[ESFP] How Do You Typically Get An ESFP's Attention?

How Do You Typically Get An ESFP's Attention?

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This is a discussion on How Do You Typically Get An ESFP's Attention? within the ESFP Forum - The Performers forums, part of the SP's Temperament Forum- The Creators category; So, whenever someone mentions ESFP, they always seem to bring up something about their need or desire for attention. Which ...

  1. #1
    INFP - The Idealists

    How Do You Typically Get An ESFP's Attention?

    So, whenever someone mentions ESFP, they always seem to bring up something about their need or desire for attention. Which made me wonder about the reverse side to that-

    How do you get an ESFP's attention?

    How do you pick your friends, what catches your interest, and what kind of people do you feel you are typically attracted to?



  2. #2

    I have a good friend who is an esfp. he is a really good guy but to someone who doesn't understand the efsp personality type he can come across as being very unintelligent. (and he is so fun to mess with it cracks me up). well he is always telling me about these girls that hit on him and flirt with him. he loves it. Basically if you dish out attention they will give it in return. and you can also try this... The girls he falls for the hardest are ones who he feels are very similar to him. Some of the girls he has fallen for have been the complete opposite of him. but because he has a few things in common with them he gets hooked and thinks he has met his soul mate. kinda comical but this does get old really fast lol. So maybe you can try to give the esfp alot of attention. learn some of the things he is interested in. and find common ground. He also likes bubbly girls with high energy so that might be a good start at getting an esfps attention aswell. not sure if this will apply to all esfps.

    As far as friends... they like people that have alot in common with them. i dont typically know what ALL esfps like, but alot like sports, people that will listen to them jabber, and people that praise them. However, I dont praise him at all lol. Im his closest friend but I dont praise him a bit. he gets enough praise from everyone else so the last person he is going to get it from is me haha. actually I tend to show him up alot of times when it comes to sports which he is not use to and does not like haha. i guess they like a friendly rivalry too. and alot of them tend to have friends that are easily able to out-whit them. Im not sure why this is because I havent studied the esfp type in depth. I do know though that they dont particularly like to be around people that are boring.
    I hope this helps.

  3. #3

    I am personally fascinated by introverted types, mostly introverted feeling types. Introverted thinking types are booooring, extraverted thinking types are too controlling, Extraverted feeling types are competition.

    My friends tend to be receptive, intelligent, and more organized than me. Often I attract the parental type, literally and figuratively. Most of my good friends tell me what to do and try to parent me. I also have a lot of friends who are twice my age and are parents of kids my age. ha That may just be me though.

    In general I like people with good hearts who are a little complex.

    I like to be the craziest, the wittiest, and the silliest.

    That is for real friends/dating. At parties though I will hang out with the other crazy people just because they are easier to get riled up.

    What catches my interest though is someone quiet and uniquely attractive that seems to have a lot going on upstairs. I like someone who is easily flustered. I enjoy the challenge of bringing someone out of their shell.
    Seamaid, Seamaid, Seamaid and 32 others thanked this post.

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  5. #4
    ENTP - The Visionaries

    Quote Originally Posted by ThatOne View Post
    How do you get an ESFP's attention?


    From what I've noticed, this is how ESFP men gets attracted. Female: vice-versa.
    Fat Bozo, Fat Bozo, Fat Bozo and 31 others thanked this post.

  6. #5
    ENTP - The Visionaries

    People who are "deep", ohboy, they catch me at once. <3 And they are not "judgmental". Or hostile. They are just as curious about life as I am.
    These people stay longer than just "hello, thank you and goodbye!" They rarely have a judgmental things in there body language.
    They have very kind eyes and look at me as a real person. <3 These people I "love" almost at once.
    I quickly notice if someone is judgmental in there attitude. I almost (compulsive) test people. Because I'm so aware of what people send out. And it is so much you can read in the body language.



    Being aware of the present moment is natural for me, and I see how many people are not aware about this small signals. It's fun to talk about such things with people when you get to know them on a deeper level.

    There are very few friends who really know me.
    I'm probably quite vulnerable.
    And people tend to believe that I am what I am sending out.


    An ESFP KNOW what she / he are sending out. And how it is perceived by most people. But what we send out, it's not always "facts"... And that is sad.. We know only that it might be good to send some signals. ..as a way to "survive"..(?)


    But. If you want to ask an ESFP how he / she are doing today (what the person REALLY thinks, feels), then you should do it private.

    This, and 1000 other factors plays a major role of course.
    But we say: if an ESFP trust you, and you are honest, you are "yourself", and do not play a badass = You have a friend for life, even unto death!
    We like secrets and is very good to keep them to ourselves as well.

