think it's also nice to be around people with similar values--like an art class where we have similar goals and can help each other get there. It's not the same as falling on the floor laughing, but it's good to have that connection and understanding of each other.
    INForJoking, Llyralen, VoicesofSpring and 1 others thanked this post.

  9. #8

    My uncle joined the millitary for Iraq when I was 9. I convinced my other cousin to follow me over to the arcade so we can win a couple of teddy bears from the claw machine. Amy and I won two teddy bears, gave it to my uncle and begged him not to join the millitary, but should he go to please take our teddy bears with him and hold it at night to remember us that we will always be praying for his safety. He smiled and cried.

    I remember as a kid, there was a homeless guy who lost his leg in the Viet Nam war, and was blind. Amy and I used to work for my uncle's restaurant, and we'd scrounge up some change and whipped up a nice jug of sugar cane juice for him. I remember the look on his face when he smiled, but Amy and I were always sad to see how he was living on a cardboard with no shelter. We always kind of teared up as we walked by him. The image of his leg wrapped up at the knee, severed. It was momentary bliss, but the feeling that we wished we could do more..
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  10. #9

    Quote Originally Posted by INForJoking View Post
    I had been up for awhile when I first posted. The Rocky Horror Picture Show has a full cult following that yells, throws things, sings things, chants things throughout the performance. If it’s new to you, you might just have to learn the lingo and history of the play. To give you an idea, I had watched the movie from way too early on in my life and had a VHS that my younger ENFJ sis and I watched and acted it out for fun. We acted out musicals because we didn’t have cable.

    When I was first casted in the play, I had zero idea about all the things the crowd interacted in. My dad was a fan of the midnight show in the late 70’s, so he told us about what they did “ back then.” With any production, there will be certain things that are done for the cult classic. If they’re good at what they do, they should be cool with what the cast or fans are comfortable with. While I was in the cast, mostly normal things happened. For you, it might not exactly be your thing or it might grow on you. The mere fact that you and your husband are having a good time is what matters. I know my theatre performance didn’t exactly bring my husband and I together, but he was there in the audience with eyeliner and a cropped tiger shirt.

    I’m proud of your husband for taking the role and I can only hope he gains confidence for doing so. Putting yourself out there is not easy. If he’s grown into it, then, even more applause. You seem like a very supportive wife that is always there. I hope you both gain from this experience and grow closer to one another. The soundtrack is pretty awesome.
    I missed the sentence where you said you did make-up for Curry. Were you/are you a make-up artist? Also, what part did you play? Unfortunately, my husband won't be doing it after-all. He couldn't get the days off of work and had to tell them so... but I love that he was willing to do it!

    I want to get my handwriting into you tonight, actually. I made a goal. I have all sorts of questions, but I'll ask them over in the handwriting analysis thread. =)
    INForJoking and WickerDeer thanked this post.

  11. #10


    I really liked reading those stories--the first one is so sweet. The second one reminded me a little of a recent story I had thought of but didn't share.

    I was walking in the store, and I heard a guy seeming to be talking to himself or yelling or something, and I thought 'he sounds like he's experiencing psychosis from mental illness.' I decided to get something from the store for him which is really unusual for me.

    I got him a heavily discounted salad with nuts and cheese in it, because I figured he probably didn't get a lot of vegetables and I didn't want to just give him something that'd rot his teeth, since he also might not brush his teeth regularly.

    So I walked up to him thinking 'gosh what if he kills me and then at least some people will say 'well serves her right she shouldn't be walking up to people who are talking to themselves,'' but when I asked him if he liked salad and gave it to him, he said 'I love greens..' And he started talking about how he and his wife used to play music at the farmers' markets...because the salad reminded him of that, I guess.

    And then he started telling me a story about how this little autistic girl used to not be able to talk or anything, but she would hear the music and go up to them, then really listen to the music and get into it and dance and stay there for as long as she could. He imitated her closing her eyes and swaying, and I really understood what he was saying because it sounded so much like what I have seen non-verbal children do.

    And idk--it just really sort of threw me a little bit, because I was just listening to this guy talk about how he was so happy for the autistic child to be touched by the music even if she couldn't talk. Like she could understand the music and sort of connect with others through it.

    So it ended up being a great experience of sharing stories and a really heavily discounted salad, and also good for me to remember to follow some of my instincts, while also being careful of course. Lately I've been around someone who acts very defensively to anyone different, so it was also sort of a way for me to rebel against that and it turned out good for everyone, and I got to hear a great story about an autistic child enjoying music.
    @Llyralen That's too bad your husband didn't get the days off. If it wasn't absolutely necessary for him to work, I hope his employer is visited by the ghost of Christmas past/future/present like Scrooge was, and at least one of those ghosts should be dressed like Frankenfurter and sings like Tim Curry about why he should give his employees time off to do important stuff...that would be an awesome Christmas play too.
    INForJoking, Llyralen, strawberryLola and 1 others thanked this post.

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