This is a discussion on Violent Side of the INFP! within the INFP Forum - The Idealists forums, part of the NF's Temperament Forum- The Dreamers category; Originally Posted by Enemorio Now I know that we are depicted as a peace loving, violence hating type but, I ...
MPW is a fascinating example of an INFP who's been very successful in a worldly manner. Some people would classify him as an 'E' for extroverted or 'J' for judging, but if you know a bit of his history; you'll see it was forced. In retirement, he keeps to himself and is very uncritical of others.
If you have an hour, watch this:
Personally, I learned a lot about myself watching it.
As an INFP, I have a magical superpower where I really understand people. Within seconds, I know a lot about their life. I don't miss small details. At 1:50 in the video above where MPW says "We would run for the next 4 hours," and then changes it to 3.5hrs... I got him. I understand that his innate nature is to storytell even to the extent of embellishment, because for him... the message is more important than the truth. I also realize he's working on himself, and sees value in sharing exactly the truth. He's a natural teacher. I don't know why, but I pick up on all these things instantly, and draw conclusion. (It should be noted, that I don't judge this as either good or bad. I just accept it as part of his personality).
We're deeply intuitive people. We feel things that cannot be seen.
In Theravada meditation (Non-dogmatic/religious Buddhist meditation) within the 4th Jhana (Concentration state, where reality is viewed differently) we these intuitions begin to become visible. Physically visible for some.
Personally, I believe INFPs are naturally spiritual, and more in touch with themselves and the realities of themselves. This, by definition, pushes you forward in meditative practices, and these intuitions become more visible.
In BJJ, we can sense the energy of another. We can't all see it, but we feel it. Like how a blind person navigates via sound. They begin to see using other senses. I believe we have a natural affinity towards this.
A wonderful book that explains a lot of this theory and will help you master almost everything in the world is: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B005TQU7P8/
Also, there's a free version (older version. If you can afford to buy the book, you should) on his website: http://integrateddaniel.info/book/
I think of violence a lot, like taking out an assailant that might try to mug me when I walk home at night. The place I live always has activity outside, and it used to really freak me out. It's better now, but on bad nights, I'll warm up my yelling voice and grab my hammer to bludgeon somebody's face. If there was a physical threat, I would not be a bystander, and I would protect my household.
I've never hit another person. When I do something mean, even if no one else catches it, I feel rotten. So I try not to do things like that. I am unable to speak bad words. I only wrote one curse on this site, and it was in a blog. I try not to feel bad about it because it was more artistic than ruthless.
As a kid, I drew a lot of violence. If there was a kid I didn't like, I would draw them all bloodied up or dead because a terrifying creature was attacking them and eating them. I don't know how many pictures I drew like this, but I devoted a whole notebook to drawings of a certain guy. He wasn't even that bad. He was just an extraverted boy. I still remember drawing a cartoon that said in the first frame: "What does the monster have in his mouth?" Next frame: "Dead *boy's name*!" And they were pretty graphic pictures. I'm surprised no one sent me to the principal's office!
I work out with heavy weights so I can prepare to defend myself if I need to. I'm not a very muscular person. I could never actually strike another person unless they were trying to steal from me/rape/kidnap/other criminal things. I have dreams where I'm angry and try to beat people up, but it's like I'm punching a pillow. It doesn't hurt them, and they even laugh at me.
I definitely wouldn't call myself violent, but I've struggled with anger throughout most of my life.
I threw a lot of temper tantrums when I was younger. I always loved my mom, but that didn't stop us from getting into screaming matches pretty regularly. I felt like I was criticized a lot, and that always makes me fly into angry Te mode. Even if the criticism is made with good intentions. And I know that my mom had good intentions - she wanted to help me get better. But that didn't stop me from hurting at the time.
My mother is a wonderful person, and of course I feel awful about that now.
And I remember when I was 17, I was very depressed and struggling with some pretty dark thoughts of harming myself. One time, I blew up when trying to do my AP calculus homework, screamed about how nobody loved or cared about me, and threw my textbook halfway across the room. Even now, sometimes I punch walls or fly off the handle and yell at people, and I can get very critical and short with people when I'm stressed. This happens a lot, sadly.
I think that some of us INFPs get our Fi treaded on quite a bit. Maybe that's why we flip into Te mode more often than others. I don't like this side of my personality much, but at the same time, there are still positives to it - I can be really assertive if needs be, for example.
Regardless, I've always been very aversive to hurting other people physically. I do not wish physical harm on others. This is why I don't consider myself to be violent. That doesn't mean some INFPs can't be violent, though. I think that even among the same type, there's a lot of individual variation in both temperament and behavior.
Last edited by ImminentThunder; 10-07-2017 at 09:38 PM.