[INTJ] The (stream of conscious?) venting thread for INTJ. - Page 3549

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This is a discussion on The (stream of conscious?) venting thread for INTJ. within the INTJ Forum - The Scientists forums, part of the NT's Temperament Forum- The Intellects category; ginger biscuits, greek salad and gummie bears. today's food groups brought to you by the letter g. what am i, ...

  1. #35481

    ginger biscuits, greek salad and gummie bears. today's food groups brought to you by the letter g.

    what am i, sesame street? also, gee i love working from home. aka: i sent a flame bomb as my final act of the day and now i'm scared to go the site tomorrow.

    i'm long over my rage though i know it was justified AND that its cause is still there. so. i will go in tomorrow and act like i'm not having the second thoughts that i have. they might not even guess that i am. so i'll go in, act normal [HAHAHAHAHAHA] and wait and see if they blink first.

    edit: it felt really good though. not going pretend it didn't. i didn't even swear or call names or anything. i just said 'i am not even going to work on this thing till you do what we've asked you for months now to do.'
    Sela thanked this post.

  2. #35482

    I want to love Trexels 2, I really do. It's all things Star Trek in 8-bit form. I'd say "what's not to love," but I think there must have been an interaction in the development stage in which someone said "charming" and what was heard was "farming". The graphics are, in fact, charming, the combat is mildly entertaining, but the resource generation just gets tedious, especially the constant attempts to get you to pay real money. It makes me so sad, I'd love to have a good Star Trek game (that's also free), and 8-bit pleases me to no end. I'm a fairly generic geek. I don't have the memory for trivia or the talent for costumes or the money for collectibles. But if I'm a specific geek for anything, it's unquestionably Star Trek (Next Gen in particular; I want to love the original, but I just don't). I have yet to see Discovery because I don't have a TV, but through the power of Netflix I've seen everything else (including the animated series, it's worth watching if only for the elephant-sized pink tribble rolling through the scene behind a Klingon captain who takes himself very seriously), it was actually why I got it in the first place. I just wish streaming had the cool stuff the DVDs had (I had a membership before they even had streaming, and I really miss the DVDs sometimes).

  3. #35483

    Quote Originally Posted by TheTraveller7 View Post
    That's not a reason for women to show off their boobs and men their cars (or for that matter) to stress their tallness in their profiles.
    i found that really grating when i was trawling a 'dating' thing for platonic telephone friends years ago. like, really grating. although to be honest, when i was doing it the one that grated me even worse was the 'here's my financial status, not that you asked or that it's business of yours.'

    i had more conversations about that, actually . and about why i don't care and don't want to know and please keep those facts in your pants. a really MAJOR number of men hung up on me when i pointed out how many men want it both ways. can't go around griping about gold-digging women the way that they do, when that is the way that they choose to id themselves.

    i didn't have any patience for it. yes, i get there's a sort of identity vacuum that you hang in and i get that society offers and yes, expects these lame auto-identifiers from everybody. i'd say, you're talking to a woman, buddy. what makes you think i can't feel you wondering how much i weigh? but the bottom line is, if you don't like the game of packaged identities then don't be trading on them your own self.

    i made a couple of friends in that phase . weeded out all the not-likely ones pretty fast.
    Sela thanked this post.

  4. #35484
    ISTJ - The Duty Fulfillers

    Quote Originally Posted by Napoleptic View Post
    Trek stuff
    I refuse to pay for CBS access to watch Discovery or any other Trek. I don't pay for cable television, Netflix, Hulu, a satellite dish, or anything else similar. I have always loved Trek but I have felt a giant disconnect (changing times? people? values?) since the early 2000's. Having said that, I'm still a geek at hear and can speak fluent Rihannsu (Romulan) and in fact used it once to fend off some annoying drunks out in Las Vegas back in the mid-90's:

    Them, clearly tanked: What time is it?
    Me: /decides to have some fun with these losers/
    Them: Time? Tiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiiime???
    Me: Phralae dhat lloannen'galae (I don't speak English).
    Them: /pointing at my watch/
    Me: /my watch is still set for Eastern Time, rather than Pacific, so it's three hours ahead of the local time/
    Them: Oh s**t!!! We're late!! /they run out and spill beer everywhere/
    Me: /walks to elevator and gets on/
    Woman in elevator, talking to friend: Did you just see that?
    Me, to woman: English is my native language. I decided to have some fun with those bozos.
    Woman, and her friend: OMG, I'm gonna pee my pants /both laugh really hard/
    Napoleptic and lilysocks thanked this post.

  5. #35485
    INTJ - The Scientists

    I feel like I'm utterly ready to either lose my mind or just throw up my hands and scream "I quit!"

