[INFP] INFPs are unlikeable/unlovable/unable to be lived with? - Page 13

INFPs are unlikeable/unlovable/unable to be lived with?

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This is a discussion on INFPs are unlikeable/unlovable/unable to be lived with? within the INFP Forum - The Idealists forums, part of the NF's Temperament Forum- The Dreamers category; Shall i say a secret to you? We are the purest souls and nearest to God and angels. No one ...

  1. #121

    Shall i say a secret to you? We are the purest souls and nearest to God and angels. No one can even match us in compassion or human understanding, not even ISFJs. Not just that no one can grasp an information as deeply as us, not even INFJs. We can also see from every other type's POV, they cannot. So let us forgive and forget.

  2. #122

    Quote Originally Posted by ninjahitsawall View Post
    Tbh, I think you are paying more attention to the negative posts and not as much to the positive ones. The OP of the thread you posted was expressing appreciation of INFP's. Then there was that post that came in defending INFP's when someone said they are hypocritical. There were several others that said positive things as well.

    Also, what happened to this? "We're actually very independent and often don't care what people think. Sometimes it can actually be quite difficult for me to adequately express the degree to which I don't give a shit what people think.*"

    INTJ's also have Fi and I can relate to that myself... it's the Fe that gets wrapped up in the social stuff, I thought. So my question is, why do you care about the criticisms? Or is that statement not entirely accurate?
    Shehe seems just hurt which i was also reading 3 back to back posts not on this site. One said so inconsiderately that all INFPs eventually do suicide and die. I think she/he is just young and i know how i horrified while i first read such things about my cognition.

    OP is just being INFP. INFP's nature to overanalyze everything.

  3. #123

    Quote Originally Posted by AesSidhe View Post
    Remember that as an INFP you are an Idealist who thinks and philosophizes about how to turn this World into an Utopia (When an INFP turns to their Dark Side, their ideal World might turn into a Distopia for the masses, but when an INFP their Dark Side takes over, they often believe that this is the only way to create harmony in the World. Which is essentially the end goal of an INFP: harmony). This often clashes with the 'T'-types who look at the World from a technical point of view, who easily dismiss your ideas, but that's because they're often stuck thinking in a box. As an INFP you are one of those people who constantly thinks out of the box, and based on the themes you mainly think about these thoughts are often extremely controversial, revolutionary and against conservative society. This turns you into the ENEMY of the conservative types who want to keep their boxes (labels) and their outdated society to classify and rule over people.

    Also remember that since your end goal in the World is Harmony, many of J (judgmental)-types will see you as weak, because you will try to keep peace between people, you'll avoid aggressive clashes and try to keep discussions light and peaceful, but the J-types want you to take a stand, to fight, to defend your ideals. But then when you do make a stand, because they're stomping on your most precious ideals, then you might turn into an avenging angel with a flaming sword prepared to root out all evil, and this we as F (feeling)-types do in such an emotional and powerful way, that the T (technical)-types will see our outburst of emotions as irrational and ignore it as useless, childish blabbering, because they have a hard time understanding and coping with emotions.

    On top of that there is the sad truth that most INFPs are idealists and dreamers who think and talk about the perfect World and how to bring it about, but often they're not the ones that will implement these ideas into reality, something INFJ 'will' do. (INFJs are not idle dreamers, but people capable of taking concrete steps to realize their goals and make a lasting positive impact.) This will make most types who are action driven and not thought driven see us as inconsequential. It's like being depressed yourself, but helping others get out of their depression. What right do you have to tell people how to get out of depression and help them actually get out of it, while you don't help yourself first? This is a good example of why action based types see us as inconsequential and so as people with empty words. The best thing to counter these arguments is by actually turning your own ideas and ideals into concrete things in reality (That is why I travel around the World doing volunteering work and trying to change the World if only a little bit, because that way I can turn my ideals into concrete reality)

    Now you also have to realize that INTJ's, are 'J's, they judge the world, they judge people, they judge everything, while you as a 'P' perceive the World, and accept it as it is. This is why you often won't take action, like said before, because even if you dream and think about the perfect World, you are accepting, and loving of the World that is. This combined with your idealism of a harmonious World you don't understand why people judge you, because can't we all get along? Can't we all be friends? Those are things you often dream about, to have this World where everyone are brothers and sisters of each other and we are all friends. So then when a 'J' says things like they do on their forum, you will feel hurt (because we have a hard time dealing with criticism), because you don't understand why they can't see the benefits of this harmonious beautiful World that you dream of.

