[ENTJ] A question for ENTJ guys

A question for ENTJ guys

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This is a discussion on A question for ENTJ guys within the ENTJ Forum - The Executives forums, part of the NT's Temperament Forum- The Intellects category; In the past couple months I've become interested in someone I believe to be an ENTJ, and I think the ...

  1. #1
    INTJ - The Scientists

    A question for ENTJ guys

    In the past couple months I've become interested in someone I believe to be an ENTJ, and I think the feelings are mutual. We kid around a lot in our spare time at school, and I've caught him a time or two looking at me when he thinks I'm not paying attention. He rarely talks about his interests, so I have a hard time starting a conversation with him without just using small talk. Once it gets going, we usually get past the awkwardness and we find something either funny or deep to discuss. He also told me I was "different" from other girls. I asked him if this was a good or bad thing, and in his typical aura of mysteriousness he said something along the lines of "Well, it's not a bad thing," and then stopped talking.
    I guess I first have to ask if you think he likes me. If yes, do you think I should pursue it by asking him to go to a haunted corn maze with me this weekend? He's never talked for or against such a thing, but I've heard you guys like adventure, so I thought it might be a good ice breaker.
    The main reasons I'm questioning this are:
    1. I thought ENTJ guys were usually very forward with their intentions.
    2. I'm terrified that if I make a move first and he rejects it that I might lose his friendship.
    What do you think? Thanks!



  2. #2
    ENTJ - The Executives

    Different from most girls --- definitely a good thing.

    Doesn't mean to say he has a romantic interest, but he'll definitely respect you for not being one of the sheep. That shit pisses us off.

    Ask him straight up if he wants to go to that thing. If he's interested, he'll jump at it unless he has something else on which is more important (romantic dates don't come high up on our lists I think, so don't be too offended if he says no in favour of doing someone else he's already committed to).

  3. #3

    Trust your instincts, they seem sound. He will appreciate honesty. Call it like it is and he will react well.

    If you like him and want to take him to a corn maze, invite him. Odds are good he will be equally honest right back to you. He may be significantly more "forward" with you, once he is confident that he's not over-exposing himself. Right now he may wonder if he's "reading" you correctly. If you make that clear, you might find him less guarded.

    If you lose your friendship with him because you were forward or were honest with him about your feelings, he's not much of an ENTJ and it wasn't much of a friendship.

    Stick your neck out on this one, it very well may pay off.
    Vanitas and Katali thanked this post.

  4. #4
    ENTJ - The Executives

    I think you're making the right call. I'm an ENTJ and I have a hard time with girls when I actually care what they think. Making the first move to me is a huge positive. Anyway I think you're doing this the right way I'd say go for asking him this weekend but physically let him make the first move.

  5. #5
    ENTJ - The Executives

    Quote Originally Posted by Dippy Detective View Post
    I guess I first have to ask if you think he likes me.
    He's considering you.

    If yes, do you think I should pursue it by asking him to go to a haunted corn maze with me this weekend?
    This action will toss it all on the table for him. Wont hurt to ask, but if he turns you down don't mention it again, just act like it's no big deal.

    He's never talked for or against such a thing, but I've heard you guys like adventure, so I thought it might be a good ice breaker.
    Adventurous, yes, but not really in that aspect. But it's not like it hurts to ask. If he says no, it doesn't mean he's not into you, I would've said no back in school no matter what girl asked me. I just didn't do things I didn't find interesting.

    The main reasons I'm questioning this are:
    1. I thought ENTJ guys were usually very forward with their intentions.
    Yeah we are. But you are coming at this looking for a "relationship". We don't just open up like a crackerjack box, shits more like a rubix cube. And even when we do open up, it's an act a lot of the time.

    2. I'm terrified that if I make a move first and he rejects it that I might lose his friendship.
    Only if you start acting weird or something like that. And if he doesn't want to be friends because you like him, than he's a douche, fuck him. Don't be scared of dbags.

  6. #6
    ENTJ - The Executives

    Quote Originally Posted by pwiloson View Post
    (romantic dates don't come high up on our lists I think, so don't be too offended if he says no in favour of doing someone else he's already committed to).
    This is not true for me. Thing is I don't usually see stuff at dates as other sees it. Too many girls thinks, imo, that whenever there is one on one time outside school as a date. Well I just see it as nothing special just a oppurtunity to do something and get to know the girl.

    Just for saying "you're different" that cant mean other than a good thing. And by saying that I think he also means that you connect on same intellectual level which is vital in a partner for us.

    My take is to dont be afraid to ask him out. He will unlikely be unpolite but dont shoot too straight. (Although I dont think you will as INTJ). Just go easy with things and they will sort out since you already connecting. :)

  7. #7
    INTJ - The Scientists

    After overanalyzing the crap out of the whole situation, I found the gumption to strike up a conversation with him online. He seemed very uninterested in talking to me. I asked him how the weekend had been so far and he said he had been pretty busy. I then asked him how work was today and he didn't respond. I'm a little confused. He has even initiated contact with me before and then dropped it like a hot potato a couple messages in. I find it odd how he is so friendly and accessible in person but treats me like I am bothering him in text.
    It's not like I'm going to be devastated if this doesn't turn out, but I was kind of hopeful since you guys thought I had a chance.
    Stay tuned for the next installment of my love life!
    Penguin thanked this post.

  8. #8
    ENTJ - The Executives

    Hmm.. I dont like when things go to easy. Or let me rephrase, when things goes easy it loses my interest since it is a sealed deal. Although when stuff that should be "organized" isnt, I wake up and think "ehhh?".

    If he seems "uninterested" again. Then pull the big trumph card and ignore him and make stuff that will make him jealous. Like talk a lot to another guy or something. Or just do something that he doesnt expect. If that was me, that would initiate to put my things together and go after you. Assuming now that he likes you.

  9. #9
    ENTJ - The Executives

    Lol trying to make him jealous is the worst thing to do. If he's smart, he's figured out you're into him. Trying to make him jealous is petty.

    Play the "i don't give a shit card" and act like your talk. Don't act any different. Honestly, the whole "act like yourself"shit works because that's the most confusing thing you could do. It will make you interesting. People try too hard with this relationship stuff. It's really not that complicated, once you break the ice, which you have.

    Seriously though... I have never wanted a chic I haven't gotten to go out with me. That's not me being concieted, that's a fact. It's not always instant, it can take time, but I just never worry about it, because in the end I know I'll get it. This goes for everything btw, not just relationships.
    Vanitas, Penguin and Katali thanked this post.

  10. #10
    ENTJ - The Executives

    I agree with CCCXXIX, jealousy is not the best road to go. I would see that as a betrayal to my loyalty and then act accordingly. If he is into you, he will enjoy doing things together, things that give him a chance to show you that he is there for you.

    G/L.


     
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