[INFJ] Emotional Constipation

Emotional Constipation

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This is a discussion on Emotional Constipation within the INFJ Forum - The Protectors forums, part of the NF's Temperament Forum- The Dreamers category; I, for one can be an expressive person, but I don't overly express myself in public a lot of the ...

  1. #1
    ISTP

    Emotional Constipation

    I, for one can be an expressive person, but I don't overly express myself in public a lot of the time (compared to Fe-Doms, and due to the fact that I am also pretty much in my head and analysing/observting things more than I am expressing myself/socialising with the people in my environment.

    That being said, I can easily absorb all the emotions within the room and can also know how to impact/influence the atmosphere within the room. But when I pretend to be super stoic and not let any of my emotions out/impact the environment, I become emotionally constipated. Everything builds up inside me easily and then when I eventually give up and let it all out, I become a hellish hurricane of expression that no-one wants to be around.

    It can take me a few hours to revert back to my usual, calm self. The imbalance makes me very off-centered both inside and out. I forget where I am, and what's going on inside my mind. I find it hard to concentrate and go back into the state of mind that I was previously in.

    Do any of you relate? If so, how can I just let myself be more comfortable expressing myself at the given time, without coming across as vulnerable/feminine? I don't mind doing it because it comes naturally, but I don't want to come across as a 'drama queen' or someone who's seeking attention, when I'm really not. I want to interact with the environment, and I also want to interact with the people and read them better.



  2. #2

    Quote Originally Posted by VirtualInsanity View Post
    I, for one can be an expressive person, but I don't overly express myself in public a lot of the time (compared to Fe-Doms, and due to the fact that I am also pretty much in my head and analysing/observting things more than I am expressing myself/socialising with the people in my environment.

    That being said, I can easily absorb all the emotions within the room and can also know how to impact/influence the atmosphere within the room. But when I pretend to be super stoic and not let any of my emotions out/impact the environment, I become emotionally constipated. Everything builds up inside me easily and then when I eventually give up and let it all out, I become a hellish hurricane of expression that no-one wants to be around.

    It can take me a few hours to revert back to my usual, calm self. The imbalance makes me very off-centered both inside and out. I forget where I am, and what's going on inside my mind. I find it hard to concentrate and go back into the state of mind that I was previously in.

    Do any of you relate? If so, how can I just let myself be more comfortable expressing myself at the given time, without coming across as vulnerable/feminine? I don't mind doing it because it comes naturally, but I don't want to come across as a 'drama queen' or someone who's seeking attention, when I'm really not. I want to interact with the environment, and I also want to interact with the people and read them better.
    You can do it by practicing daily with dark humor. Start with a smaller crowd of people that know you well enough to forgive anything that comes out of your mouth. The trick of successfully employing dark humor is to make sure that everyone can laugh. For example you wouldn't want to publicly make any members of the group feel themselves the brunt of the joke.

    Another way you could do this is to experiment with dark humor when no women are present. For example a group of guys gathered at a tavern will be expecting to have their balls broken because this the natural way in which men bond. Find out what makes them laugh and what doesn't, practice at it and eventually it will become second nature.

  3. #3
    ISTP

    Quote Originally Posted by Shroom View Post
    You can do it by practicing daily with dark humor. Start with a smaller crowd of people that know you well enough to forgive anything that comes out of your mouth. The trick of successfully employing dark humor is to make sure that everyone can laugh. For example you wouldn't want to publicly make any members of the group feel themselves the brunt of the joke.

    Another way you could do this is to experiment with dark humor when no women are present. For example a group of guys gathered at a tavern will be expecting to have their balls broken because this the natural way in which men bond. Find out what makes them laugh and what doesn't, practice at it and eventually it will become second nature.
    That sounds interesting. Anything else?

    Sent from my SM-A520F using Tapatalk


 

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