[INFP] Love love love. Oh, love you're a crock of shi...... - Page 3

Love love love. Oh, love you're a crock of shi......

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This is a discussion on Love love love. Oh, love you're a crock of shi...... within the INFP Forum - The Idealists forums, part of the NF's Temperament Forum- The Dreamers category; Originally Posted by jinamuro I'm starting to think this would be a good hook up thread. We all got lots ...

  1. #21
    INFP - The Idealists

    Quote Originally Posted by jinamuro View Post
    I'm starting to think this would be a good hook up thread. We all got lots of love to give to each other!

    ha! except for the fact that i've likely got 15 years or more on most of the ladies responding here :P

  2. #22
    INFP - The Idealists

    Quote Originally Posted by SVALP View Post
    To quote some character from a certain TV show...

    "No matter how close two persons are, a world of difference separates them".

    Sorry to be a downer, but the level of connection you want is certainly too much to ask. We're complex. Extremely complex. We can't share every tiny little bit of our soul, of our essence, with anybody else. Another person can only know as so much. They only know what we reveal to them (whether directly or indirectly). There will always be something from deep inside our core that we will keep from someone else, however big that fraction is; something that will keep them from truly "getting us". Even if that wasn't the case, and there was a way to truly open up completely to someone else, to let them stare directly into our very soul... chances are, they will find something that they "won't get", something that they won't understand.

    No person in a relationship can even be sure at a 100% that their significant other loves them. If we can't even be completely sure of something as basic as that, how can we hope for a deeper level of understanding and of a connection? Using the example you mentioned about that song, maybe that person sees a deeper meaning in it than most people; but what if it differs completely from yours? And more importantly, how would you, or them, ever know exactly what significance that songs holds for the other person, and how it makes them feel?

    When it comes down to it, we're all alone in this that we call life. No one can truly "get us". We can find likeminded people, people who have a similar way of seeing things as us, people with the same values, and so on. But such a deep level of connection is an ideal. And, like all ideals, unrealizable. We're the only people who can truly get us. Crap, sometimes even if that seems difficult! Who can say they get themselves completely, all the time, with no exceptions? Certainly not me :p
    This is true. We never will be able to see things completely through the eyes of others, but what we can do is understand the way something makes someone feel. I may not love horses like my wife does, but I can understand how they make her feel. I can relate to it because there are things in my life I feel the same way for. So, all I can do is affirm her love for horses.

    Same goes for feeling love towards someone. I might not fully understand the way you see me in your eyes, but I know how it makes you feel. I see what it does to you, and how much it means to you. All I can do is give you affirmation, be appreciative, and be grateful.

  3. #23
    ENFJ - The Givers

    i've loved alot of times but never been loved,i love love but i fall in love WAY to easily. Like i feel that i see things in people that they don't even see in them selves, and most girls don't even know me.Rejectionis the worst but i'll never give up on love
    jack in the box thanked this post.

  4. #24
    INTJ - The Scientists

    Quote Originally Posted by Mr Anderson View Post
    And why did they take the dating part down on here? Oh well.

    It's not enough that most people don't understand us, but to not find someone romantically who doesn't. That's just Cruel.
    Yes, the took the dating part down, just when I was about to sign up >.<

    I do obsess over love, a goal I pursue and its depressing having to evaluate so many people, and none of them making the cut... though my feelings do not come easily, but when they do they are all-out. I want to lose myself is someone, and want someone just as passionate. I suppose the Isolation has made me like this... I've closely known few Ituitives IRL, even throughout my life. Only my ENTP friend (male) whose gone away to college now and my father... and my father is... my father.
    Last edited by 0,1,1,2,3,5,8,13,21,34; 05-02-2010 at 11:23 AM.

  5. #25
    INFP - The Idealists


    Quote Originally Posted by 3pnt1415926535897932384 View Post
    Yes, the took the dating part down, just when I was about to sign up >.<

    I do obsess over love, a goal I pursue and its depressing having to evaluate so many people, and none of them making the cut... though my feelings do not come easily, but when they do they are all-out. I want to lose myself is someone, and want someone just as passionate.
    I realize now that we don't need the dating section on PC. Just search around I suppose..
    walkawaysun09 thanked this post.

  6. #26
    INFP - The Idealists

    Quote Originally Posted by Mr Anderson View Post
    Tell you the truth, it has too many cons. The worst part of this is I crave love more than anything. I mean romantic love. <--- That sounds so dumb and cheesy as I repeat it out loud.
    You don't even know the half of it.


    I believe my maker made me into a defect, and pushed me out anyway. "Nah, she'll be aiight"
    Personally I find this to be true, but not just this aspect of being. I think all around we've been given the short straw, and in a twisted way we don't want to change it.

    Do most of you infps have compatibility issues? Heh..perhaps we are just screwed.
    From birth. Sadly. It's not enough that most people don't understand us, but to not find someone romantically who doesn't. That's just Cruel.
    When it comes to compatability I think I'm pretty much defeated. With something that comes so difficult yet is so important to many of us, why is it so hard? It's a cruel joke reality has played on us, and for most there doesn't seem to be a remedy.

    As for a remedy to this situation?

    I'm afraid there are none, and that's why I've given up entertaining the idea.

  7. #27
    INFP - The Idealists

    *HUGS* dont be sad eventually you will find the right person and will have a great live with him, just dont think about it much and try to enjoy your life because you will meet him in the weirdest places and when you least expecting it ...so always smile and keep your charm
    walkawaysun09 and refugee thanked this post.

