[ENFP] What do ENFP 4w5s look like to you?

What do ENFP 4w5s look like to you?

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This is a discussion on What do ENFP 4w5s look like to you? within the ENFP Forum - The Inspirers forums, part of the NF's Temperament Forum- The Dreamers category; As specified in the title, what kind of impression do ENFPs combined with a 4w5 enneagram give off? What were ...

  1. #1
    ENFP - The Inspirers

    What do ENFP 4w5s look like to you?

    As specified in the title, what kind of impression do ENFPs combined with a 4w5 enneagram give off? What were some that you have known like? If you don't know any, how would you imagine the combination to be?

    Please don't use this thread to pooh-pooh the combination or say that only introverts can be a 4w5. This is not the thread for that. Thank you.



  2. #2

    ENFPs are the most introverted extraverts, so 4w5 ENFPs aren't actually that rare. I'm one, and I believe @crumbs is one.

    My 4w5 and 7w6 are almost neck and neck, and sometimes I feel like I'm two completely different people in one body. When I'm around a group of friends, or just around people I'm comfortable with in general I act like a 7w6. But when I'm around strangers, or people I'm not very comfortable with then I become very shy and awkward. I won't approach strangers, and if someone approaches me I'm very visibly uncomfortable. However if I'm in an incredibly good mood, on a caffeine high, or drunk for example, then I become a 7w6 again, even around strangers.

    I've had people call me a kind, caring, nurturing person, so I guess I give off that impression. Although I don't really see that in myself. That's another thing that is pretty obvious about me, I can be pretty negative and constantly put myself down. I'm getting better about keeping those thoughts to myself though. I also didn't used to take compliments well, but I'm getting better at just saying thank you. I can be overly sensitive, it's been noted that I don't take criticism or teasing very well. That's another thing I'm working on. If I'm not in 7w6 mode, I imagine people can tell I'm usually melancholy just by looking at me. I don't give off the impression of being weird, but I'm definitely quirky. I think it's extremely important to be myself, while trying to conform at the same time. I don't know if that makes sense, but it does to me. A good example is I like to wear minimalist shoes, but I still try to wear the most normal looking minimalist shoes I can find.

    My 5 wing reveals itself in my tendency to be overly obsessive. If I'm interested in something, then I will research that topic nonstop until I get bored, or until I find something new to obsess about. And usually all I talk about is whatever my current obsession is lol. I've also been told I can be overly argumentative. Which is true, if I think I'm right about something I really don't like to drop it until I convince them they are wrong, or until they can convince me I'm wrong. I can be pretty skeptical, I tend to not believe what people tell me unless they have hard evidence, or until I do the research myself. It really bothers me when someone says something that doesn't make sense, or if something doesn't make sense in general. I am overly concerned with things being right, and being right myself. I am ocd about spelling things correctly, and if I notice that I do make a typo, I ALWAYS have to go back and correct myself. Or if I'm about to use a word I'm unsure about, I'll open up a new tab and Google the definition. If it happens in conversation, I'm prone to saying "is that right? did I use that word correctly?" When I send drunk texts you can never tell, because then I become even more meticulous, making sure spelling, grammar, and punctuation are COMPLETELY correct before sending it off. I also have a strong distaste for what I consider shallow conversation. I'd much prefer to be alone in my own head in introspective contemplation, rather than talk about the weather, or what you had for breakfast.
    Last edited by AdroElectro; 12-25-2014 at 06:46 PM.

  3. #3
    ENFP - The Inspirers

    Quote Originally Posted by AdroElectro View Post
    ENFPs are the most introverted extraverts, so 4w5 ENFPs aren't actually that rare. I'm one, and I believe @crumbs is one.

    My 4w5 and 7w6 are almost neck and neck, and sometimes I feel like I'm two completely different people in one body. When I'm around a group of friends, or just around people I'm comfortable with in general I act like a 7w6. But when I'm around strangers, or people I'm not very comfortable with then I become very shy and awkward. I won't approach strangers, and if someone approaches me I'm very visibly uncomfortable. However if I'm in an incredibly good mood, on a caffeine high, or drunk for example, then I become a 7w6 again, even around strangers.

