I think as a parent you can help create some structure and routines or at least not belittle the ESFJ making those for himself. Maybe make a date night once a month or something where just you and your ESFJ spend a little time together doing something fun. Positive words of encouragement, lots of hugs, asking how they're doing, being patient when they want to talk about small talk, get to know their friends, show interest in their activities, try to create a harmonious home life as much as possible, remind him that you love him no matter what / unconditionally. Remembering small things is huge! Like ask him how things are going with a friend or how he's feeling about some other aspect of his life you remembered etc.
I do think sometimes as ESFJ kids we can chase the praise or want to make our teacher or parent proud more than we really want to study for ourselves. So I think it would be nice sometimes to just be told / made to feel like we're enough just for who we are and not how much we can please others. Maybe try reinforcing asking what the ESFJ wants for himself too (even though that might be really hard for them to answer....so maybe that's not a good idea... maybe just watch out for it and see if you think he needs some space for himself without maybe realizing it). I don't know... I think it would have been good for me in high school to hit pause for a moment to really figure out what I wanted to study in college and remove pressures from parents or others on what I thought I should do, you know? It's tricky... hard to really know what "you" want to do when you feel like "you" is everyone around you...if that makes sense?
I think it's great that you're asking these questions on here! He's so lucky to have you as a mama!