    We can play like we dont know nothing, if anyone would push us about info.
    And that's one thing you might want to know!




    I love to discuss and analyze people and all sorts of behaviors. I like different opinions and I like to talk about it.
    I can talk about things and test a view. And completely without me having to stand up for such a view, hehe..even if I'm asking someone a crazy question about this or that.

    (Hmm.. Is it possible to grasp something of this ramblings, haha?)

    Ok, just to talk about things gives me pleasure. This is something many people may not know about the ESFPs. (sure, now I am old like a cave, haha, but..) I would say that this happens when an ESFP becoming more interested in some sort of strategies to achieve goals. This comes with our cooperation with our Ni.
    We become more targeted, yeeeah, at least MORE than when we were teenagers so to speak.



    Blablabla .... I want to understand why people behave as they do. And that does not mean the same thing as accepting a bad behavior. No no! I just want to understand "WHY" crazy people are crazy and so on.


    I have very often very interesting discussions with INTJ IRL. But on the internet it is not the same thing. I think is because much of my communication "is in my body." An intuitive, can easily read that stuff in a discussion, and then they understand what I'm saying.

    Sometimes an intuitive see these things more easily than another Senser type.
    Hmmm...
    Quite interesting actually.
    Glenda Gnome Starr, Figure, ThatOne and 17 others thanked this post.

  7. #6
    Unknown


    I've never actively pursued someone to date. It's always been someone else to pursue me. And looking back, every single time that's happened, it's been an ESFP in charge. I mean, last time it happened, we were stargazing on a beach while my fraternity brothers were getting smashed in the beach house. They like one-on-one bonds.

    Every time, it's started out with me making an observation that nobody else noticed, and correctly predicted what will happen next. ESFP are so energetic, I think they like calm, diplomatic, nonjudgmental people who respond to their initiatives and take them to be part of a real relationship, instead of blowing them off like other people do. The ESFP I know make it a point to stress the importance of being polite, so I think that's are important to them too.

    They also seem to like people who can give them the information they need to have before taking action, so they don't do something they don't really want to do before it's too late. TBH I usually do that anyway (usually without anyone listening to a thing I say) so it's nice that someone actually values the advice.
    ThatOne, Ryosuke93, Fridays and 15 others thanked this post.

  8. #7

    Quote Originally Posted by LXPilot View Post
    I've never actively pursued someone to date. It's always been someone else to pursue me. And looking back, every single time that's happened, it's been an ESFP in charge. I mean, last time it happened, we were stargazing on a beach while my fraternity brothers were getting smashed in the beach house. They like one-on-one bonds.

    Every time, it's started out with me making an observation that nobody else noticed, and correctly predicted what will happen next. ESFP are so energetic, I think they like calm, diplomatic, nonjudgmental people who respond to their initiatives and take them to be part of a real relationship, instead of blowing them off like other people do. The ESFP I know make it a point to stress the importance of being polite, so I think that's are important to them too.

    They also seem to like people who can give them the information they need to have before taking action, so they don't do something they don't really want to do before it's too late. TBH I usually do that anyway (usually without anyone listening to a thing I say) so it's nice that someone actually values the advice.
    Yes, yes. Spot on, spot on. We need to be taken seriously for one thing and recognized for our abilities to HAVE one on one relationships.

    I think we hate being controlled, but don't mind a little rational input every once in a while. I like J types because I think too much P can be dangerous. heh
    Seamaid, Glenda Gnome Starr, Figure and 1 others thanked this post.

  9. #8
    ISTP - The Mechanics

    Quote Originally Posted by INFJjediwarrior View Post
    bubbly girls with high energy
    Basically ya.
    High energy.
    Bubbly girls help too ;)
    ThatOne thanked this post.

  10. #9
    INFP - The Idealists

    @INFJjediwarrior

    Yeep I know the feeling XD Particularly when it comes to considering them unintelligent. The ESFP I know, I think because he comes across as so... hyperactive and distracted, in a way, that people underestimate how smart he really is.
    @roastingmallows

    A couple of questions- How are Extroverted Feeling types competition? And that's another thing I don't get- I've heard some ESFPs say they find shy people boring, yet others say they enjoy trying to "bring someone out of their shell." Is there a difference?

    @Fridays

    How would you "test" somone to see how judgemental they are? And completely unrelated (well, almost) those smilies are adorable.
    Fridays and roastingmallows thanked this post.

  11. #10
    ENTP - The Visionaries

    Quote Originally Posted by ThatOne View Post
    @Fridays

    How would you "test" somone to see how judgemental they are?
    I can't give that away!! ( ? ) Haha!
    ThatOne thanked this post.


     
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