Alight, so this is a rant more than anything, but it's also a place to get some advice and opinions on this matter. I'm not out here to bash on ENTJ's in general. I have an awesome friend whom I regularly play chess with that is an ENTJ. He's the only guy I know who can bash me more than I bash on him. I have another ENTJ friend whom is incredibly successful financially and we chat at the local pub about every other day on a wide variety of topics. They're both awesome.
So here's the issue. My brother is being an idiot. He's a rather unsuccessful ENTJ, and it's tearing him apart. The guy is quite intelligent, but has been a bit foolish in his life so far. Our parents run companies, which has afforded us the time to sit around and not do much. He got married selling a story that he was successful, and he simply worked on the side for paps. Paps company isn't doing so well, and . . . he's getting divorced. The guy spent his time mostly skydiving (he's a pro), and playing world of warcraft. Yes, he's ranked number 46 in the world as a mage, but c'mon now. . . I'm superb at video games and gave that junk up like a decade ago. There's far too much going on in the world to be doing stupid things that are meaningless, IMO.
Now the house got sold, he's signed the divorce papers, and has been at the 'rents castle for the last 2-3 months feeling like shit. I've tried to stay out of his way, as I know my emotional support would be subpar as an ENTP (might actually be ENFP). I can give practical advice, but sympathy is nearly non-existent. Empathy, through the rough, but not much else.
He keeps saying stupid things. It's like he finds the need to put me down to feel he's not a complete and utter loser. I keep just wanting to walk away, but it's becoming too much. So I'm calling him out, and he's left with not a damned reasonable thing left in return... so the frequency of these stupid things continues. He's basically trying to order my life, when it's his that is spiraling out of control. I'm good. Have goals, am hitting subgoal-metrics, diversified my options for the next year, and enjoying life, but damned if he's not trying to spread his hell my way.
Is this normal for ENTJ's in a rut? Do they turn into bullies if they don't feel that their life is in their control? I hear him say things like, "great men are always in control of their lives until the end", and I can't help but think how idiotic and denial-ridden such a statement is. In my mind, absolute control is like absolute freedom. . . but a figment of our EGO. It's a push/pull between personal control, and shit outside of it, always. He seems to be trying to absolute his way through life, and it just causes him more suffering and unconsciousness. Does this even get through to you guys?
Maybe I just need to stay out of his way for a half year or so. I have my buttons that he knows how to push. Other ENTJ's don't phase me. I have many coping mechanisms and outright aggressive tactics if need be, but my brother is someone that I really want to connect with and respect, and these idiocies are really getting under my skin.
Suggestions? Just suck it up, and let the weak man be? I sure as hell hope he gets through it.