[INFP] Why does she do this?

Why does she do this?

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This is a discussion on Why does she do this? within the INFP Forum - The Idealists forums, part of the NF's Temperament Forum- The Dreamers category; Hello all, fairly new to the forums but I've been somewhat familiar with the MBTI for some time now. I ...

  1. #1
    Unknown Personality

    Why does she do this?

    Hello all, fairly new to the forums but I've been somewhat familiar with the MBTI for some time now.

    I met someone that I'm interested in and am trying to figure out something very specific about her, so I'm hoping somebody here could give me some much appreciated insight. As far as I can tell, her tendencies and disposition likely put her somewhere in INFP land (though she might be an INFJ), so hopefully I'm in the right place.

    This is actually pretty silly but it's been grinding away at me for a while. I've noticed this strange habit in how she seems to react by default to just about anything that's been said in a conversation (with anybody, far as I can tell).

    So, if you see a picture of an adorable puppy you'd go "Awww...", right? And if you're giving a neutral reply of acknowledgement to something somebody says you'd say something like "Oh," right? Now, imagine something in the middle, kind of like an elongated "Ohhh..." that ends up turning into a soft "Awww..." and often, though not always, followed by a kind of *tch* sound (like the tip of her tongue clicking against the roof of her mooth) and a sweet smile.

    That's basically it except what's throwing me off is how she universally replies like this to just about anything that's said and leaves me having no idea how to follow up.

    "Nice day, huh?" -> "Aww..."
    "I did my laundry today." -> "Aww..."
    "So I was reading an article on the mitotic division of amoebic cells..." -> "Awww..."
    *tch*
    :D

    And then I draw a blank, smile vacantly, and look for an exit.

    It was cute the first couple of times but as it started to seem like an increasingly odd/inappropriate reply I started to wonder if she just didn't hear what was being said and simply assumed it was something endearing. But then she does it so often that I've started thinking if it might be her way of communicating a general disinterest in what is being said, or else is feeling somewhat nervous and insecure, or... what?

    Any insights, especially from an INFx woman or someone else who's dealt with this particular idiosyncrasy, would be greatly appreciated.
    Thank you kindly!



  2. #2

    I don't think this is something related to MBTI type at all. It sounds like some kind of tic maybe.

  3. #3
    Unknown Personality

    I second tangled kite. Just a "tch", don't read too much into it! If it really intrigues you, why not ask her?

    :)
    Tangled Kite thanked this post.

  4. #4
    Unknown Personality

    Quote Originally Posted by Tangled Kite View Post
    I don't think this is something related to MBTI type at all. It sounds like some kind of tic maybe.
    I think you're likely right, but the head part of me still wants to figure out what the significance of this particular tic might be and I figure it must somehow be related to her type, you know?

    If you imagined yourself categorically replying like that - what do you think you might be feeling?

    Thanks for the interest!

  5. #5
    Unknown Personality

    Quote Originally Posted by Wheelie View Post
    I second tangled kite. Just a "tch", don't read too much into it! If it really intrigues you, why not ask her?

    :)
    (Band of Brothers! Sweet!)

    I didn't at first, but the more I see her the less sense it makes to me and now I'm somewhat fixated on it (so you can guess what type I am right there).
    I have honestly considered just asking her, it was one of my first instincts, only I'm genuinely concerned I'd seem kinda... intimidating in doing so and might scare/hurt her - we aren't that kind of close, you know?

    Haha, I keep thinking "Why is everything always 'Awww...' with her?"
    Wheelie thanked this post.

  6. #6
    INFP - The Idealists

    Well, as someone whose main means of communication is "awws", "ohs" and half-smiles, I could say it probably means "I heard and understood what you said and I like you enough to acknowledge your presence and I wish to communicate with you but I really have nothing more to say about this topic". Of course she might not mean the same thing with it, but it's probably all harmless and you shouldn't overanalyze it.
    Acey, p55carroll, Demoiselle Dys and 1 others thanked this post.

