[INFP] How do you know a soulmate? - Page 2

How do you know a soulmate?

View Poll Results: Will you find your soulmate

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  • Yes, I will find my one and only soulmate

    30 18.52%
  • Yes, I will find one of my soulmates

    40 24.69%
  • I may or may not find my soulmate

    20 12.35%
  • I may or may not find one of my soulmates

    35 21.60%
  • I don't believe that I have a soulmate, multiple or otherwise

    27 16.67%
  • I haven't decided

    10 6.17%
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This is a discussion on How do you know a soulmate? within the INFP Forum - The Idealists forums, part of the NF's Temperament Forum- The Dreamers category; Someone who touches your soul, and you theirs in a very profound and life-changing way....

  1. #11
    INFP - The Idealists

    Someone who touches your soul, and you theirs in a very profound and life-changing way.
    faeriegal713, cheezey, Latoslapise and 1 others thanked this post.

  2. #12
    INFP - The Idealists

    I suppose I should answer my own question, huh?

    Looking back through some of the old threads from September to recently, I can see that my opinion has changed regarding what a soulmate is and whether or not there are multiple soulmates and whether there is even a chance for me to find him.

    First, I believe that there are multiple "soulmates" for each of us running around the world, but they are primarily all people who we have developed strong connections with in past lives and who continually seek each other out so as to share in our current lessons and life experiences. Strong bonds from life times' worth of interaction can't help but pull us to together and we will recognize them, somehow. There will be that instant "click" and understanding of who the other person is and just /knowing/ that they are Special to you and that you want to know them better after saying "hi" to them the first time. I've experienced that sort of connection with one person, a woman who is sadly no longer in my life. I know that she was such a soulmate.There was no romantic interest, but the connection was instantaneous from just one back and forth TEXT conversation on my LJ just over 1 year ago.

    However, I have started to realize that there are perhaps two different kinds of soulmates, two at the very least I should say. Ones like my friend above who come into our lives and are catalysts for change and redefining ourselves and our places in the world. Sometimes, they stay with us for the rest of this life, other times they are only here long enough to create that initial spark and then they leave us to continue on our divergent paths.

    The second kind, the kind that I think most people think of when they say or think the word "soulmate" is the one person in this world who is not just a catalyst for change, but who's life twines together with yours so perfectly that they are your change as much as you are theirs. Once you have found and know this person, you will never be able to separate your lives from each other, to do so would be to break you both.

    I don't remember where I had read about it, but there are trees sometimes known as "lovers," who's roots are the same despite appearing to be two separate trees. When one tree is cut down or dies, the other will follow soon thereafter. In this sense, I believe that I can know my perfect soulmate because once I have met him, I will never be able to dream or imagine my life without him. Life truly will be something else entirely, a Before and After sort of thing.

    What saddens me is that I think many people will settle for their catalyst type soulmates, if they don't settle for someone who is not even that. I was ready to do so just one month ago, and looking back at the previous eight years or so, I can see how I became so disillusioned with life and love and that I just gave up on everything. Down to marrying someone because, well, what reason did I have to hope for anything better? Some of the people here changed my mind, and though I'm still struggling with changing years worth of programming from multiple controlling people in my life, I will not give up. I will find my perfect soulmate, or die in the process, whether it takes months, years, or decades. I will not settle; I will explore, search, and challenge myself in every way possible to find him.

    Now here's to hoping that my soulmate won't be one who settles. My hopes are that if I'm determined to find him as much as I feel I am, then he will be of a similar temperament and will not settle either. *crosses fingers, knocks on wood, spins around in a circle, insert any other way to ask for Luck to intervene*

  3. #13
    INFP - The Idealists

    Quote Originally Posted by faeriegal713 View Post
    I suppose I should answer my own question, huh?

    Looking back through some of the old threads from September to recently, I can see that my opinion has changed regarding what a soulmate is and whether or not there are multiple soulmates and whether there is even a chance for me to find him.

    First, I believe that there are multiple "soulmates" for each of us running around the world, but they are primarily all people who we have developed strong connections with in past lives and who continually seek each other out so as to share in our current lessons and life experiences. Strong bonds from life times' worth of interaction can't help but pull us to together and we will recognize them, somehow. There will be that instant "click" and understanding of who the other person is and just /knowing/ that they are Special to you and that you want to know them better after saying "hi" to them the first time. I've experienced that sort of connection with one person, a woman who is sadly no longer in my life. I know that she was such a soulmate.There was no romantic interest, but the connection was instantaneous from just one back and forth TEXT conversation on my LJ just over 1 year ago.

    However, I have started to realize that there are perhaps two different kinds of soulmates, two at the very least I should say. Ones like my friend above who come into our lives and are catalysts for change and redefining ourselves and our places in the world. Sometimes, they stay with us for the rest of this life, other times they are only here long enough to create that initial spark and then they leave us to continue on our divergent paths.

    The second kind, the kind that I think most people think of when they say or think the word "soulmate" is the one person in this world who is not just a catalyst for change, but who's life twines together with yours so perfectly that they are your change as much as you are theirs. Once you have found and know this person, you will never be able to separate your lives from each other, to do so would be to break you both.

