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This is a discussion on Ask an ENTJ a question within the ENTJ Forum - The Executives forums, part of the NT's Temperament Forum- The Intellects category; Originally Posted by Mr Canis Yeah, I still cringe at it, but I have worked hard to banish the phrase; ...

  1. #521
    Unknown

    Quote Originally Posted by Mr Canis View Post
    Yeah, I still cringe at it, but I have worked hard to banish the phrase; "Well, actually..." from my vocabulary. I get tired of being the worlds "fact checker" and sometimes people just need to be wrong.
    I've found that people I've interacted with in the past have gotten defensive over things as simple as my diction, and anything that smacks of being a know-it-all. I certainly don't aspire to be one, but for whatever reason it's automatic for me to fact check. The thing is, I'm not trying to belittle people or act superior; unfortunately, people interpret it this way.

    Quote Originally Posted by ToughLilCookie View Post
    Well...I get paid for it.
    Hah! I should find another job that lets me do that, then. Although, my coworkers are pretty intelligent and take it in stride. I've found that it's mostly the average person that gets defensive about fact-checking and word choice.

  2. #522

    Quote Originally Posted by koalaroo View Post
    Do any other ENTJs/Te-doms have difficulty not automatically correcting the factually incorrect?

    I'm trying to work on this, but I want to know if this is a me thing, or if it's type related. (Again, this doesn't mean that I shouldn't or won't work on it.)
    Depends what it is, and whether or not it matters. But, ya.

  3. #523
    Unknown

    Quote Originally Posted by MsBossyPants View Post
    Depends what it is, and whether or not it matters. But, ya.
    I'm trying to learn the parameters of when and where to point out discrepancies like incorrect information. My therapist has suggested "samwiching" the factual stuff in between validating phrases, basically to soften the individual or audience into a receptive state. Keep in mind that I'm not totally socially retarded; I'm great at reading people in person, and I don't typically correct people in these situations. However, in any text-based or phone conversation, I have a disconnect in "reading" my audience and making the information more palatable for those on the receiving end.
    MsBossyPants thanked this post.

  4. #524

    Quote Originally Posted by koalaroo View Post
    I'm trying to learn the parameters of when and where to point out discrepancies like incorrect information. My therapist has suggested "samwiching" the factual stuff in between validating phrases, basically to soften the individual or audience into a receptive state. Keep in mind that I'm not totally socially retarded; I'm great at reading people in person, and I don't typically correct people in these situations. However, in any text-based or phone conversation, I have a disconnect in "reading" my audience and making the information more palatable for those on the receiving end.
    Striking at their soft underbelly softens them up, too.

    If it's factually inaccurate, and it matters, go for it. Validating phrases? Meh ... Not always appropriate. They sometimes come off as condescending, especially in print.

    Maybe try sitting with it for just a bit and thinking it through before you reply. Try to not knee-jerk a response.
    koalaroo thanked this post.

  5. #525
    ENTJ - The Executives

    Quote Originally Posted by koalaroo View Post
    Do any other ENTJs/Te-doms have difficulty not automatically correcting the factually incorrect?

    I'm trying to work on this, but I want to know if this is a me thing, or if it's type related. (Again, this doesn't mean that I shouldn't or won't work on it.)
    Yes, however I've learned that people find it annoying and condescending therefore my intent was lost in translation. So, I quit.
    koalaroo and Dao thanked this post.

  6. #526
    ENTJ

    Quote Originally Posted by koalaroo View Post
    Do any other ENTJs/Te-doms have difficulty not automatically correcting the factually incorrect?

    I'm trying to work on this, but I want to know if this is a me thing, or if it's type related. (Again, this doesn't mean that I shouldn't or won't work on it.)
    I let the details slide but if it's someone I'm close to, I like having a discussion about it. My friend thought vaccines caused autism yesterday, so we had a talk about vaccination in general and did some research. She said I'm much nicer about it than most of the people she's talked to and that I seemed very reasonable. (And she's an INFP, so so much success.)

    I like to debate people, and I've realized most people have a reason why they're wrong that indicates something interesting about them. So I like asking them questions to try and figure out how they think.
    koalaroo and FakeLefty thanked this post.

  7. #527
    ESTJ

    Quote Originally Posted by koalaroo View Post
    Do any other ENTJs/Te-doms have difficulty not automatically correcting the factually incorrect?

    I'm trying to work on this, but I want to know if this is a me thing, or if it's type related. (Again, this doesn't mean that I shouldn't or won't work on it.)
    I was like this somewhat when I was younger. Now I view these situations in terms of costs and benefits and likely outcomes. Most times, when someone digs his or her heels in, that person does not want to open up to new information and no amount of arguing will change that person's mind. Those people are close-minded and I am not going to waste my valuable time on people who are too prideful and willfully ignorant to budge. It's their loss.

    I also find that innocent fact-checking can stir up undesirable reactions in people. I always ask myself: is this worth my time and effort? Is this worth the trouble? Oftentimes, it's just a stupid conversation about a fact.

    But a fact that is relevant to getting done what needs to be done? I will argue that hard.
    ArBell thanked this post.

  8. #528
    Unknown

    How many people on this forum think they are ENTJ but are not? Just give me an estimate in your own words.

  9. #529

    Quote Originally Posted by jkp View Post
    How many people on this forum think they are ENTJ but are not? Just give me an estimate in your own words.
    Mr Canis, EmmaN, Leviticus Cornwall and 2 others thanked this post.

  10. #530
    ENTJ

    On a related note:
    If you were another person and had a conversation with yourself on the street (for maybe five minutes), what would you type yourself as? AKA what do you think other people see you as when they first meet you?

    I'd probably get typed as an INTJ, or maybe an ENFP.


     
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