    I've had people call me a kind, caring, nurturing person, so I guess I give off that impression. Although I don't really see that in myself. That's another thing that is pretty obvious about me, I can be pretty negative and constantly put myself down. I'm getting better about keeping those thoughts to myself though. I also didn't used to take compliments well, but I'm getting better at just saying thank you. I can be overly sensitive, it's been noted that I don't take criticism or teasing very well. That's another thing I'm working on. If I'm not in 7w6 mode, I imagine people can tell I'm usually melancholy just by looking at me. I don't give off the impression of being weird, but I'm definitely quirky. I think it's extremely important to be myself, while trying to conform at the same time. I don't know if that makes sense, but it does to me. A good example is I like to wear minimalist shoes, but I still try to wear the most normal looking minimalist shoes I can find.

    My 5 wing reveals itself in my tendency to be overly obsessive. If I'm interested in something, then I will research that topic nonstop until I get bored, or until I find something new to obsess about. And usually all I talk about is whatever my current obsession is lol. I've also been told I can be overly argumentative. Which is true, if I think I'm right about something I really don't like to drop it until I convince them they are wrong, or they can convince me I'm wrong. I can be pretty skeptical, I tend to not believe what people tell me unless they have hard evidence, or until I do the research myself. It really bothers me when someone says something that doesn't make sense, or if something doesn't make sense in general. I am overly concerned with things being right, and being right myself. I am ocd about spelling things correctly, and if I noticed that I did make a typo, I ALWAYS have to go back and correct myself. Or if I'm about to use a word I'm unsure about, I'll open up a new tab and Google the definition. If it happens in conversation, I'm prone to saying "is that right? did I use that word correctly?" When I send drunk texts you can never tell, because then I become even more meticulous, making sure spelling, grammar, and punctuation are COMPLETELY correct before sending it off. I also have a strong distaste for what I consider shallow conversation. I'd much prefer to be alone in my own head in introspective contemplation, rather than talk about the weather, or what you had for breakfast.
    In a word, you're "awesome!" Bravo.

    I'm a 2w3 so I shouldn't say anything, but bravo.
    AdroElectro thanked this post.

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  5. #4

    Not at all. If I were to summarize 4w5 ENFPs based soley on myself, I'd say they have lower self-esteem, less confidence, are shyer, more sensitive, more introspective, place a higher value on Te, and are more into researching things for fun. If I'm awesome, you're awesome. Everyone is awesome. Everything is awesome!



    Edit: @Serenitylala Just realized I did the whole "can't take a compliment" thing lol. Being a 4 really sucks sometimes, being fixated on flaws so much.
    Last edited by AdroElectro; 12-26-2014 at 02:55 AM.
    backdrop12 and Serenitylala thanked this post.

  6. #5

    @AdroElectro how did you know? *squints at you*

    *looks in mirror* in my personal opinion, I think ENFP 4w5s are short, unkempt Asian women. But, like, that's just me.

    In all seriousness, though, 4w5 ENFPs tend to be the socially awkward cousins of the more rambunctious, friendly 7w6s or the dignified, peaceful 9w1s. We overanalyze interactions with other people because we're so bent on trying to convey the best version of what we've idealized as ourselves. We don't totally get what's socially appropriate, and sometimes, we try really hard to fit in (and fail miserably and kick ourselves for it and decide that it's better to be full on crazy instead of being only sort of crazy). ENFP 4w5s tend to be super self-sensitive - younger 4w5s (children) will be very moody or dramatic, while slightly older 4w5s (college students, 20 somethings) tend to be more aware of how emotional they can be and try to cover it up by over-compensating with logic or cynicism from their 5 wing. Expanding on that, if you had heightened hearing, you would speak quieter, so those slightly older 4w5s might have reached the height of their 4 peak and try to feel less or cover up their insecurities by indulging in their idealized version of themselves, which is usually a more objective, more organized, and all over more put together person. Which I'm saying because it's what I tend to do, but I'm doing this thing now where I'm just upfront accepting that I'm an unorganized, burger loving history geek and not some svelte European vamp with two pieces of furniture and a law degree. Although if you are that, then by all means, be that.

    IRL, this translates into ENFPs who are a bit geekier (read: know more fictional characters than actual people), may not be vocal about their own feelings and tend to go to extremes when they do show real emotion (usually resulting in outbursts of inappropriate or unhealthy behavior, with more extreme extremes like meltdowns or addiction), and can be apologetically insensitive upon first meeting (because of their tendency to live in their own heads and act primarily on their own terms instead of others', but then still feel really guilty about it). At a certain age, ENFP 4w5s might come to terms with themselves and find a way to portray a standard level of crazy while only letting a very specific group of people see the real breadth of their craziness (when they learn how to balance their 4 and 5 wing). From what I've noticed around everywhere on the Internet as well as everywhere on myself, ENFP 4w5s also tend to be generously self effacing, because we're almost always afraid of being seen as too serious or too crazy, which we know we have the capacity to be. There's this constant push and pull between being honest with yourself and being well-liked for being yourself, and you can see that in the number of phases that an ENFP 4w5 goes through as they try to find some aspect of themselves that they can show other people and be proud of at the same time ("Bowties are cool!" *some episodes later* "Fezzes are cool!" *some more episodes later* "NO WAIT STETSONS ARE COOL"). Also, I get this sense from other people when they talk to me that they think that I'm hiding something (which I probably am). I think a good fictional example of an ENFP 4w5 is the Eleventh Doctor, while a real life example of one would be Robin Williams.
    AdroElectro, AdroElectro, AdroElectro and 17 others thanked this post.