  7. #7

    Quote Originally Posted by LithiumStranger View Post
    This is actually pretty silly but it's been grinding away at me for a while. I've noticed this strange habit in how she seems to react by default to just about anything that's been said in a conversation (with anybody, far as I can tell).
    If she does it with anybody, I think it isn't something to worry about.

    Are you some xSxJ type...?
    ISFJ, maybe?
    Anyway, I am terrible at guessing other people's type at internet

    Quote Originally Posted by ponyjoyride View Post
    Well, as someone whose main means of communication is "awws", "ohs" and half-smiles, I could say it probably means "I heard and understood what you said and I like you enough to acknowledge your presence and I wish to communicate with you but I really have nothing more to say about this topic". Of course she might not mean the same thing with it, but it's probably all harmless and you shouldn't overanalyze it.
    LoL! Wait, I feel that way sometimes
    You just verbalized my mind very well
    LithiumStranger thanked this post.

  8. #8

    Quote Originally Posted by LithiumStranger View Post
    I think you're likely right, but the head part of me still wants to figure out what the significance of this particular tic might be and I figure it must somehow be related to her type, you know?

    If you imagined yourself categorically replying like that - what do you think you might be feeling?

    Thanks for the interest!
    I don't think you're going to get any decisive reason why she's doing that unless you ask her. We might be the same type but we're not the same person. Many people have developed their own speaking patterns. I've known an ENFP to say "Awww" a lot (in her case it was appropriate response to the situation), I've known an ESTP to say "You know what I'm saying" a lot, I've known an ISFJ to say "seriously" a lot. You see what I'm getting at?
    Demoiselle Dys and LithiumStranger thanked this post.

  9. #9
    Unknown Personality

    Quote Originally Posted by SofiaDarkO View Post
    If she does it with anybody, I think it isn't something to worry about.

    Are you some xSxJ type...?
    ISFJ, maybe?
    Anyway, I am terrible at guessing other people's type at internet
    I'm an INTJ ("that explains alot", eh?) so I'm not so much worried in the "ohmigod!" sense, but rather confounded in the "everything must fit into my categorical bucket or else I don't know what to do!" sense, you know?

    Quote Originally Posted by Tangled Kite View Post
    I don't think you're going to get any decisive reason why she's doing that unless you ask her. We might be the same type but we're not the same person. Many people have developed their own speaking patterns. [...] You see what I'm getting at?
    I... think so. Yes, I think I see what you're getting at. Though it would still be my way to break down a person's speaking pattern and attempt to interpret it in light of their type (and the circumstances) so that I can understand what they mean, and feel comfortable responding appropriately. It's just that this particular instance has had me kinda stumped and, well, frustrated. I would love to some day be on such terms with her that I'd be able to comfortably ask her something like that, I just don't see that going over particularly well right now, so "I must figure this out!" You know what I'm saying?

    Quote Originally Posted by ponyjoyride View Post
    Well, as someone whose main means of communication is "awws", "ohs" and half-smiles, I could say it probably means "I heard and understood what you said and I like you enough to acknowledge your presence and I wish to communicate with you but I really have nothing more to say about this topic". Of course she might not mean the same thing with it, but it's probably all harmless and you shouldn't overanalyze it.
    But over-analyzing is the only thing I'm good at! Haha - seriously though, your input helps me quite a bit. Balancing it together with Tangled Kite's insight it gives me something more concrete to think about, which makes me feel much more comfortable at the prospect of getting to know her better.


    Thank you all for the interest! Still willing to hear more if anybody is still inclined to opine.
    Demoiselle Dys thanked this post.

  10. #10

    I'm not sure what else to tell you. You can try asking in a way that's not so direct.

    Example:
    You- "So I just learned about string theory." (Or insert whatever it is you want to talk to her about.)
    Her- "Aww"
    You- "So you think string theory is cute huh?"

    With any luck she'll explain her reaction.
    Aizar, WickerDeer, p55carroll and 2 others thanked this post.


     
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