    I don't remember where I had read about it, but there are trees sometimes known as "lovers," who's roots are the same despite appearing to be two separate trees. When one tree is cut down or dies, the other will follow soon thereafter. In this sense, I believe that I can know my perfect soulmate because once I have met him, I will never be able to dream or imagine my life without him. Life truly will be something else entirely, a Before and After sort of thing.

    What saddens me is that I think many people will settle for their catalyst type soulmates, if they don't settle for someone who is not even that. I was ready to do so just one month ago, and looking back at the previous eight years or so, I can see how I became so disillusioned with life and love and that I just gave up on everything. Down to marrying someone because, well, what reason did I have to hope for anything better? Some of the people here changed my mind, and though I'm still struggling with changing years worth of programming from multiple controlling people in my life, I will not give up. I will find my perfect soulmate, or die in the process, whether it takes months, years, or decades. I will not settle; I will explore, search, and challenge myself in every way possible to find him.

    Now here's to hoping that my soulmate won't be one who settles. My hopes are that if I'm determined to find him as much as I feel I am, then he will be of a similar temperament and will not settle either. *crosses fingers, knocks on wood, spins around in a circle, insert any other way to ask for Luck to intervene*
    Yikes. When you put it like that, I get all tense inside because I feel like one of those settlers. I hope I don't do my soulmate wrong in the end by settling. I hope yours doesn't as well. Good luck to you finding him.
    faeriegal713 and PollyPocket thanked this post.

  4. #14
    INFP - The Idealists

    Quote Originally Posted by laurachanelle View Post
    Yikes. When you put it like that, I get all tense inside because I feel like one of those settlers. I hope I don't do my soulmate wrong in the end by settling. I hope yours doesn't as well. Good luck to you finding him.
    I love to find someone I can live and create our own fantasy life and world. One who understands this world creation. I love that. Then, when time calls for it, do what you have to do in the real world.
    faeriegal713, Lad and PollyPocket thanked this post.

  5. #15
    INFP - The Idealists

    I'm all his. Oh! my sassiness and side glances.
    We're making babies, some day I will tell him.
    faeriegal713 and PollyPocket thanked this post.

  6. #16
    INFP - The Idealists

    Well, I would like to answer 1 or 2, but I have my doubts and they have only increased over the years. After three failed marriages, it is doubtful as to whether I will ever find even one. My definition of a soul mate, as in the "one soul mate" definition and sense of the phrase, is someone who absolutely understands, respects and appreciates me whether they agree with my values and beliefs or not. Is someone who I look forward to spending time with and sharing intimate conversations and time with. Someone intelligent and street smart all at the same time. Someone who gives me butterflies in my stomach.... someone who I can learn something from, someone who has a warped sense of humor and makes me laugh often. Someone who likes to play and is in touch with his feminine side. I want someone who sees through all the bullshit in the world and calls it and isn't afraid to say it.......ah let's face it, unless I miraculously land Marilyn Manson then it's an emphatic no, I don't have one.
    faeriegal713 and PollyPocket thanked this post.

  7. #17
    INFP - The Idealists



    Two imperfect people with a perfect view of one another.
    faeriegal713, Latoslapise, keelinyeah and 3 others thanked this post.

  8. #18
    INFP - The Idealists

    Quote Originally Posted by faeriegal713 View Post
    the one person in this world who is not just a catalyst for change, but who's life twines together with yours so perfectly that they are your change as much as you are theirs. Once you have found and know this person, you will never be able to separate your lives from each other, to do so would be to break you both.
    I love this.
    faeriegal713 thanked this post.

  9. #19
    INFP - The Idealists

    Perhaps I should further explain my definition of a soul mate. I am not using the word in the way that is fashionable these days. Rather for me it is referring to a connection that is much deeper and more profound and goes way beyond our limited understanding of a single human lifetime.

    And on the other hand it does not mean that when you will meet this soulmate, you will automatically completely understand each other.
    Nor does it always mean that there will be a romantic connection. A soulmate can be a romantic partner. But it can also be a parent, an uncle, a good friend. Or maybe your soulmate is that old guy you meet only once in your life one day sitting on a bench in the park.
    When you meet your soulmate you may share a lifetime together. Or perhaps you simply exchange just one single glance on a busy street while doing your shopping.
    And maybe you and your soulmate share a whole lifetime on this Earth without even meeting each other.

    All I know is that somehow for me it worked out in a very special way. But the future remains uncertain and fate as yet has not decided. I can not presume to understand what it all means, just that it is part of a lesson I need to learn for some reason.
    faeriegal713 thanked this post.

  10. #20
    INFP

    Quote Originally Posted by Sily View Post
    Soulmates- you don't have to explain & the timing is perfect. It's like when dancing with them they don't step on your toes. My life has not been limited by just one soulmate... rather many.
    I'll add to mine - immediate connection & comfort, no *trying* or work needed between the two. Rather.. no forcing. Soulmate to me doesn't just mean romantic partner, it can also be friend, teacher, parent, colleague.

    faeriegal713 and Latoslapise thanked this post.


     
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