[INTJ] Excerpts from everyday conversation - Page 390

Excerpts from everyday conversation

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This is a discussion on Excerpts from everyday conversation within the INTJ Forum - The Scientists forums, part of the NT's Temperament Forum- The Intellects category; 4 year old: -holding up cardboard gauntlet we just made- The different buttons do different things. INTJ: What does the ...

  1. #3891

    4 year old: -holding up cardboard gauntlet we just made- The different buttons do different things.
    INTJ: What does the blue button do?
    4 year old: Um... the blue one lets you fly.
    INTJ: Ah! I’d press it.
    4 year old: Yes, it is impressive.
    Dalien, lilysocks, EyesOpen and 1 others thanked this post.

  2. #3892

    *ENTJ and INFJ sit down at pizzeria*
    INFJ: I wonder if this place accepts cards.
    ENTJ: What place wouldn't?
    INFJ: This place is, uhh... I better check Google maps for an ATM.
    ENTJ: It's full of old people, sure, but they do know their stuff. I'm betting this place is authentic.
    INFJ: It seems kinda.. weird.
    *Italian guitar music starts playing*
    INFJ: OMG, Italia! I'm certain now that you're right.

  3. #3893

    automation guy who i think is a co-intj: what's this?
    me: doughnuts
    agwitiac-i: i can see they're doughnuts [idiot]. what are you doing bringing doughnuts in here?
    me:
    ag: it's a terrible act. *takes three doughnuts* and here i thought i could trust you and everything
    me: now now, you know i'm only trying to help you with your designer-chocolate habit.
    ag: oh right. "here. you're drinking too much coffee. have some crack cocaine." thanks a lot. *takes extra doughnut, retreats*


    footnote: ten days later he shows up with a box of doughnuts crying "REVENGE!!!" in exactly the voice of michael palin from fish called wanda. it took an extremely long time for this guy to loosen up but boy has it been worth waiting for.
    Elspeth and EyesOpen thanked this post.

  4. #3894

    Quote Originally Posted by brightflashes View Post
    Me: I saw a really cool looking tree at the beach earlier today and wondered if you could tell me what kind it is?
    Turi: Yeah, sure, I just need to see it to be able to tell you.

    ::2 days later in the car::

    Me: *points* There, right there what is that called?
    Turi: Hmm? Oh. That's a tree.
    Sounds about as helpful as this guy:

    Last edited by Napoleptic; 10-10-2019 at 12:38 PM.
    brightflashes and Squirt thanked this post.

  5. #3895

    intj: theoretically i am aware that it's dinner time.
    intp: that's fine. i'm not that hungry anyway.

    it's sort of a wonder really that we're still alive.
    EyesOpen, Squirt and AnneM thanked this post.

  6. #3896

    snort. my counsellor is an emigrant too. much much more recent than me.

    me: well; back then this was a pretty hick town. so you got all these people brainlessly pressuring you to say canada is the greatest country that ever was, and how ecstatic you are to dump everything and somehow find yourself here.
    him: ...and that's changed?
    EyesOpen and Squirt thanked this post.

  7. #3897

    INFJ - son (age 30's -- history of being "ungrounded") calling on phone, a rare event.

    "Hello. Dad. I just called to tell you I'm getting married."

    INTJ - father (very grounded fellow)

    "Oh. Yea. That's nice to hear."

    INFJ - son.

    "Yea. You know. I'm getting my life together."

    INTJ - dad.

    "That's nice to hear. I'm glad you called."

    INFJ - son.

    "Okay. I gotta go now 'cause I'm at work."

    INTJ - dad.

    "Okay. I'm glad you called."

    INFJ - son.

    "Yea yea. All good news. Gotta Go. Bye." (hangs up)

    *I think the INTJ (dad) is quickly assessing what is the best thing to say, while the INFJ is trying to deliver the message in the quickest way possible and exit as fast. Likely given it long though beforehand. Maybe 8 beers or so.
    Last edited by Kamuela; 10-14-2019 at 06:29 PM.
    Squirt and Negotiator thanked this post.

  8. #3898

    Girl talk.

    ENFP: Oh, I thought you were looking at that guy who just went by.
    INTJ: Nope. Why, was he attractive?
    ENFP: Yes, he was.
    INTJ: I'm sorry I missed it.
    ENFP: -giggles-
    ESTJ: -shows up- What, are you horny?
    INTJ: Eh?
    ESTJ: Yeah, you come here looking innocent but I bet you're kinkier than all of us combined.
    INTJ: … I have no response to that.
    ENFP: Ooh, she is freaky!
    ESTJ: Let me see your arms. Give me your arms -examines wrists- Hmm...
    ENFP: She probably has those soft Velcro ones.
    ESTJ: Yeah, no marks.
    INTJ: That would be indiscreet.
    ENFP: What's wrong with that.
    ESTJ: Don't you have a swing, ENFP?
    ENFP: We'd have to move the bed so it would be under a support beam. Then we'd have no room to get around.
    ESTJ: You could still do it.
    ENFP: Nah, it was too much trouble...
    ESTJ: Excuses!
    INTJ: -escapes without notice-
    lilysocks, EyesOpen, intjonn and 2 others thanked this post.

  9. #3899

    Discussion on how a mutual friend is back with an abusive crazy ex

    ENTP: I just don't get it why would someone stay in that kind of relationship...
    INTJ: Well you're still with me after all this time...
    ENTP: But you aren't crazy like that
    INTJ: Yeah I'm my own kinda crazy... You'd tell me if I went overboard crazy right?
    ENTP: Well.....
    INTJ: *profuse sweating*
    ENTP: I'm already crazy so maybe we should get a second opinion before you give me that power
    INTJ:
    EyesOpen and Squirt thanked this post.

  10. #3900

    one for @Napoleptic. really it's none of my business what my colleagues wear, but a) mr product guy will actually discuss clothes like they're interesting, and b) at 8:47 am it all just seems too mockable for me to pass up. he begins to Explain.

    him: it's a . . . like, a -
    me: eh, i get it. it's a rugged individualist thing. one orange button declares your freedom \o/
    him: precisely. well no, perhaps not quite like that.
    me: oh? okay, explain it to me.
    him: and i know he's thinking 'stop that'. it's a . . . like a . . . oh well, come on. you know.
    me: no. i don't.
    him: it's just a THING, okay? just a thing. i can't explain it. he just likes to make the last button a different colour.
    me: like a warning system?
    him: exactly. that's it. you got it. it's a warning.
    me: ...
    him: *looks wary*. okay?
    me: of what?
    him: *headdesk*
    me: you mean like, a kind of Beyond Here Be Dragons type thing?

    i wish now that i hadn't said it. coworker's todgers are the last thing i want to be drawing even theoretical attention to - even potentially theoretical attention. even intp humour-type potentially-theoretical attention. i was just making a sort of generalized kind of flat-earther joke; but like the shirt, i kind of found myself rushing over the edge of the joke before i caught on about where it was taking us to.

    and it's too late now anyway.
    Napoleptic, EyesOpen and Squirt thanked this post.


     

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