  8. #28
    INFP - The Idealists

    Quote Originally Posted by 3pnt1415926535897932384 View Post
    Yes, the took the dating part down, just when I was about to sign up >.<

    I do obsess over love, a goal I pursue and its depressing having to evaluate so many people, and none of them making the cut... though my feelings do not come easily, but when they do they are all-out. I want to lose myself is someone, and want someone just as passionate. I suppose the Isolation has made me like this... I've closely known few Ituitives IRL, even throughout my life. Only my ENTP friend (male) whose gone away to college now and my father.
    Love is always have been my goal in life, and i always searched for the right one to spend my life with, the one that i will feel secure and continent with ...i always had my own dreams about him and how he will be and even i wrote to him many notebooks of letters he never read (i know i am crazy)
    but i believe that sometimes to fail to see that love is in front of our eyes and we miss it sometimes for something else, or because we are stubborn
    0,1,1,2,3,5,8,13,21,34 and AllorNuthin thanked this post.

  9. #29
    ENFJ - The Givers


    How odd I have not seen or dug deep enough to find this thread until now...and it kinda gave me those "happy tears" I sometimes get. *Hugs Mr. Anderson* You really do have a way of bringing up topics that relate to so many people, no matter the variance of positive and negative responses you get.

    I guess as a non-INFP I can say I need love as well, and right now am very happy that I think I've found someone who gets me, and can build upon my strengths as I try to build up hers and fortify the walls of her weaknesses as she fortifies mine, making each other better is the best thing about "love".

    As far as reading people and being able to see into their souls upon meeting them, even if you can't, it doesn't entirely mean you can't gain that understanding over a lifetime with that person, lover or friend. Do you know everything about your parents? Do you know everything about your siblings, if you have them? People have a tendency to hide their darkest parts from others at first, as they are afraid of scaring each other away, even if that "darkest" part isn't as dark or unnatural or unlovable as the person who holds it perceives it to be. You may never have 100% insight into what they are thinking or feeling, but if you get well beyond 50%, you'll be able to meet their needs and only rarely need to ask for clarification so you are giving them exactly what they want right now.

    And Jef614, yes, "beautiful" is the first word that describes that song for me, but it also reminds me of a more spiritual side of myself, which sometimes doesn't get out, for fear of being "overcome" by things outside myself. By that, I mean like...fear of becoming suddenly possessed by the spirits of this world, dead, deity, demon, angel, etc. I sometimes feel if I am too spiritual, I open myself up to be a conduit to the other side, as strange as that may sound...and this song just reminds me of how little I've been using that side of myself lately. But that can also go for love, at times...the overwhelming feeling of loving someone can force me to take a step back for a moment and consider the repercussions of just "jumping in with only feeling and being carried down that river into the ocean". Call it a moment of hesitation before jumping, but once I've jumped, there is no turning back, I am carried headlong as far as the water of Love takes me, and this song reminds me of that as well. Though unfortunately for me, I can't do as Mr. Anderson says and uh...listen with headphones. I only have one "good" ear due to ear infections/tumors, so...I kinda need to listen to things on speakers or listen twice while flipping the Right headphone to the left so I can hear the left in my right...and it makes me sad I'll never be able to appreciate the music I love as much as someone else because of that handicap.

    For those who think they were put here to not have love...remember your age, you are yet young, you have not aged beyond the years of finding love. To put it bluntly: My mom's uncle Don never really dated much, and found his love at the age of 40, having his first and probably only child at 41 after they got married. They have been together a number of years now, and he's still an example of why I know there is always time for that, so don't feel like since now is bad, the future will be too. Devoid of love in the present, or having problems in the past with love, is not an accurate predictor of the future.

    And SVALP...read the god-damned Dexter books you fool! You get a lot more of that kind of introspection and feeling like most people are always wearing masks and faking their emotions...though you get a different feeling in the "Dexter in the Dark", but I won't spoil why...let's just say he is given a bit of a more blunt ability to understand why he is "somewhat wrong", whether he accepts it and remembers that his whole life or not.

    The Joni Mitchell song makes my heart ache on the inside, knowing that there are quite a number of ways for this song to be interpreted on a personal level. For me, it reminds me of a dream I had once...about losing the one I loved most in my life, and how that dream stuck with me, no matter if it was about someone else, the feeling still applies; no matter what, the thought of losing someone that important to you, it just makes you want to cry thinking about it.

    And about the dating part of the forums...I never even realized they had that till it was mentioned...weird...I guess you are right though, just look around, here and in your real life. One in-depth conversation about how you view your own life and how they view theirs can change your life...all it takes is a single night or two of staying up and talking to change your view on things

    P.S. *Hugs* Those who have it, keep it. Those who haven't found it, keep looking, it's out there, somewhere, for everyone.
    und3rScore and Hiki thanked this post.

  10. #30
    INFP - The Idealists

    Quote Originally Posted by jeff614 View Post
    i'm sometimes convinced no woman will ever "get" me. as an example, if she were to listen to a favorite song of mine she'd never get the meaning, the subtleties in the instruments, or why the song moves me the way it does. i then think that if no one else can get something as simple (in my mind) as that then how can they ever understand me?

    i'm able to connect with women on basic levels but there's never any strong bond there that tells me this is the one or that this will last. is it too much to ask for a woman who knows me at the core and can walk into a room and know exactly what i'm feeling without me saying a word? :D
    Jeff, there are few people who can walk into a room and know you,and far more who could care less. However,when the right one sees you,you may not know it.they see you to the core,and often they see most people like this...(and thus have already chosen someone else unfortunatly) we as INFPs see everything about a person weather it is good or bad,and judge our feelings off of it. Some other types overlook the bad things,and those are often the ones that are unhappily married.so I suppose we have to wait for the perfect person,and then it will all be worth it. Because needles to say we have all had a pretty rough ride in life


     
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