    Now why don't INTJ's see the benefits of our harmonious beautiful World? Because they play a power-game, and they get energy out of playing that game, while you as an INFP create energy through your deeper connection with this beautiful harmonious World. A big part of how you socially interact with people, is based on you giving away the energy: to feed others, to serve others, and to create happiness. This is why after social interaction you have to seclude yourself to recreate the energy you lost/gave away during social interaction. This is also why we are often perceived as being overemotional, it's because we absorb all the negative energy of the people around us, while we're feeding them with positive energy, and that sometimes totally fries our emotional circuits. Now since the INTJ knows how to play the power-game of energy acquirement, they are perfect energy vampires that can suck us dry, which results in many of the comments you might see on INTJ forums about INFP's. Now why don't they believe in our harmonious beautiful peaceful World? Because in such World there would be no more power-games, there would be no more conflict, and this means that they will lose their (easy) way of acquiring the energy, which is utterly frightening for them.

    I hope this made sense :)
    You know sometimes i get so so so angry on people as a whole when average is greater that i tend to think to destroy human species? Then i cool down and start to think positive.

  4. #124

    Quote Originally Posted by Teen Rose View Post
    Shehe seems just hurt which i was also reading 3 back to back posts not on this site. One said so inconsiderately that all INFPs eventually do suicide and die. I think she/he is just young and i know how i horrified while i first read such things about my cognition.

    OP is just being INFP. INFP's nature to overanalyze everything.
    Ah yeah taking stuff that is relevant to you on the internet to heart can be rough

  5. #125

    The topic itself intrigues me a lot. Being an INFP I am generally unliked, unloved or being ignored. I don't want to go negative but people make me feel the same way. I am so much pissed off literally. Even I let go my introversion and try to fit but I never fit in as per people's choice. I would like to elaborate my feelings in a much better way.

    BEING UNLIKED

    Means I am so much different. My choices are different. I am inclined to those things which people don't like. I like Indian classical music. I am the most spiritual person in any type of crowd. I am rebel to any type of thoughts. In this modernised era, either I am childish or I am a hermit or I am a old old person. But no one has ever seen my humour, no one appreciates the compassion. No one. I am always a misfit. People avoid to talk to me... This kills me a lot.

    BEING UNLOVED
    This is really a heartbreaking point. Not that I was in a relationship and my heart is broken. But to be loved essentially and adequately is all what I wanted. Boyfriends do break hearts, but family... My parents love me so much. I love them back too but apart from parents I want others to love me. I love my brother so much and keep stories about him, that he is so much great and write I Love You in the whatsapp statuses. But he never does it for me. He says I am too busy to do all that stuffs but always keeps his wife and daughter's stories, showing his love to them. We should not expect but this is the least I want...

    My friends always keep me alone. So I also prefer to stay alone. I talk but I am literally lost. Only my one friend remembers my birthday and I feel great. None of my friend remembers my birthday. This makes me to hate my birthday...

    Now the last thing is about the so called best friend. He told me he likes me. May be it was for fun. Whenever he lost control he told he Loves me so much. That really touched me. The thing is different that I was never serious about our so called frexting. Never even fulfilled his wishes. But somewhere in my heart he developed a soft corner and realised that I am capable of being loved. But this bubble also broke

    BEING IGNORED

    To my so called male best friends. He also ignores my messages. I know he is very busy but he is active till 1a.m. 2a.m. but still he never replies. When he texts I text him lately but I do. He forgot my birthday and gave me the last birthday wish and said that I wished you the last because I wanted to remember his wish. He came to know that today is my birthday seeing my birthday stories. He never ever seems to forget his other friends stories. He is nice person, a very kind person but he messaged me till he wanted someone to be of fun. Now he is not even replying me and said we are best friends. I like him literally and he now ignores...

