[INTJ] Immediate Help Required : INTJ Female crushing on ESTJ Male

Immediate Help Required : INTJ Female crushing on ESTJ Male

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This is a discussion on Immediate Help Required : INTJ Female crushing on ESTJ Male within the INTJ Forum - The Scientists forums, part of the NT's Temperament Forum- The Intellects category; INTJ female here in desperate need of how to get over a crush for a male ESTJ. To provide you ...

  1. #1
    Unknown

    Immediate Help Required : INTJ Female crushing on ESTJ Male

    INTJ female here in desperate need of how to get over a crush for a male ESTJ.

    To provide you with some backgroud of how I got into this unfortunate situation - I was working away, minding my own business and this ESTJ male decided to make and hold eye contact with me and it all went down hill from there. How is it possible for someone to feel so much chemistry and sexual tension and for it to be one-sided? Surely that is not possible - it just does not make sense!

    I have not approached him or told him my feelings about him, but we work very closely together and I have given him my attention and even started conversations with him about things OTHER than work - this is HUGE and I feel like its a big sign that I like him.

    The relationship will never work but the chemisty and sexual tension is so stong it is driving me crazy. I need to cut out the distractions so I can get back to work.

    Give me all your tips on how I can get get over this crush PLEASE and I will forever be in your debt.



  2. #2
    INTJ


    Oh, I actually am friendly with an ESTJ man.

    I don't know all the theory, but hit the humor hard, sincerity hard, knowledge hard, and above all take it easy and slow.

    That's all I got, and that's just from man-friend perspective.

    What's with all the defeatism? If you two have chemistry, just go. But do it like I said!

  3. #3
    INTJ - The Scientists

    Why doesn't this site have both a minimum post & 'thank' requirement before anyone is allowed to start a thread?




    ​<<<<<------------take it frum a koon!
    Necrofantasia thanked this post.

  4. #4
    INTJ


    Quote Originally Posted by intjonn View Post
    Why doesn't this site have both a minimum post & 'thank' requirement before anyone is allowed to start a thread?
    I think it has to do with communism in Asia, but I'm not 100% sure.

  5. #5

    Limit interaction, focus on other things in life to be obesssive about - a new hobby, perhaps. Tbh, the only thing that has gotten me over a crush is telling them and then finding out they’re not interested. If it were a bad position to tell them, then I’d employ the techniques I mentioned at first. If you think of the person, purposefully think of something else. Retrain your mind. Otherwise..yeah you just sit with it til you’re over it.
    elight and Blue Flower thanked this post.

  6. #6
    INTJ - The Scientists

    Maybe I could tell you all the ways a relationship with ESTJ can go sideways. I've been with one for 7 years, so I can tell you all the horror stories that would probably crush your crush immediately. Jokes, aside, I feel you. There is something about INTJ+ESTX chemistry-wise that works like some sort of black magic, at least for me anyway.
    Being you I'd either cut off all contact if possible - or just bang him. Sometimes there is no other way to get over a crush than embracing it and having fun watching the dumpsterfire.

  7. #7
    Unknown

    Quote Originally Posted by Girl333 View Post
    INTJ female here in desperate need of how to get over a crush for a male ESTJ.

    To provide you with some backgroud of how I got into this unfortunate situation - I was working away, minding my own business and this ESTJ male decided to make and hold eye contact with me and it all went down hill from there. How is it possible for someone to feel so much chemistry and sexual tension and for it to be one-sided? Surely that is not possible - it just does not make sense!

    I have not approached him or told him my feelings about him, but we work very closely together and I have given him my attention and even started conversations with him about things OTHER than work - this is HUGE and I feel like its a big sign that I like him.

    The relationship will never work but the chemisty and sexual tension is so stong it is driving me crazy. I need to cut out the distractions so I can get back to work.

    Give me all your tips on how I can get get over this crush PLEASE and I will forever be in your debt.
    That happened to me too. Some ESTJ dude was walking by and made really long eye contact with me. Only difference is I felt really uncomfortable and promptly accelerated my pace in an attempt to leave the building before the next minute came to pass.

    Just recognize that it is a thing that is happening and you can't do anything about it, chose what you want the outcome to be (it sounds like you don't want a relationship), and then prioritize things that will get you those results. If you don't want a relationship then stop trying to build one.
    lilysocks thanked this post.

  8. #8

    I’m curious why you say the relationship will never work @Girl333

    Is he...married?

    And yeah. Nothing hotter than a Te dom. It’s the confidence factor I think. ENTJs are better though. But that’s my biased opinion.
    ponpiri, Blue Flower and FlaviaGemina thanked this post.

  9. #9

    One-sided sexual attraction is entirely possible. Just ask them people that are in love with bridges, goats and dolls and shit.

    That dude doesn't know you like him. We understand that initiating conversation and showing unnecessary attention is a big deal, but for outsiders that's just everyday business lol

    Are you sure you wanna give before before the game has begun?? If so, get busy and stay busy.
     
    You may even need to jack off before work or find a fwb cuz it sounds like you got a bad itch.
    jtour and FlaviaGemina thanked this post.

  10. #10

    Quote Originally Posted by Raconteur View Post
    I’m curious why you say the relationship will never work @Girl333

    Is he...married?

    And yeah. Nothing hotter than a Te dom. It’s the confidence factor I think. ENTJs are better though. But that’s my biased opinion.

    I don't know why Girl333 thinks a relationship would never work but as a person who's had a crush on an ESTJ I can say I support the opinion a INTJ-ESTJ relationship seems super difficult to me.

    I found "my" ESTJ really cute and his dominance quite enticing, but his lack of thinking attitude towards life, inability to discuss using logical arguments, and following rules unconditionally makes me think I would hate being with him. Also for me that's an "affair material" but not "relationship material".

    How to get over an ESTJ crush? Don't. Come up with a plan how to conquer him and realize it :) Then you will get over him the moment he starts talking rubbish and being shallow.
    Last edited by TheTraveller7; 02-22-2018 at 12:40 PM.
    Raconteur thanked this post.


     
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