  7. #6
  8. #7
    ENFP - The Inspirers

    I think I'm the odd one, I'm a 9w8.
    AdroElectro, AdroElectro, AdroElectro and 12 others thanked this post.

  9. #8
    ENFP - The Inspirers

    Any new ideas? :)

  10. #9

    Quote Originally Posted by crumbs View Post
    @AdroElectro how did you know? *squints at you*

    *looks in mirror* in my personal opinion, I think ENFP 4w5s are short, unkempt Asian women. But, like, that's just me.

    In all seriousness, though, 4w5 ENFPs tend to be the socially awkward cousins of the more rambunctious, friendly 7w6s or the dignified, peaceful 9w1s. We overanalyze interactions with other people because we're so bent on trying to convey the best version of what we've idealized as ourselves. We don't totally get what's socially appropriate, and sometimes, we try really hard to fit in (and fail miserably and kick ourselves for it and decide that it's better to be full on crazy instead of being only sort of crazy). ENFP 4w5s tend to be super self-sensitive - younger 4w5s (children) will be very moody or dramatic, while slightly older 4w5s (college students, 20 somethings) tend to be more aware of how emotional they can be and try to cover it up by over-compensating with logic or cynicism from their 5 wing. Expanding on that, if you had heightened hearing, you would speak quieter, so those slightly older 4w5s might have reached the height of their 4 peak and try to feel less or cover up their insecurities by indulging in their idealized version of themselves, which is usually a more objective, more organized, and all over more put together person. Which I'm saying because it's what I tend to do, but I'm doing this thing now where I'm just upfront accepting that I'm an unorganized, burger loving history geek and not some svelte European vamp with two pieces of furniture and a law degree. Although if you are that, then by all means, be that.

    IRL, this translates into ENFPs who are a bit geekier (read: know more fictional characters than actual people), may not be vocal about their own feelings and tend to go to extremes when they do show real emotion (usually resulting in outbursts of inappropriate or unhealthy behavior, with more extreme extremes like meltdowns or addiction), and can be apologetically insensitive upon first meeting (because of their tendency to live in their own heads and act primarily on their own terms instead of others', but then still feel really guilty about it). At a certain age, ENFP 4w5s might come to terms with themselves and find a way to portray a standard level of crazy while only letting a very specific group of people see the real breadth of their craziness (when they learn how to balance their 4 and 5 wing). From what I've noticed around everywhere on the Internet as well as everywhere on myself, ENFP 4w5s also tend to be generously self effacing, because we're almost always afraid of being seen as too serious or too crazy, which we know we have the capacity to be. There's this constant push and pull between being honest with yourself and being well-liked for being yourself, and you can see that in the number of phases that an ENFP 4w5 goes through as they try to find some aspect of themselves that they can show other people and be proud of at the same time ("Bowties are cool!" *some episodes later* "Fezzes are cool!" *some more episodes later* "NO WAIT STETSONS ARE COOL"). Also, I get this sense from other people when they talk to me that they think that I'm hiding something (which I probably am). I think a good fictional example of an ENFP 4w5 is the Eleventh Doctor, while a real life example of one would be Robin Williams.
    WOW wtf, this is great.

    Today I have been wracking my brains to figure out if I am a 9w8 or just a disappointed, adjusted-to-society 4w5. I always hide my true feelings because no one wants to see that disgusting mess.
    I relate to what you have written so heavily, it's pretty hilarious. I even made a post on the enneagram forum asking for help. I got some really excellent replies to do with the difference between a type 9 and a type 4. https://personalitycafe.com/enneagram...2-4w5-9w8.html
    crumbs thanked this post.

  11. #10

    I'm 7w8, 4w5 and 9w8.

    7w8 is my common mode of function and the most developed. 4w5 takes control in moments when in the company of somebody I love.


     

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