    I have decided not to talk with him from now. Multiple of times I have decided not to talk to him, but I am the only one to initiate the talk. But this time I won't because I have swore on myself. I LOVE MYSELF MORE THAN ANYTHING. I don't want to see his face, because if I will see his face, I will get nervous or behave very awkardly. Just to avoid his face, I will not attend the convocation ceremony.....

    My general friends don't even bother to message me even though I message them, I greet them, congratulate them. They all are indifferent.

    My teachers also don't appreciate me. While making the decision, my decision is the most unliked one by the group.

    I don't even attend the parties but see everyone's stories and get happy stupidly. They all together have so much of fun without me. In the festivities, they do enjoy a lot. I have not taken a single photo with my friends. They don't even bring cakes for my birthday. They don't even keep my stories. I am not being appreciated...

    I am happy but I do feel so much sad. I don't expect any selfish things, but I want some LOVE....
    Anunnaki Spirit and big90cloud thanked this post.

  6. #126
    ENTJ - The Executives

    All types get a bunch of negative stereotypes, not just INFP. Lol.

    ESTJ: Loudmouthed, close-minded asshole.
    ISTJ: Quieter, but snarky, anal-retentive, and even more closed-minded than ESTJ.
    ESFJ: Empty-headed drama-whoring bitch.
    ISFJ: Self-defeating martyr who is a wet blanket on every fire.

    ESTP: Slimeball con-artist. Probably a druggie, too.
    ISTP: Serial killer.
    ESFP: Mindless, self-destructive slut.
    ISFP: Self-defeating whiner.

    ENFJ: Manipulative, attention whoring cult leader.
    INFJ: Manipulative and unable to handle feelings constructively.
    ENFP: Flaky, attention span of a chicken in a hurricane, irresponsible.
    INFP: Self-destructive whiner, also irresponsible.

    ENTJ: Tyrannical, psychopathic control freak.
    INTJ: Snarky, obnoxious pain the ass who thinks he's better than everyone else.
    ENTP: Talks nonsensical bullshit and trolls all day, no substance.
    INTP: Lives in mother's basement all their lives, complete loser.
    Inside Job thanked this post.

  7. #127

    Quote Originally Posted by musicalstorm View Post
    The topic itself intrigues me a lot. Being an INFP I am generally unliked, unloved or being ignored. I don't want to go negative but people make me feel the same way. I am so much pissed off literally. Even I let go my introversion and try to fit but I never fit in as per people's choice. I would like to elaborate my feelings in a much better way.

    BEING UNLIKED

    Means I am so much different. My choices are different. I am inclined to those things which people don't like. I like Indian classical music. I am the most spiritual person in any type of crowd. I am rebel to any type of thoughts. In this modernised era, either I am childish or I am a hermit or I am a old old person. But no one has ever seen my humour, no one appreciates the compassion. No one. I am always a misfit. People avoid to talk to me... This kills me a lot.

    BEING UNLOVED
    This is really a heartbreaking point. Not that I was in a relationship and my heart is broken. But to be loved essentially and adequately is all what I wanted. Boyfriends do break hearts, but family... My parents love me so much. I love them back too but apart from parents I want others to love me. I love my brother so much and keep stories about him, that he is so much great and write I Love You in the whatsapp statuses. But he never does it for me. He says I am too busy to do all that stuffs but always keeps his wife and daughter's stories, showing his love to them. We should not expect but this is the least I want...

    My friends always keep me alone. So I also prefer to stay alone. I talk but I am literally lost. Only my one friend remembers my birthday and I feel great. None of my friend remembers my birthday. This makes me to hate my birthday...

