This is a discussion on Immediate Help Required : INTJ Female crushing on ESTJ Male within the INTJ Forum - The Scientists forums, part of the NT's Temperament Forum- The Intellects category; Man seduction?...
Why are you saying the relationship would never work? Why are you even thinking about a long term relationship at all? Just enjoy his company and see what happens.
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@Girl333 Start talking to him about abstract subjects (which he will most likely enjoy getting into) or even better yet, start talking about serious concrete subjects that rely heavily on abstract strings, and I'm sure your infatuation will quickly turn to frustration and then your rational side should be able to do the rest.
I feel in love with an INTJ, once.
Sorry OP, I don't know if this contribution helps you. If you have a bad feeling about it, then there must be a reason for it, but I still would recommend trying if both of you want to take it somewhere. What's the worst that could happen? If you just want somebody to fuck, then go for it either way, but make it clear to him that it's just a fwb deal.
Well, if you can't figure it by now, maybe you should just stop trying.
Why don't you just whip out a tit?
That's as valid as an "advice" given above.
Or, here's a thought, why don't you just try having a conversation, like everybody else who ever existed?
Or see how much meat he's packing and if it's equine enough for you.
Not complicated. At all.
i like to look at my crushes just to get a sort of snapshot of where i am myself, psychologically. for instance, it was a big deal when i realised at a certain age i had stopped fantasizing about being empathized with and begun fantasizing instead about being taken seriously and respected for the main person i am.
once i figured that out, it got a lot easier for me to dissociate the crush from the person and make it all about meeeeee. idk, maybe i'm a bit narcissistic that way but i do have to admit that most of the time when i have a crush, i'm who those daydreams are really about. they're like this excuse for me imagine another person looking at me and seeing something quite wonderful. so really they're an odd form of self-validation. or a form of daydream about being validated by someone else.
tl;dr: when i'm in love with someone, i think about them. when all i have is a crush, i tend to daydream about them and all the wonderful feelings and thoughts they 'would' have about me. idk if that helps. but ime a crush is usually about stuff that's real in some way, so it's pretty hard to kill them by trying to fight them.
I don't think I understand. If the relationship no longer makes sense, what is the point of being stuck on it? Could you elaborate on why you think you might be stuck? For me, if a relationship no longer makes sense to be in (he doesn't like me back, we have different visions for our future, etc...) that's what it takes for me to get over it.
It just occured to me that this person might be especially interesting. As someone who likes to observe and gather information, I can see how one might get stuck gathering information about an object of affection. If this is the case, I'd suggest finding a substitute subject to gather information about.
Edit to add: I'm terribly confused and sleep deprived. I think I missed this topic by a mile. Gonig to take a break from PerC until I sleep again.
Last edited by brightflashes; 02-28-2018 at 08:07 AM. Reason: I don't know what's going on