How Do You Tease Apart 3w4 from 4w3

I took a few online tests that generally gave me results that put 3 and 4 about even (sometimes 4 came out on top, and sometimes 3 did) and 7 just a few points below. Although online tests aren't always the most accurate, I'm going to go ahead and assume that this means that I'm either a 4w3 or a 3w4. I thought I was a 4w3 because when I read the description it seemed to perfectly describe me, but when I started reading posts in the Type 4 forum on here I sort of felt like...I don't identify with all of that. This post is making me feel like maybe I'm a 3w4 instead? Unless I'm in denial about feeling like a special snowflake. But it seems like a lot of people bring up the fact that type 4s are very focused on their negative emotions and their own personal dramas, and while I'm not going to deny that I do get really emotional at times, I feel like my focus is much more oriented on the positive (at least, I try to focus on the positive! I don't like dwelling on sadness or insecurity, whether or not the two do come my way)

So I'm kind of bumping this post and hoping that some of you who know more about enneagram can maybe differentiate a little bit more between 4w3 and 3w4. Because I am so, so lost.

After reading all this thread my notions of how to differenciate a 2w3 from a 3w2 and a 4w3 from a 3w4 have totally messed.
I thought that the most important clue for differenciate 3s from 2s or 4s was the emotiveness. I mean, as I used to understand, 4s and 2s are very prone to feel more or less intensily (4s use to feel being withdrawn and 2s use to express feelings more openly).
I mean, I don't see a 3 being emotive unless it is part of some performance or because showing emotions are part of the image they want to give.
I thought they were the "unfeeling type of the three feeling types"
Am I wrong?
Can a 3 type be loving and affective?

I'm wondering this myself. I always considered myself a 4w3 but I might actually be a 3w4. Hard to tell. I agree the motivations behind behaviour is more important than specific behaviour itself when it comes to typing but I'm still unsure what the motivations between the two types are exactly and how they differ. Three's fear being worthless but four's indulge in their feelings of worthlessness.. It's almost like they take the opposite approach to the same thing. Also I have no idea how this all translates to a healthy personality. Since a healthy personality wouldn't have problems with self-worth in the first place.

Originally Posted by Pinkeyed

After reading all this thread my notions of how to differenciate a 2w3 from a 3w2 and a 4w3 from a 3w4 have totally messed.
I thought that the most important clue for differenciate 3s from 2s or 4s was the emotiveness. I mean, as I used to understand, 4s and 2s are very prone to feel more or less intensily (4s use to feel being withdrawn and 2s use to express feelings more openly).
I mean, I don't see a 3 being emotive unless it is part of some performance or because showing emotions are part of the image they want to give.
I thought they were the "unfeeling type of the three feeling types"
Am I wrong?
Can a 3 type be loving and affective?

Any type can be loving and affectionate and any type can be dramatic and emotional. It's not dependent upon type. Only that certain motivations tend to correlate with certain behaviours more readily than others.

Originally Posted by devono

not to be flip, but: one of the differences between a 3w4 and a 4w3 is that a 3w4 has a job. like, an actual job. that pays money.

3w4s are far more concerned with glory and 'bona fide'ness than 4w3s, IMO. 4w3s just want to be the smartest, sexiest, and most beautiful in the room. if you're all of those things you won't need a job because someone will come rescue you and take you away from all that. then you'll (4w3) be at your best because you won't be competing with anyone- a great friend and confidant, loving and wonderful. competition makes you ugly.

3w4s want glory. they feel like frauds, and even though they hate it, they thrive on it. 4w3s never feel like frauds. Only like special-needs children sometimes.

Not to like necro this thread, but this shit made me laugh so hard.
And somehow it even helped me clear up some of my own confusion.