An Sx dom in a relationship with an Sx dom

An Sx dom in a relationship with an Sx dom

Hello Guest! Sign up to join the discussion below...
Page 1 of 3 1 2 3 LastLast
Results 1 to 10 of 25
Thank Tree36Thanks

This is a discussion on An Sx dom in a relationship with an Sx dom within the Enneagram Personality Theory Forum forums, part of the Personality Type Forums category; I read an article that hypothesised that for Sx doms, the best partner would be an Sx second. Sx last ...

  1. #1
    Type 7w6

    An Sx dom in a relationship with an Sx dom

    I read an article that hypothesised that for Sx doms, the best partner would be an Sx second. Sx last would lack the intensity needed for an Sx dom. With an Sx second the only problems are that you have to pick between someone with the opposite flow to you OR someone with your ignoring as their dom. However, both of these were said to be preferable to Sx & Sx since that's too much intensity and both partners end up never being able to get enough from the other. This was an issue not found in So & So or Sp & Sp relationships.

    I wanted to see / hear some examples of Sx doms together (either your own experiences or celebrities / fictional) to see how that theory would play out in reality.

    Link to article.
    Jawz and Jamaia thanked this post.



  2. #2
    Type 4w5

    I think I saw 2 Sx doms at Mcdnalds the other day. They were holding each others faces in their hands while their faces were inches apart from each other, then the guy covered their faces with his hand sort of making hand tent while they spoke, like they wer ebeing secretive while in public. I thought it was nice and unusual.

    I am Sx second but if I guessed, even though you are not asking for more theories or guesses, I would think Sx dom with another Sx dom would feel like they can't get enough from the other Sx dom because it seems like there is a promise that this person can really fulfill your Sx fully since they are just as intense, but when you realize that even their intensity doesn't completely satisfy you you want more and more to try and be satisfied, but you keep realizing it's still not enough. With Sx second or last or whatever, it might be more balanced, like there is no promise your Sx would be fully fulfilled so any amount of intensity is something you relish in and are grateful for because those moments standout in contrast to the more mundane or even keel moments, so you fish for more of those moments instead of fishing for full satisfaction. It becomes a desert instead of a main course meal, you don't get full from it, you enjoy it from time to time.

    This song sounds like a SX dom Sx dom relationship.


  3. #3

    Quote Originally Posted by mrrrmaid View Post
    ...to see how that theory would play out in reality.
    My life experience as SX/SP doesn't match the article in any way.

    IMO, it's purely theory having nothing to do with reality. Someone getting lost in concepts, logically manipulating those concepts, then projecting those concepts upon reality. The map is not the territory. You don't draw a map from your imagination then see how it fits reality. You understand reality as it is then draw a map of what's there. At least if you want it to represent reality accurately.

    A man should look for what is, and not what he thinks should be.
    - Albert Einstein

  4. Remove Advertisements
    PersonalityCafe.com
    Advertisements
     

  5. #4

    Sx/so usually marry and reproduce with each other, I know that much. And the theory mentioned in the OP... well it's flawed because sx is also attracted to stimulating things just as much as stimulating people, so they could both enjoy going to a gun range or anything else that gives them a ton of stimulation or they could turn to two different stimulating things and alternate between being together and stimulating things/events separately.
    Last edited by richard nixon; 08-14-2018 at 07:18 PM.
    L P thanked this post.

  6. #5
    Type 8w7

    i didn't read the article.

    Kink world is almost entirely Sx Dom.

    I date primarly Sx doms and am Sx. We have good, intense sex. And stuff.
    Dare, richard nixon and mrrrmaid thanked this post.

  7. #6
    Type 5w4

    Quote Originally Posted by mrrrmaid View Post
    ...both of these were said to be preferable to Sx & Sx since that's too much intensity and both partners end up never being able to get enough from the other.
    Hmm, a type often described as 'all or nothing' who 'lives for intensity' and 'just can't get enough' shouldn't do something bc it's "too intense" and they will "never be able to get enough"... Do I giggle or drool? What can I say except (big smile); it's good (sx/sp + sx/sp here).