    Now the last thing is about the so called best friend. He told me he likes me. May be it was for fun. Whenever he lost control he told he Loves me so much. That really touched me. The thing is different that I was never serious about our so called frexting. Never even fulfilled his wishes. But somewhere in my heart he developed a soft corner and realised that I am capable of being loved. But this bubble also broke

    BEING IGNORED

    To my so called male best friends. He also ignores my messages. I know he is very busy but he is active till 1a.m. 2a.m. but still he never replies. When he texts I text him lately but I do. He forgot my birthday and gave me the last birthday wish and said that I wished you the last because I wanted to remember his wish. He came to know that today is my birthday seeing my birthday stories. He never ever seems to forget his other friends stories. He is nice person, a very kind person but he messaged me till he wanted someone to be of fun. Now he is not even replying me and said we are best friends. I like him literally and he now ignores...

    I have decided not to talk with him from now. Multiple of times I have decided not to talk to him, but I am the only one to initiate the talk. But this time I won't because I have swore on myself. I LOVE MYSELF MORE THAN ANYTHING. I don't want to see his face, because if I will see his face, I will get nervous or behave very awkardly. Just to avoid his face, I will not attend the convocation ceremony.....

    My general friends don't even bother to message me even though I message them, I greet them, congratulate them. They all are indifferent.

    My teachers also don't appreciate me. While making the decision, my decision is the most unliked one by the group.

    I don't even attend the parties but see everyone's stories and get happy stupidly. They all together have so much of fun without me. In the festivities, they do enjoy a lot. I have not taken a single photo with my friends. They don't even bring cakes for my birthday. They don't even keep my stories. I am not being appreciated...

    I am happy but I do feel so much sad. I don't expect any selfish things, but I want some LOVE....
    Find a healthy mature isfj. We make the best caretakers.

    Sent from my VS995 using Tapatalk
    secondpassing and Voyageur thanked this post.

  8. #128
    Unknown

    Quote Originally Posted by Elistra View Post
    All types get a bunch of negative stereotypes, not just INFP. Lol.

    ESTJ: Loudmouthed, close-minded asshole.
    ISTJ: Quieter, but snarky, anal-retentive, and even more closed-minded than ESTJ.
    ESFJ: Empty-headed drama-whoring bitch.
    ISFJ: Self-defeating martyr who is a wet blanket on every fire.

    ESTP: Slimeball con-artist. Probably a druggie, too.
    ISTP: Serial killer.
    ESFP: Mindless, self-destructive slut.
    ISFP: Self-defeating whiner.

    ENFJ: Manipulative, attention whoring cult leader.
    INFJ: Manipulative and unable to handle feelings constructively.
    ENFP: Flaky, attention span of a chicken in a hurricane, irresponsible.
    INFP: Self-destructive whiner, also irresponsible.

    ENTJ: Tyrannical, psychopathic control freak.
    INTJ: Snarky, obnoxious pain the ass who thinks he's better than everyone else.
    ENTP: Talks nonsensical bullshit and trolls all day, no substance.
    INTP: Lives in mother's basement all their lives, complete loser.
    These are quite accurate.

  9. #129
    ENTJ - The Executives

    Quote Originally Posted by musicalstorm View Post
    The topic itself intrigues me a lot. Being an INFP I am generally unliked, unloved or being ignored. I don't want to go negative but people make me feel the same way. I am so much pissed off literally. Even I let go my introversion and try to fit but I never fit in as per people's choice. I would like to elaborate my feelings in a much better way.

    BEING UNLIKED

    Means I am so much different. My choices are different. I am inclined to those things which people don't like. I like Indian classical music. I am the most spiritual person in any type of crowd. I am rebel to any type of thoughts. In this modernised era, either I am childish or I am a hermit or I am a old old person. But no one has ever seen my humour, no one appreciates the compassion. No one. I am always a misfit. People avoid to talk to me... This kills me a lot.
    You're not going to be everyone's cup of tea, and every person you meet is not going to be yours. Find people you mutually enjoy the company of, and don't bother with the others. Not worth it.

