*pops some popcorn*
This is a discussion on What Are Your Honest Opinions on INFP's? within the INFP Forum - The Idealists forums, part of the NF's Temperament Forum- The Dreamers category; *pops some popcorn*...
*pops some popcorn*
I think we tend to be a bit guarded at times which makes it hard for others to understand us. I know i do it, and the few that i have met have been the same way. There is nothing wrong with this, it just makes things harder. My opinion of myself, thats really all i can expand upon beyond what i have already said, I actually like who i am.
I think the cat description is fairly accurate, especially with our tendency to show a lot of affection and then pull away for a while. It's like when you want to pet a cat and they give you an irritated look and go back to licking their crotch, then twenty minutes later they jump right on the book you're reading and remorselessly purr in your face. I like my fellow INFPs a lot, I think they're fascinating people with incredible imaginations. The only gripe I generally have is the flakiness. It's irritating to make plans with someone and have them either show up an hour late or bail at the last minute.
Decision making is always a hilarious loop too.
"Where do you want to eat?"
"I dunno, what are you in the mood for?"
"I'm letting you pick, I'm up for anything."
"Me too, I don't really have a preference."
"You have no preference whatsoever?"
On to infinity.
INFP is actually my favorite type. I have an INFP best friend and an INFP ex-boyfriend whom I completely idealized. I'm an enneagram 4 and Fi issues are often prominent in that type. So I feel a connection to INFP's even though I use Fe more than Fi. I also admire their loyalty to their beliefs and openness to the world. I admire the creativity a lot of INFP's have, and how most don't feel the deep pressure to make immediate decisions the way I do (I'm an INFJ).
I agree with the cat theory and it makes me wonder if anybody that I have met that didn't like me at all, was an extreme cat hater. :P I love cats...and it would make sense afterall.
I think that it's funny how I hate myself so much sometimes...because if I was to put myself in someone else's shoes, I would find myself a generally likeable/lovable person.
Well I think INFPs are wonderful people who are stepped on and used far too often. That's why they tend to be so depressed. But get to know one and you know that the INFP isn't depressed because they think the world is a horrible place. They're depressed because they simply don't understand why the world has to be so cruel because they sure as heck can't understand the mindset of the cruel people in it. They are so innocent and pure of heart and that's both a huge blessing and a huge curse.
Personally, I've met many other types and I don't think I've ever met anyone who fits that description, other than myself, except my INFP best friend.
Ahahaha, @Candid Apple 's description is perfect, I couldn't agree more. Maybe that's why I'm such a cat person :P
But yes, like cats, I think INFP's can be very fickle when it comes to their affection. And also, again like cats, very skittish. We have a tendency to "run away" when we pick up on behavior that frightens us, particularly in romantic relationships. Maybe I'm generalizing, but this is what I've observed. An INFP has a massive capacity for love - We put our all into relationships, we're committed and loyal, and we love passionately. But we are idealists, and that reflects on our relationships. We're also "big picture" people - A sometimes deadly combination. We put our partners up on a pedestal. We love them so much, and think they're just the most wonderful person, and do everything we can to help them and make them happy. That affection can make us blind to their flaws. So when they disappoint us, it impacts us a lot - We lose our image of them and overreact. For example, they tell a lie... so we stop trusting them. They press a particular issue too hard, and it starts an argument. Now, we view them as "pushy", instead of accepting things on a smaller scale and saying "Maybe it was a one-time thing."
Fickle also in a more surface-value sense. One minute we're all smiles and want to snuggle, and the next minute we push people away and "need our space".
The "whats-for-dinner" curse, too. Classic. I'm an INFP, Dad's an ENTP. We're both all about "possibilities". Deciding upon supper is a constant issue :P
I think a lot of INFP's have a hard time with criticism. We ask for it, we're self critical and self aware and we always want to improve. Perfectionistic. Hard on ourselves.
The evidence of this can be found in the fact that this thread even exists at all. xP
So we want criticism, we want to know our flaws, the things people don't like about us so that we can try to fix them, but when someone tells us something we don't expect, we might be prone to getting upset over it or thinking too hard about it.
Thinking too hard. There's another thing we do. Dwell on things. By all means, thinking hard is a good thing. But sometimes we pick things apart when they should really just be taken at face value.
I don't mean to speak badly about INFP's. I'm sure some of these things aren't universal, and a lot of INFP's may have never experienced these things. It's just some issues that I've observed in myself and other INFP's. On the whole, I think we're a pretty likeable type. :) The biggest issue that I hear from non-INFP's is that we're too emotional/sensitive. Cry-babies. Other than that, I haven't heard a whole hell of a lot of complaints. I like being an INFP!
INFP: "Do you want to go to A or B?"
INTJ: "Dunno. You pick. I've been making too many decisions lately"
INFP: "I really don't care."
INTJ: "Flip a coin?"
INFP: "Alright. Heads, we go to A. Tails, we go to B."
INFP: "So... Really? A? Can we flip again?"
INTJ: "Screw that. Let's just eat in the dining hall."
I think I can understand why other people would find us irritating. Some of us (or most, including me :P) tend to get into really abstract state of minds, and many of the things we say are completely objective about things that bare no real relevance to life. Well, maybe this is only me, but it can happen sometimes and I understand all the "What the...? o.0" going on about us.
Still, there are some who I would feel could do well in being just a little less judgemental... *cough*