    So, with my job, there are a million little things going on. For about 90% of what I do, I'm just the proverbial "middle-man" but because of that, it's my head that is held to the flames when something doesn't go right or someone else decides it should have been handled differently. The 10% I actually control tends to get a bit lost in the mix of hundreds of things I am responsible for (but can't actually control).

    The client and account I work on has historically been a bit dysfunctional when it comes to communications and policies in how the different groups work together. Some of that is the nature of the beast (a massive Fortune 5 company that is built on a significant number of acquisitions), and some of it has been very loosey-goosey or lack of policies regarding, oftentimes, little things - issue being, those little things turn into big things.

    Most of the time I'm pretty good at just solving problems and moving on, but with a pending contract renewal between the client and my company, things are being looked at under a microscope, and things that normally might cause a little stress but wouldn't be a huge deal are now turning into huge deals. Doesn't help when the new client-side leadership is looking for any opportunity to point out even the tiniest of mistakes.

    Mind you, we are talking about a real estate portfolio of nearly 1200 leases and properties that my group "manages." We house and maintain all the documents, process all the rent and lease payments, the Facilities payments for a large portion of the portfolio, and all the the invoices, documents, etc that come along with that. We also must ensure no document is signed without everything being in order, and then executed by the proper people, returned, and into our systems properly. There are no less than 5 different business units within the mega-company that we have to work with.

    We are a team of 2 people "on site" (sitting in one of the client's corporate offices) and 4 people at my company's hub location in Tennessee. If any one, teensy-tiny thing goes slightly wrong, and it makes it across the client's desk (for example, a Landlord reaches out to them rather than to us if their payment wasn't what they expected), then our feet are held to the flames and the questions start flying, and the accusations are happily tossed around.

    Most of this is kind of normal, but over the past 1 1/2 years, there have been dramatic changes in the company and in my department specifically, and now the headquarters move (from CA to TX) has people leaving in droves, plus the new leadership (in no small part due to the HQ move) in this department making sweeping changes across the entire real estate team means everyone is on edge.

    Myself included.

    They are looking for people to throw under the bus, and me being ms middleman + that whole "$h!t rolls downhill" thing means I'm catching WAY more than my fair share of the crap. Due to how our leadership wants things handled (which on one hand I can understand) it means that any screw ups by anyone in my team (on site or at the company hub) makes it look like it's my fault.

    I'm seriously at a loss on how to track everything - there are literally hundreds of things every day that come across my desk, I am incapable of following up and tracking every single one of them, but feeling like I have to or else risk getting fired if something really goes sideways...(no one has threatened or made innuendos even remotely along that line, but in the modern corporate culture it's a fear I have if things aren't going perfectly). There is almost a zero tolerance for even the smallest of mistakes.....
    Sela, sherkanner, EyesOpen and 2 others thanked this post.

  6. #35486

    I found a half marathon event just far away enough for it to be realistic to train for and close by enough location wise to be able to travel to it in a brief weekend getaway. It’s the week after my birthday so I could make it a birthday trip.

    Now all I have to do is work on SO so that he also thinks it’s a great idea and make it happen.

    My new mum friend stopped by today. The one who has a psychic. It’s funny how having kids who get along makes it easier to chat to someone who is otherwise a world away from you in just about every way possible.
    Sela, Coonsy, lilysocks and 1 others thanked this post.

  7. #35487

    so there's a production of lucia di lammermoor out there that's, uh . . . out there.

    of course i had to be at work when youtube finished one thing and decided to show it to me. i just let it run on in the background because i'm in the work-it-in phase. i've heard florez and mosuc, moffo and . . . bergonzi?, scotto and bergonzi, bits of florez and someone forgettable. i took a peek at this one and it wasn't performers i want to watch as well as hear. and then as others stream past me on their way out the end-of-day door i do figure i'll watch some of it too. and it turns out to be the probably-only production on the planet so far that features a quickie in the first act. a *flinch* damned real looking one too, way too real for my blood. oh god.

    i came home tonight and read about it. and then i actually watched [most of] it. just finished, and it's actually really good. like, good as a conception, though the singing isn't the first thing that takes up your mind. i wouldn't have thought it could be re-invented so convincingly, so i'm impressed. but oh god. i'm going back to jdf and the nice whats-that-painter's-name-again-starts-with-m-not-matisse minimalist production instead. you'd never find jdf getting it on with a stranger onstage.

    magritte. that's the painter. i looked him up via 'ceci n'est pas 'n pipe' and there he was. i'm just so cultured tonight. i love the magritte-army chorus right at the end of the production i'm talking about. i love the whole scene.

    i could be wrong about this being the only blah blah on the planet. just read a guardian review where the person who saw the graphic production said this

    "if I see one more couple humping in time to the orchestra I will reach for a rosary. It’s the oldest cliche in the book. Please think of another."

    i'm like, O_O it is? O_O obviously i'm not as up on opera lore as i thought.
    Last edited by lilysocks; 08-20-2019 at 10:58 PM.

