I had posted this a few months ago on the ISFJ forum, however I didnt get as much feedback as I would have liked, so I thought I would post it here too! :)
This is directed at any other Male ISFJ's on this forum, or any female ESFP's that have been in this situation...
Have any of you ever been in relationships with a female ESFP/male ISFJ? I, for one have been in relationships with more than one Female ESFP and neither of them have worked out. I've always felt like female ESFPs have been drawn to me, although I'm not quite sure why.
At first, I always seem to connect magnificantly with the female esfp.
There warm, bubbly, fun loving personality usually puts me at ease and really helps me be myself, and at first I really find myself enjoying spending time with the ESFP and generally connecting wonderfully on an emotional level.
But ofcourse, as time goes on, it always becomes more and more apparant that things arent going to work out. I become to needy, paranoid, controlling and serious. Especially if the ESFP I'm in a relationship with likes to flirt a bit with other guys. ESFPs like to be spontanious and ISFJs like to plan, that is usually another problem.
I have also found that ESFPs cannot take the slightest bit of criticism.
Even if its constructive they view it as a personal attack on their character, there emotional outburts are really hard to deal with.
Although being an ISFJ, I am also guilty of outbursts of anger.
I'm just wondering if there are any other Male ISFJs out there that have been in relationships, or have found themselves drawn to Female ESFPs. Or anyone who can help shed some light on to why things just didn't work out.
I get on really well with a healthy ESFP and I was wondering if there is anything I can do to make a relationship with them WORK?!
What's the secret to making a healthy female ESFP happy?