[INTJ] Testing people

Testing people

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This is a discussion on Testing people within the INTJ Forum - The Scientists forums, part of the NT's Temperament Forum- The Intellects category; Do you make people go trough series of tests while trying to get to know them? Like finding if they're ...

  1. #1
    INTJ - The Scientists

    Testing people

    Do you make people go trough series of tests while trying to get to know them? Like finding if they're worth your time?

    I mean like testing ability to notice sarcasm and other similiar tests.

    I tend to ask questions regarding their morals etc, how they think about certain stuff - I'm very picky about the people i let near me..

    ( Sorry if my english is incorrect, feel free to correct me. I'm interested to learn better english! )
    Space Cat, mickey, TurquoiseBlue and 1 others thanked this post.



  2. #2
    Unknown Personality

    I do this all the time. I make them pass through series of tubes and loops and labyrinths to see how they fare and what info I can extract from them (that they might not even be aware they are giving out!). And very similarly to you as well, my main aim is usually finding out their ethical qualities, as it is very important for me to associate with like-minded people in this regard.

  3. #3
    INTJ - The Scientists

    I don't test people as in giving them some sort of trial they have to "pass," but I do occasionally provoke people just to see how they'll respond--there's no right or wrong answer. I'm just curious. Also, I think I like giving people the opportunity to rise above their own insecurities or limited ideas about themselves. I will frequently fail to be polite in conversation, because I kind of want people to see their own strength in their ability to disagree with me or call me out if I've said something offensive. Is that weird?
    Keno, CounterPoint, Rose Belle and 4 others thanked this post.

  4. #4
    ENTP - The Visionaries

    I think we all do it... we try to ask questions to find out their "values" and if they don't match with ours, most of the times we part ways.
    White River thanked this post.

  5. #5
    INTJ - The Scientists


    Not really. I think the most I do is exaggerate aspects of my personality so they can choose if they want to deal with me or not. So they don't come in blind.
    Luciano, Lav and TurquoiseBlue thanked this post.

  6. #6
    INTJ - The Scientists

    Quote Originally Posted by steventaylor View Post
    I think we all do it... we try to ask questions to find out their "values" and if they don't match with ours, most of the times we part ways.
    I agree. Whether it's conscious or subconscious, we behave in the way that we do, and if there's a response to something we do that we don't like then test failed.
    TurquoiseBlue thanked this post.

  7. #7
    INTJ - The Scientists


    I guess I do, sort of. It's not conscious nor deliberate. What it is, is I pay attention. So, while I don't have a test, per se, they are still passing or failing on some level. For example, if someone says "I'll be at your home at 9:15 to view the article you have for sale and they call at 10:15 to say they are late (duh), they will NEVER become a friend. That one instance of being late with an hour delayed call tells me many things and everything I need to know. And, it has nothing to do with whether or not I care about them being on time. The fact that they weren't on time and how they handled it become the
    "clues" and give away what this person is and isn't about. Incidentally, whatever it was I had for sale, would no longer be available to this person to buy, either.
    Orion thanked this post.

  8. #8
    INTJ - The Scientists

    Here is another INTP/INTJ difference (sorry to hijack another thread.) For me, I will challenge you to keep up with my sarcasm and my intuitive leaps of reason. The point at which you can no longer keep up with that is a sort of categorization that you would fall under. So yeah, more a scale than a pass or fail for me.

    There are other things that also help me determine what level of friendship I would want to have with you, like how much respect you have for me and how much space you are willing to give me, but I think that most people also have those considerations.

  9. #9
    Unknown Personality

    No, human social relationships are complicated enough as it is and the last thing I want to make someone feel is as if they need to impress me by "passing" some sort of test. I admit, I did use to do something like it when I was younger but over time I realized that people do not want to get close to you if you make them feel like they are not worthy of your presence. It just seemed so rude and condescending, to purposely provoke someone then critique their responses if they did not respond accordingly to your arbitrary guidelines. I understand in wanting to be around individuals that are similar to oneself, and like a poster mentioned above it is something we all do whether conscious or not, but I prefer it when people reveal themselves to me at their own pace and time. Such unprovoked revealing of the self, shows that they trust and respect me enough to show who they really are without worrying about being judged, or through my own provocations.
    Ormazd, st0831, TheWaffle and 5 others thanked this post.

  10. #10
    INTJ - The Scientists


    Quote Originally Posted by listentothemountains View Post
    Here is another INTP/INTJ difference (sorry to hijack another thread.) For me, I will challenge you to keep up with my sarcasm and my intuitive leaps of reason. The point at which you can no longer keep up with that is a sort of categorization that you would fall under. So yeah, more a scale than a pass or fail for me.

    There are other things that also help me determine what level of friendship I would want to have with you, like how much respect you have for me and how much space you are willing to give me, but I think that most people also have those considerations.
    There is no valid "test" here, it's just a demonstration of your hostility toward others and your self-import view, and then you make a fool of yourself in front of INTJs seeking a pat on the back that you're not likely to get.

    If we value people, thus the honesty, straightforwardness, and lack of willingness to manipulate other's feelings, why would you think you will get kudos from us for this unwarranted and disrespectful demonstration of you being deliberately mean to people to feed your false ego?

    Here's a tip: If you actually take the time to find value in other people, you might find that your ego gets stroked in the process, and for the bonus feature, if you find yourself being kind to someone you and others would typically dismiss, someone else will likely notice and pat you on the back. There ya go. A double-whammy for the self-serving.


     
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