[INFJ] INFJs: Do you find you have a lot in common with each other?

INFJs: Do you find you have a lot in common with each other?

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This is a discussion on INFJs: Do you find you have a lot in common with each other? within the INFJ Forum - The Protectors forums, part of the NF's Temperament Forum- The Dreamers category; Of all the personality types I'd consider myself to be fairly familiar with, INFJs seem to me to be the ...

  1. #1

    INFJs: Do you find you have a lot in common with each other?

    Of all the personality types I'd consider myself to be fairly familiar with, INFJs seem to me to be the most diverse and have the least in common with each other. Learning someone is an INFJ is often very surprising for me, because they are almost nothing like the other INFJs I know. It's only in their style of communication and what I perceive to be their common flaws that I sometimes notice patterns and similarities.

    So, INFJs: from your dealings with other INFJs, would you say you have a lot in common with each other? Do you perhaps communicate with and identify each other through some secret INFJ code that is specifically designed to be unfathomable to INTPs, but really obvious to you?



  2. #2

    Yes and no, it is difficult to explain, I know and feel different but I do also identify in some ways. We all have a very similar common "base" but that is probably about all that is extremely similar. Because we are mainly dominated by our values, beliefs and the things that we are individually into and think on.

  3. #3
    INFP - The Idealists

    Yes, just from the type of language and writing style I see, I definetly feel almost at home. Like, you have a group of people who can finally understand you and you can feel more accepted. You definetly can tell the difference once you step into the INfj forum, that theres a lot of people just like you. It's almost creepy but yet, refreshing.

    Now, out in public, when I pretended a lot of times to be an Estx/Esfx/Entj in nature, I'd come across people who I began to suspect to be an infj and even though I wanted to hide it so much, I couldn't help but to have an underlining respect for them or I could identify with them. Basically, I'd try to hide my Infjness and wanted to seperate myself from them as much as possible, so my infjness wouldn't end up coming out but I still couldn't help having respect for the individual.

    Now, I think "if your an infj and can't relate to another infj on some level, you must really not be an Infj."

    One thing to keep mind is: everyone is an individual and personality type is really just the basic skeletal system of an indivdual's personality. People can hide or misrepresent themselves and therefore, it would seem as though you couldn't relate. I think the longer you begin to know an/or are introduce to an individual, the better chances of you realizing your like them on some level. Infj's are know to shapeshift and maybe, some think their not like another but that's just because they only know them rather sparingly. they/you only see one dimenson of a three-dimensional being.
    ohTOMICho, Vivid Melody, emerald sea and 2 others thanked this post.

  4. #4
    INFJ - The Protectors


    I don't feel all that similar to the other INFJs on the forum.
    I actually often have to filter what I say to avoid other INFJs thinking that I'm troll or a complete weirdo.

    I've only met one INFJ in real life, and I had a lot in common with her. I always felt a strong connection to her, even though we barely ever talked. Before, I didn't know about MBTI types and didn't realize that the reason I felt so connected to her was because she was like the only INFJ I ever met.

    When I started out on these MBTI websites, I was hoping that I'd feel the same special connection with other INFJs... Nope!
    But perhaps that is because we're all kind of holding themselves back in our writing. In my opinion, INFJs are spending too much time trying to be friendly and warm in conversation, rather than expressing themselves as individuals.
    Sparky, Intricate Mystic, ertertwert and 12 others thanked this post.

  5. #5

    @SilentKnight44750
    @Horseshoe

    I've noticed the desire to act extraverted is very common in INFJs, at least the ones I know personally. They have a need to reach out to people and do sociable things they feel are expected of them, but anyone who really knows them can see just how draining this is for them and how unnatural it really is.
    darksoul, Azure Bass, ohTOMICho and 12 others thanked this post.

  6. #6
    ESTJ

    I feel like there are a lot of similarities between me and other INFJs. I get where they're coming from. But we are a diverse bunch, so I don't always see eye to eye.
    ohTOMICho, emerald sea and petite libellule thanked this post.

