This is an attitude I've noticed is rather common and unique to generation Y. Maybe I just believe everything older people tell me and get all my impressions of past generations from novels, but it seems that this kind of adult-delay didn't really occur before. As though in the past, you simply come of age and are expected to assume the appropriate behavior and responsibilities of an adult, no complaints.
Now, I see it everywhere: jokes about how twentysomethings "fail at being an adult", hate doing practical "grownup" things, don't behave what would typically be seen as "maturely" - it seems to not only be prevalent, but something looked on with amusement. Why? What caused this trend? Or have I just been reading too many Buzzfeed listicles to pass the time and it's not actually that common?
Growing up in this period is strange. Things happen later for most, especially me. I could not wait to exercise the responsibilities as an adult with full freedoms entailed to that title. But family hinders that, especially helicopter parents who restrict freedom to make mistakes for fear that their children might learn something without their direct influence. I have a helicopter mom, I hated it and I hate her. But I'm living in her house currently, so you can see how that doesn't bode well for me. The economy is a hindrance, so is the mounting debt resulting from the rising cost of college. The job market is ridiculous, with some being able to get jobs and some who can't, even though they are more than qualified. Racial tension is at an all time high, and despite all this free information ignorance seems to be an invaluable commodity. The celebrity-obsessed culture is stultifying and gross.
Millennials have faced circumstances that make life with it's hardships significantly harder. It's hard to find a job, even a mindless one. It's harder to connect with people. It's harder to find people to mesh with because everyone is interested in shallow things. And the older generation won't die already, particularly Baby-Boomers. Non-existent god, they reigned in the job market for over 3 decades, now are taking up taxes with their disabilities and illnesses. My mom is a leech off the state now, due to her being 'disabled' from her job. She's fine, she just hated working.
Some members of gen-Y have to bear brunt of the responsibilities and indignities that come with adulthood, with none of the accompanying benefits or respect.
When education can be extended well into a person's 20s or 30s, when good jobs are scarce and unstable, when marriage is no longer what legitimizes a sexual relationship, all the markers of adulthood become fuzzy and gray. Maybe people fail at what used to be considered adulthood, but today it is not at all clear what makes a person an adult.
What does it really mean to be an adult today? Individual independence? Taking responsibility for your own actions and choices? Meeting social expectations? I'm interested to hear people's thoughts.
I think financial independence is a reliable indicator of what makes a person an adult. Children rely on their parents for all of their financial needs, so until you're living on your own and paying your own bills, I think it's hard to be an adult.
Maybe before internet and video games, everyday life was so banal shit boring that getting ton of time wasting activities like work was a sort of a relief.
If Generation Y was the first generation to feel like this en masse, I think Generation Z was probably the first generation to see people older than them having this attitude. I mean, I would be an example, because all throughout my adolescence, I had this belief that my best days were already behind me.
Honestly what do you define as a grown up? If I look at my parents, yes they are good at taking care of a family, have stability and a regular income, but when it comes to questioning yourself, no one is in for it but my sister and I. I am going back to study while so many people (including my parents) tell me I am old and maybe it's not wise and such. Well I prefer to do it than regretting it. I think being able to be honest with yourself about what you want and taking action for it is more of a grown up attitude than anything else and age doesn't matter then. You will find tons of people in every generations that like to whine about whatever they can find but not lift a finger and then Gen Z super ready to take things into their own hands. I have more respect for the latter
I remember reading somewhere that millennials more than any other generation grew up with helicopter parents and the whole fad of attachment parenting. I was even one of those kids that was raised by a financially privileged but extremely paranoid parent.
I think everyone's situation is different. I know I always wanted to distance myself from my mother and my family (my home environment was toxic), but was never allowed. I wasn't allowed to work while I was in high school because my mother wanted me to concentrate on my studies. I wasn't allowed to date at that time either for the same reasons. I tried leaving home at the age of 16. I spoke with a counsellor at school, informed him of the toxic environment I was growing up in, and did what I could to try to get the support to move out of home. My mother wouldn't let me. She didn't want me living in residential care (and she was absolutely right - I've seen those places, they are NOT somewhere you want to end up) and would only allow me to leave home if I lived with one of my aunts. So I did. Which was an even worse mistake, and a far more toxic environment.
Even though I can look back on those events now and think: I can see why my mother did everything that she did, I still wonder what my life would have been like if she had just let me leave the nest a little earlier than usual and nut my way through life. By the time I was 18 and legally allowed to leave, I was so ill-prepared and so deep in depression that there was no way I was able to launch myself out into the world. I'd never had a job, never figured out how to manage finances, and had lost all motivation or want to make something of myself.
As a result of this, of getting too comfortable in my surroundings, I have definitely delayed "growing up". I mean, I work full-time and live with housemates, pay my own way (most of the time - minimum wage is a fucking joke to try and live on) and make my own decisions as best I can. But it's taken me a while to launch. And not because I didn't want to, but because I was held back. The thing is, it can be cyclical. It's up to us (Generation Y and all that follows) to break these cycles. Maybe the future generation of children will grow up knowing what hard work means because their own parents had to learn it the hard way. It's trial and error, figuring out what works best, but also doing what you can to survive through whatever society is going through at the time, too.