  8. #35488

    Was walking behind a crippled old man yesterday and as he turned to sit down, he tripped and fell flat on the ground. I rushed to help him, but this lady came out of the store and yelled, "Don't do it! Not him."

    I was too confused to do anything and so he got up on his own. Selfishly, I was somewhat relieved not to have to help, what if he's a perv or something?

    Still, is it right for a person to forbid another from helping a human being in need?

    I should probably put myself out there more to help people, but I lack conviction. We're too used to people having to sort their own problems, and that is sad, though.
    Sela, Napoleptic, Coonsy and 4 others thanked this post.

  9. #35489

    Deleted the game from my phone. It was getting too distracting. However, I did notice something interesting. The mindset of planning ahead and doing things in a particular order (not in order of immediate importance but also in a way that prepares some things for others and gets more benefit out of doing things in a certain way) seemed to be spilling over into my personal life. I was listing stuff that needed to get done and seeing what I could do now, what I could do while I was waiting on some things (do research, look up phone numbers, etc.), what needed to be done in a particular order, etc.

    You know that magic moment in the kitchen where you've timed everything perfectly so that you've got a constant stream of action where everything gets completed just as it's needed so there's no standing around waiting on one step, and nothing is overlapped or rushed, and the very last cooking stage takes exactly as long as washing up the last dirty dish—where everything just happens with perfect timing? That's what it felt like. I rather enjoyed it. I might be a hell of a lot more productive if I could implement that into mundane tasks. Honestly I'm not even sure what's fun about that. Perhaps just the satisfaction of feeling clever? I dunno.

    It's particularly strange given that I absolutely hate multitasking. Or at least how a previous (horrible, horrible) boss used it against me (glad you can talk on the phone while researching and doing data entry, but I'm not an ESFJ like you and interaction with a human, even (or maybe especially) over the phone, takes my full concentration; sorry not sorry). I guess it's totally different when it's on my terms and I'm not being micromanaged.

    Would be great if I simply just wanted to complete things so I can cross them off the list like a normal human being, as opposed to spending so much time and concentration on making the process of completion as efficient and elegant as possible. There are times when the process is really important, but most of the time it's better to just get shit done, you know?

    I have done it a bit with work and laid out eight windows in a specific order for during editing and then when I'm getting ready to upload files to a remote server and a web platform once the edits are complete. The screens get a bit cluttered (again, would love to have a third monitor even though I can get by just fine without it), but it eliminates hunting down folders and figuring out which window they're in at each stage along the way in a way that doesn't make for horrible lag (working with two windows via VPN sometimes doesn't play well with the file explorer), and—more importantly—it also helps to make sure I've ticked all my boxes.
    Coonsy, lilysocks, EyesOpen and 1 others thanked this post.

  10. #35490
    INTJ - The Scientists

    Pretty sure I'm just getting stressed out. Some of it residual from the move (still really missing "my" circle, even as small as it was, and definitely getting into that "homesick" phase of just wanting familiar places/people), some of it work (okay, maybe a lot of it, but that's been stressful for awhile, just in different ways), and some of it just the changes to my schedule (which are good, but not what I'm used to, and there's a bit of a mild burnout factor going on).

    About ready to just hole up for a week and not talk to anyone. Actually, that's not a terrible idea - I've got enough PTO, I could do a little stay-cation and just veg out at home with the cats for a few days. Keep up my workouts and stuff but add the work/commute hours back into my days. Sleep in.

    So my routine used to be: get up, workout, prep for work, work, home, chill/eat, bed (with some reading). For about 4 months before the move, the morning workouts weren't happening either, and it was just work during the week.

    Now, my routine is similar, but I've added in evening/weekend activities such as the martial art (2-3x/week if I go to all the classes), riding the horses (1-3x/week depending on weather/schedule), bicycling (1x/week on the weekend if I'm not at the track), and getting together with my one friend out here maybe once a week.

    This week I just have zero desire to go to my martial arts class even though I missed it last week due to schedule and racing. The horses are easier as I find that more relaxing (doesn't require a ton of brain power since I rode and trained horses most of my life), whereas the martial art is trying to memorize things, remember things, learn new things, etc) but it's been too hot in the evenings to ride, and TBH, I'm kind of relishing the idea that my friend is busy tonight and I can just sit at home, guilt free, being frumpy with my cats....


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