  7. #7
    INFP - The Idealists

    Quote Originally Posted by Kestrel View Post
    @SilentKnight44750
    @Horseshoe

    I've noticed the desire to act extraverted is very common in INFJs, at least the ones I know personally. They have a need to reach out to people and do sociable things they feel are expected of them, but anyone who really knows them can see just how draining this is for them and how unnatural it really is.
    Yea true, I think though most of us infj males want to hide the Fe if anything. I don't have a problem with being introverted. But, I think it's that soft, sensitive, and femine like stereotype we want to shake off or not reveal or maybe, in some social situations around certain people, we want to op for the Se/Si for our NI.. Which, is definetly true when being with women, in more casual situations. The combination of our NI, Fe puts us in more friendzones that we care to accept.


    Quote Originally Posted by Horseshoe View Post
    I don't feel all that similar to the other INFJs on the forum.
    I actually often have to filter what I say to avoid other INFJs thinking that I'm troll or a complete weirdo.

    I've only met one INFJ in real life, and I had a lot in common with her. I always felt a strong connection to her, even though we barely ever talked. Before, I didn't know about MBTI types and didn't realize that the reason I felt so connected to her was because she was like the only INFJ I ever met.

    When I started out on these MBTI websites, I was hoping that I'd feel the same special connection with other INFJs... Nope!
    But perhaps that is because we're all kind of holding themselves back in our writing. In my opinion, INFJs are spending too much time trying to be friendly and warm in conversation, rather than expressing themselves as individuals.
    Yeah, noticed this aswell, I think this may be dependant on how comfortable or how far someone has come to grips with who they are and how accepted they feel by the majority of the forum.
    Azure Bass, ohTOMICho, emerald sea and 2 others thanked this post.

  8. #8

    at the core, yes, and it is comforting to be around people who think much the same as i do. beyond the core, it depends on the person...it's easier to identify with some than with others, but i still care about everyone.

    edit ~ just saw @Humilis Curator 's post:

    We all have a very similar common "base" but that is probably about all that is extremely similar. Because we are mainly dominated by our values, beliefs and the things that we are individually into and think on.
    very true!
    Humilis Curator, ohTOMICho and SilverMoon thanked this post.

  9. #9
    INFJ - The Protectors

    Quote Originally Posted by Kestrel View Post
    @SilentKnight44750
    @Horseshoe

    I've noticed the desire to act extraverted is very common in INFJs, at least the ones I know personally. They have a need to reach out to people and do sociable things they feel are expected of them, but anyone who really knows them can see just how draining this is for them and how unnatural it really is.
    I feel this is accurate. In my personal life growing up, it was a real stresser not being social. My father was extremely social and couldn't understand why I was the way that I am. I've struggled to be more social in recent years and made a lot of headway in that direction after studying group interactions with the intent of fitting in, just to see if I could. I no longer think I have a serious problem talking to anyone now, but I find it's less psychologically taxing being around people who are also introverted.
    SilverMoon, emerald sea, Geai and 1 others thanked this post.

  10. #10
    INFJ - The Protectors

    Yes and then a big NO. lol...

    I often feel I don't belong to this community. I've often thought of leaving it many times because it's honestly hard to relate to many members on here or have that "connection" that binds me close enough. I blame it on the internet somewhat. Physical contact and enjoying all the facial expressions and feeling of energy is lacked here. You can only draw so much power from typed words. Sometimes I wish to just "lurk" but somehow I always just find a post I wish to say something and then leave it. I feel like a "player" when it comes to this forum, I make my posts but find it hard to have those "deep" connections with others. Some of that is the fact I hate to read "alot" and I skip so many probably wonderful posts and miss out on a lot of possible connection due to me being me. Makes me feel guilty sometimes because I'm not there on a level I "should" in theory be to help others. Sometimes due to my own lack of experience (pertaining to the relationship threads, which there are tons of) other lack of experience is honestly with life itself, I haven't experienced many of the things people have talked about and therefor can not relate either.


     
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