    For me personally, I would only rule out dating someone who is 1) dominant in my blind spot (so/sx, so/sp) or 2) doesn't have my dominant in their top two (sp/so). That seems like asking for trouble. Same instinct is easy, a slight variation may be okay (sx/so or sp/sx) but a lot comes down to the individual, as it always does. My best friend of 6 years is sp/sx, we can be around each other constantly and never tire of one another, np.

    That said, I'm generally inclined to believe that instincts will be the biggest make it or break it factor in compatibility. Perhaps especially for sx since we may have special needs when it comes to level of intimacy/interdependence/intensity etc that realistically can't be achieved in most relationships where it's not sx + sx. More often than not, just hearing the PG rated version of what I want in a relationship has people upset, lol.

    It's so nice to be with someone who can not only satisfy my sx needs, who not only views things the same way as I do and not only accepts/likes what I'm about but needs it himself. That isn't just convenient romantic bliss, it means there is a very real long-term safeguard build in (for both of us).
    Jawz, g_w, knife and 6 others thanked this post.

  8. #7
    Type 8w7

    i read somewhere when we are looking for a mate we tend to behave like an opposite. So, an Sp will act and be attracted to Sx.

    I got married to an Sp/Sx. I'm Sx/So. It was NOT a good match long term.

  9. #8
    Type 7w6

    Quote Originally Posted by drmiller100 View Post
    I got married to an Sp/Sx. I'm Sx/So. It was NOT a good match long term.
    If its not too personal could you explain more why not?

  10. #9

    It's what happens when fire meets fuel.

    For me with my ex (ESFP 7w8 Sx/So), it was an intense infatuation at first but over time the things we loved about each other turned out to be more idealized than real and neither of us were able to keep up with each other's expectations ... Somehow there was always a power struggle. She was controlling. I wanted to shirk control and assert my independence.

    At first we were kinda like a rockstar couple for a short while but over time a lot of bad habits came out (not just hers and mine) and whatever connection we had at first just started eroding. I started looking for my stimulation needs to be fulfilled through immersing myself in hobbies and colleagues .. She did the same with her friends and college which slowly pulled us apart.

    Eventually, the marriage became fairly abusive on both our sides. The sex and romance dried up and we were both done and wanted out by the third year. She was emotionally cheating. I guess I did too with my clients and colleagues. It's not something I've admitted before, but yeah - I crave intense connections and I chased them with reckless abandon in the past.

    I was looking for an escape and our fights were literally destructive.

    I'm currently with Sp/Sx and it's both comfortable and intense and I'm happy. In fact, today is our 4th anniversary and I'm pretty excited. She does not show her excitement outwardly as much as I feel or want, but I've come to accept that that's who she is. What doesn't show doesn't mean it doesn't exist. I've grown quite a bit over the last few years to understand where my judgement of my partners has been wrong in the past.
    Last edited by SilentScream; 08-16-2018 at 02:19 AM.
    drmiller100, L P, Sunshower127 and 1 others thanked this post.

  11. #10
    Type 8w7

    Quote Originally Posted by mrrrmaid View Post
    If its not too personal could you explain more why not?
    when I said you "I do" she said "not any more."

    She wanted a reliable bread winner. I made a LOT of money, until I figured out it would never be enough. So then I gave up (enneagram 8) and immersed myself in alcohol.

    I wanted intensity and friendship, and she wanted money and security.
    Jawz and mrrrmaid thanked this post.


     
Page 1 of 3 1 2 3 LastLast

Similar Threads

  1. [INFP] I need help in my relationship with an INTP
    By KasKas19 in forum INFP Forum - The Idealists
    Replies: 11
    Last Post: 07-17-2018, 08:34 PM
  2. [INTP] I need help in my relationship with an INTP
    By KasKas19 in forum INTP Forum - The Thinkers
    Replies: 13
    Last Post: 07-14-2018, 06:31 PM
  3. [ISTP] Yep. Having an affair with an ISTP.
    By norasworld in forum ISTP Forum - The Mechanics
    Replies: 51
    Last Post: 04-28-2018, 01:37 AM

Bookmarks

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  
All times are GMT -7. The time now is 08:54 AM.
Information provided on the site is meant to complement and not replace any advice or information from a health professional.
© 2014 PersonalityCafe
 

SEO by vBSEO 3.6.0