My next thought is: after Generation Z, what comes next? We're running out of letters of the alphabet!
Personally I don't hate being a grown up at all. Actually I had never given it any thought until now...and it still doesn't bother me at all.
It's just the normal course of events, now I'm a grown up, eventually I'll be old and so what? I really don't care, what matters is what I'm doing with my life, not the age at which I'm doing it.
Well millenials have not become adults like we were suppose to thanks to the economy. Everything we were suppose to be able to do like date, get a decent paying job, have a family was all very much delayed. A lot of people finished college and could not find work and so moved home with parents, a lot of people could not move out of parents becuase they were not making enough to support themselves and thier jobs were only seasonal so couldnt keep a job for 6 months straight. So in a way adulthood and al the joys that come with it were delayed and only people who prepared for it early were able to survive the economic crash. In reality this has become the generation that doesnt get to be adults till later 20s early 30s and that itself is just terrible. I could see why being an "Adult" without any of the privlages of being one would be seen as annoying vs being a child with all the rights of a child. Not to mention how many people auctually cant drive in this generation anymore. Most people cant drive or afford cars, having a driver liscense is becoming more rare. When you have to beg for a job at mcdonalds flipping burgers since the compitition for such a shitty job is so high that is not very good. When you look at someone and say "They are lucky to flip burgers" You know your life sucks. Then Y generation is being treated like crap for the bad economy by older gens who assume things work exactly the same as it did before, even though we been in the toilet for awhile.
People used to be able move out and 'assume the responsibilites of an adult', it's hard to be an adult these days or to like being an adult when you are an unemployed graduate with a part time job at McDonalds. People used to get a job easily after they graduated and have enough money to buy a house and raise children early and this is just getting increasing harder now.
I'm only 17 years of age at the moment, however with only eight months until I am a legal adult, I can somewhat relate to the feeling of not wanting to be a "grownup". Personally, I am dreading turning 18 next year and as a result, I am trying to cherish every single moment I have of being under-18. I just feel as though I am not "ready" to become a legal adult. Admittedly, I still enjoy just catching up with my friends and even going to school. I don't want to be worrying about taxes, bills and finances just yet.
Since most people, cant finds a job, or support themselves on their income. So its kind of hard to be happy about the fact you have no life and working a job all day and still cant make rent.
I try not to let myself compare my age to every situation, but it is hard. Sometimes I think I'm pretty awesome and know more than I'm "expected" to at my age. Other times I'm embarrassed that I don't know something a teenager knows, or just something that my peers seem to think is obvious. But it's kind of both; we all have different experiences and my experiences don't define me. I just do my best at whatever adult thing I learn next and try not to care about whether or not I look foolish.
I was brought here by a post about young people wanting to be older and the power of not rushing things. For some reason, I felt shaded even though I'm the exact opposite.When I read about bratty kids, I feel shaded because I still feel like I'm in my early teens. I haven't wanted to grow up ever since my early teens, but looking back, living an emotionally stunting life all the way till my late teens was the true reason for my unhappiness, so this attitude of mine is illogical.
Most Millennials I know that are my age work over 40 hours a week and yet still can't afford to live properly. But oh please go on about how we're oh so entitled... /Sarc
the whole "all Millennials are entitled" crap is just Baby Boomers (and even some Xers) to gaslight us into feeling like we're selfish for expecting a decent standard of living that our parents were able to have when they finished school.
The cost of living these days is exceptionally high. It is so hard to have a decent standard of living. If anyone, regardless of generation, calls an entire generation of people "entitled" or any other unflattering label, well, that's just rude.
Ugh i'm not even apart of that generation and i want to be a little kid again.. I'm only 12 and i'm going to be 13 in February. I wish i had a time machine so i could relive being 5 years old
I am slowly reaching the "I am completely on my own part" and I can't wait... I guess the worst thing about being a grown up is having money problems. But it is okay, just don't take out a loan that you can't repay...
This reminds me of some edgy question on Quora I asked which went like, "Do you believe that child murderers did their victims a favor by not letting them grow old and angsty?" I had to edit it out because of the BNBR I got. At this point, Quora was on to me and my edgy questions. I know that that it's only out of edge that I have this mentality of believing what I said in my question, but you could tell that I had a childhood which made me feel normal and a life past childhood which made me feel abnormal.
BTW, what would y'all think if you stumbled upon it on Quora or Yahoo! Answers? You see, I want to get that question out of my system, but I want to spare myself the humiliation of all the pearl-clutching but deserved answers.
I like being an adult. I don't make that much money but it still beats having less autonomy. Also it probably helps that I grew up a little on the poor side so I'm used to living like this anyway.
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