    Quote Originally Posted by musicalstorm View Post
    BEING UNLOVED
    This is really a heartbreaking point. Not that I was in a relationship and my heart is broken. But to be loved essentially and adequately is all what I wanted. Boyfriends do break hearts, but family... My parents love me so much. I love them back too but apart from parents I want others to love me. I love my brother so much and keep stories about him, that he is so much great and write I Love You in the whatsapp statuses. But he never does it for me. He says I am too busy to do all that stuffs but always keeps his wife and daughter's stories, showing his love to them. We should not expect but this is the least I want...
    in other words, he does have time and chooses not to. Stop being so nice to him, hoping he'll suddenly realize he should reciprocate. People like this generally don't.

    Quote Originally Posted by musicalstorm View Post
    My friends always keep me alone. So I also prefer to stay alone. I talk but I am literally lost. Only my one friend remembers my birthday and I feel great. None of my friend remembers my birthday. This makes me to hate my birthday...
    Get better friends.

    Quote Originally Posted by musicalstorm View Post
    Now the last thing is about the so called best friend. He told me he likes me. May be it was for fun. Whenever he lost control he told he Loves me so much. That really touched me. The thing is different that I was never serious about our so called frexting. Never even fulfilled his wishes. But somewhere in my heart he developed a soft corner and realised that I am capable of being loved. But this bubble also broke
    Also broke? Hmm?

    Quote Originally Posted by musicalstorm View Post
    BEING IGNORED

    To my so called male best friends. He also ignores my messages. I know he is very busy but he is active till 1a.m. 2a.m. but still he never replies. When he texts I text him lately but I do. He forgot my birthday and gave me the last birthday wish and said that I wished you the last because I wanted to remember his wish. He came to know that today is my birthday seeing my birthday stories. He never ever seems to forget his other friends stories. He is nice person, a very kind person but he messaged me till he wanted someone to be of fun. Now he is not even replying me and said we are best friends. I like him literally and he now ignores...

    I have decided not to talk with him from now. Multiple of times I have decided not to talk to him, but I am the only one to initiate the talk. But this time I won't because I have swore on myself. I LOVE MYSELF MORE THAN ANYTHING. I don't want to see his face, because if I will see his face, I will get nervous or behave very awkardly. Just to avoid his face, I will not attend the convocation ceremony.....

    My general friends don't even bother to message me even though I message them, I greet them, congratulate them. They all are indifferent.
    Outside of performing emergency surgery or actively fighting on a field of battle, nobody is literally "too busy" to take 5 seconds to say hi, or to text someone back within a reasonable timeframe. If they don't make even that minimal effort, it is not because they "can't because they're too busy", it's because they CHOOSE not to.

    Find better friends.

    Quote Originally Posted by musicalstorm View Post
    My teachers also don't appreciate me. While making the decision, my decision is the most unliked one by the group.

    I don't even attend the parties but see everyone's stories and get happy stupidly. They all together have so much of fun without me. In the festivities, they do enjoy a lot. I have not taken a single photo with my friends. They don't even bring cakes for my birthday. They don't even keep my stories. I am not being appreciated...

    I am happy but I do feel so much sad. I don't expect any selfish things, but I want some LOVE....
    Again, find better friends. If you don't feel you're getting as much out as you're putting in, then distance yourself from those people. Don't let yourself be used.
    Voyageur and musicalstorm thanked this post.

  10. #130

    Quote Originally Posted by Elistra View Post



    Again, find better friends. If you don't feel you're getting as much out as you're putting in, then distance yourself from those people. Don't let yourself be used.
    I must say I am not good at making friends. I can connect with anyone but still I can't make a bestie. I am All alone but I am not depressed. My music never makes me depressed. It heals my unknown wounds. All thanks to music for being there for me. I smile always But I feel unimportant. I have time for everyone but no one has time for me. I forgive everyone and let it go.

    I always wish people in their life events or on their achievements, because I don't want to behave the same way they behave with me, But now I want to cut contacts with my every friend. It is really very difficult for me. I still want to.

    SO DISHEARTENING
    Elistra and UberY0shi thanked this post.


     
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