[INFP] How to deal with the enviousness?

How to deal with the enviousness?

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This is a discussion on How to deal with the enviousness? within the INFP Forum - The Idealists forums, part of the NF's Temperament Forum- The Dreamers category; Hello, I am most probably an INFP, enneagram type 4w3, not so smart... I sometimes open my facebook and all ...

  1. #1

    How to deal with the enviousness?

    Hello, I am most probably an INFP, enneagram type 4w3, not so smart...


    I sometimes open my facebook and all I see is, my cocky friends showing off their accolades. (This is the feeling I get, I actually think I might be the wrong one here, feeling sad about myself)

    How do I deal with this?

    This is something I just can't take it. It brutally hits my tiny ego. Knowing that there are certain limits that I can't surpass as they could. Or probably my wasting of time.

    I feel depressed.



  2. #2
    INFJ

    I thought we all knew Facebook was bullshit. I'll tell you what I tell my sister, who is also a 4 and struggles with the exact same thing. Delete your Facebook if it affects you that negatively. You can live without it. I do.

  3. #3

    Quote Originally Posted by AnneM View Post
    I thought we all knew Facebook was bullshit. I'll tell you what I tell my sister, who is also a 4 and struggles with the exact same thing. Delete your Facebook if it affects you that negatively. You can live without it. I do.
    But won't you feel sad, that part where you invested your time... there are some memories there, that free cloud storage, all deleted *woosh*
    AnneM thanked this post.

  4. #4
    INFJ

    Quote Originally Posted by pessimistic kid View Post
    But won't you feel sad, that part where you invested your time... there are some memories there, that free cloud storage, all deleted *woosh*
    Not gonna lie. That was really, really hard for me. Because I had posted so many precious things about my first child. Memories, photos. But, in the end, my mental health was more important to me. You'll get over it.
    pessimistic kid and Im FiNe thanked this post.

  5. #5

    Quote Originally Posted by AnneM View Post
    Not gonna lie. That was really, really hard for me. Because I had posted so many precious things about my first child. Memories, photos. But, in the end, my mental health was more important to me. You'll get over it.
    Well I can leave ie not logging in again(for a long time)...But before that I will unfriend and block all those who didn't wave me back! >:)
    AnneM thanked this post.

  6. #6
    INFJ

    Quote Originally Posted by pessimistic kid View Post
    Well I can leave ie not logging in again(for a long time)...But before that I will unfriend and block all those who didn't wave me back! >:)
    See, I couldn't trust myself to do that. Not log in, I mean. I had to actually delete the account. They really make you hunt for that option, too.
    pessimistic kid thanked this post.

  7. #7

    Wait. Why do you say they are cocky? Surely people have a right to share good news. I’m not trying to be mean but if you feel this way about a Facebook post you will feel this way offline too.

    What do you want to do that you have not done? You don’t need a brilliant intellect to volunteer at a shelter, read to preschoolers, visit a nursing home, clean up a park. Really you don’t.

    Feel better about yourself and this envy will go away.
    pessimistic kid thanked this post.

  8. #8

    Acknowledge it, and find ways to improve yourself in the way(s) that you want. If you can find that satisfaction, it won't really matter anymore what others have accomplished. In fact, you'll probably then be able to be genuinely 'happy' for their achievements.
    pessimistic kid and Blue Flower thanked this post.

  9. #9

    How is people talking about their achievements cocky? If they are explicitly coming to you and bragging and being poor friends otherwise, that's more a case, but there's nothing wrong with being proud of your work and life that you are cultivating for yourself.

    I third @Blue Flower and @BenevolentBitterBleeding . You need to focus on yourself and your goals and your aspirations and your happiness. Then, you will find that you aren't envious of others' joy, because you yourself are joyful.
    pessimistic kid and Blue Flower thanked this post.

  10. #10
    INFJ

    I think he does have a point, though. It seems like many, many people misrepresent themselves on social media. Physically and accomplishment-wise. There's a lot left out in what people choose to share. For instance, most people who post about parenting tend to post the cute moments, the neat crafts they did, precious photos, wacky adventures. They leave out all the despair, all the nitty-gritty. So, if you're a person who's feeling poorly about her parenting, this can really send you off the deep-end, if you're not actively telling yourself that people aren't telling the whole truth about their lives.
    twirler thanked this post.


     
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