[INFJ] Should we be friends? (mid 30s, Married INFJ/f, Single INTJ/m) - Page 3

Should we be friends? (mid 30s, Married INFJ/f, Single INTJ/m)

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This is a discussion on Should we be friends? (mid 30s, Married INFJ/f, Single INTJ/m) within the INFJ Forum - The Protectors forums, part of the NF's Temperament Forum- The Dreamers category; Originally Posted by Sour Roses That's all I remember of the song too Can't lie, if I was a mouse/rat ...

  1. #21

    Quote Originally Posted by Sour Roses View Post
    That's all I remember of the song too

    Can't lie, if I was a mouse/rat being experimented on in a lab, I'd probably become obsessed with taking over the world from humans too! It's all his machinations, I think, that reveal the Brain as an INTJ... no one else could come up with so many highly detailed plans for world domination
    Oh yeah he wanted to take over the world!! Yes, INTJ. Oooor ENTJ, they plot taking over the world too. Just not secretly. So precious.

    Quote Originally Posted by Green Girl View Post


    One is a genius, the other's insane. But which is which? Pinky's ideas work more often than Brain's.

    I like to think of them as functions. Pinky is Se all the way, Brain is Te. If you combined them in a crazy lab experiment, they could take over the world!
    This clip makes me smile, thank you. :)
    Green Girl and Sour Roses thanked this post.

  2. #22
    INFJ

    I know women who have healthy equal friendships with men - some women with some men - it wouldn't be possible for everyone. It has never been possible for me.

  3. #23

    Okay, so I'm married, I am pretty good friends with a male INTJ and I have other very close male friends.

    Here are some pointers if you go through with it:
    1. The INTJ I know is often careful to keep a certain level of distance. He likes to discuss theories and creative projects with me, but often refers to me as his brother's friend or other types of distancing language. I would suggest accepting this and not trying to push much further as long as you get the Ni connection you're looking for it can be nice.
    2. Obviously being super open with your husband helps
    3. I'm asexual so I don't totally know how to get around the 'attraction' aspect of things but I find not worrying about it makes everything better. The more you worry about it the more it feels like 'something' is going on and if you don't even assume that 'something' could be going on it tends to not in my experience.
    4. Be really vigilant about not getting possessive over the INTJs relationship with other girls. That's a huge potential pitfall, if you don't WANT him to get a girlfriend or you feel threatened by it in any way that's a HUGE red flag and you should immediately rethink your motives and take a step back. INTJs aren't super open with their relationships or feelings so this probably won't help, but with my male ENTP friend it really helps that he talks to me about his dating life like I'm any friend so it feels natural that we're friends and no one is secretly holding out for anything else. If he hid it from me it would feel more like he's trying not to close doors or something.

    I hope these make sense
    Kirjuri, Paper Shade, wonderfoollife and 1 others thanked this post.

  4. #24
    INFJ

    Introverts want meaningful friendships where both parties feel comfortable with who they are that they can have deep conversations, behave naturally and heart to heart every now and then. When they get it they be like "Is this guy in love with me?"
    wonderfoollife thanked this post.

  5. #25

    No way! Friends in a group is fine. Casual friends. But keep your distance. Watch the YouTube videos “guys and girls can’t be friends “.

  6. #26
    INFP

    If you are asking the question then my guess is you know the answer is no but you want to be convinced otherwise.

  7. #27

    I just read your first post. Just be casual friends with him in class. Keep a distance. Mention your husband in conversation. If you think an INTJ likes you, then they do. They are very selective too. Observing you from a distance could help Gary to see what he would like in a future potential life partner. But I’m assuming you don’t want to ruin your marriage. So be safe.
    wonderfoollife thanked this post.

  8. #28

    Quote Originally Posted by Lord Pixel View Post
    If you are asking the question then my guess is you know the answer is no but you want to be convinced otherwise.
    I got the same vibe.

    And in my experience, I had a huge “just friends” emotional connection once and it didn’t work out good for either of us.
    L P thanked this post.

  9. #29

    Your an INFJ... if you feel the inclination to ask a question such as this, you're probably right that it's not legit "friendship" vibes coming from him. I think you just need to give more credence to your gut instinct m'dear.

    On a side note I'm pretty new around here... what is all this sx dom sp stuffages going on around here... I'm baffled


     
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