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ENTP thoughts on INFPs

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This is a discussion on ENTP thoughts on INFPs within the ENTP Forum- The Visionaries forums, part of the NT's Temperament Forum- The Intellects category; OMG. This thread has been fun to read. I am currently dating an ENTP and I like to lick her ...

  1. #51

    OMG. This thread has been fun to read.

    I am currently dating an ENTP and I like to lick her brain... well, other places too, but the sheer badarsery that is her brain is very, very sexy to me.

    Unlike other comments about some INFPs in this thread, I think I might be in the right stage of my life to enjoy this relationship.

    Quote Originally Posted by Malkovich

    I like them... from afar. It's pretty tasking to have a relationship with them, I feel like I'm walking on egg shells all the time trying not to hurt them. It's not just that they're ridiculously easily hurt, it's also that there's something about them that really makes me not want to hurt them (unlike with most people where I just shrug it off when I accidentally do, with INFPs I feel pretty bad about it). They're just too much work and stress for me, and too little mutual understanding. Sorry.
    ^This^ is oddly how I feel with those in my past relationships (ISFPs, ENFP, etc...) - having an ENTP significant other for me is actually a breath of fresh air because she has a thick skin and can call me on my shit and not stab me to death with it. The tiptoeing can be sweet, but I actually really welcome that criticism because the intent is not to harm me - it is to chew on the subject using Ne. I really appreciate that and it's the first time that I've had it in a relationship and I am having a blast.

    Quote Originally Posted by Monte
    General speaking, when you guys are being fucking awesome, you guys are being fucking awesome, but when you guys want to be annoying, sensitive fucks, you guys want to be annoying sensitive fucks.
    Shit, this made me laugh because I think this is both accurate and genuine... Gwad, I can hear my GF's voice saying this. LMAO.

    Overall, I like you guys, you make me feel a bit more human and you honestly make me feel like someone gives a shit about me. You're good brain buddies and when you're not taking a debate too seriously, you can be very entertaining. And the two I know are very good at some form of art.
    This is the weirdest thing I have had to deal with in a relationship - you guys are as bad as us INFPs when it comes to compliments. In addition, nobody seems to want to tell you guys that you are awesome. Not the superficial 'good job on that excel guide for dummies that you made it so that the rest of your workteam doesn't die trying to complete this task', but the 'you know that you are good person, right? Like smart, beautiful, sexy, and I love you.'

    My GF is often floored by this kind of acknowledgement of how she makes me feel and I think because she knows that I'm being serious, it throws her for a loop sometimes, but the look on her face is fucking priceless and I have great eyebrow-waggle game and am goofy so she doesn't get too uncomfortable with my appreciation of her.

    You all are so easy to offend, and it's always the weirdest things. We can joke about the holocaust or slavery or killing one another's grandparents because they're old anyway, but then some tiny, microscopic comment will be made and first you get quiet. I know you're thinking about it, trying to rationalize it, but it doesn't work and then next comes the question of whether or not I really believe that, I don't take your concern seriously enough, you get pissy. I'm not sure if this is just my boyfriend or what, but if he doesn't agree with something, or before he gets to know something, it's stupid. His philosophy is that something is stupid until proven otherwise, which is fucking retarded.
    Shit, this made me laugh too, but mostly at myself. It's not just him. I don't think things are stupid... just irrelevant until they become something important to me personally. You guys and gals really like conversation, but it's not the type of conversation I'm used to - there is a lot less... finesse in most of the subjects that are explored. You guys aren't searching for the meaning of life - you're searching for the meaning of everything. At once. It's fascinating, but can also be exhausting.

    I am acutely aware of how past criticism effected me and while I will dig in and plant my feet on certain subjects, I'm not going to actively close my mind to my GF's arguments because she has insights into things that matter to me more than I can imagine most of the time. I am in awe of her talent to present logical arguments - I have a quick wit when I'm writing, but not in conversation unless I know the subject REALLY well and her skill in this is something that I find strikes me as particularly amazing.

    I will, however, admit that I have rolled my eyes so hard at a shit-head comment she's made that I ran the risk of knocking myself out a few times now. But I have learned not to be offended when she is sparing and, most importantly, to talk with her about it if something is really bothering me. Otherwise, she sits there looking at me as I think about it and worries like a crazy person that she has offended me beyond belief. I have had to straight up say "This will test your patience; I need to chew on the subject for a bit and while I appreciate your concern, I am not going to self-combust just because I look like it ATM. This is just how I am about most things. I'll be fine once I work through the feels."

    I say chew because I think it is a good metaphor for her Ne-dom and my Ne-aux: ENTPs chew in public, most of the time quite loudly, and INFPs chew in private as quietly as possible. Transparency of thought is not something that comes easy to INFPs, but ENTPs seem to breath it. I can see how this could clash, but I have been careful and as openly honest as I can muster. It's been good for the both of us thus far.

    I think it has helped that I have openly asked her not to verbally spar with me unless I consent - she has others that can do that more efficiently and effectively with her so I don't feel too guilty about not giving her that back and forth dialogue somedays. Otherwise, she's starts on these subjects and I have to actively cut her off and ask if she doing this to acquire data (i.e. is she just exploring all of the things with her Ne) or is she asking me to state my fixed opinion on the matter. It prepares me for the mood required to having long philosophical conversations.

    Open Comms and carefully laid expectations with a heavy dose of physical and mental freedom has been the key thus far, methings. So far, I am having a grand time, so yeah. :3

    ...

    Also, the sex is fucking great. Like holy shit. Just thought I'd toss that in there. FYI.
    negativeforce thanked this post.


     
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