[INTP] How to Date (and Interpret) an INTP - Page 2

How to Date (and Interpret) an INTP

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This is a discussion on How to Date (and Interpret) an INTP within the INTP Articles forums, part of the INTP Forum - The Thinkers category; I look at this and go, "Holy cow, him in a nutshell." Time and space, though - how much of ...

  1. #11
    INFP - The Idealists

    I look at this and go, "Holy cow, him in a nutshell."
    Time and space, though - how much of that should I give him?
    Fern, Fern, Fern and 28 others thanked this post.

  2. #12
    Unknown Personality

    Quote Originally Posted by Pinkgnomie13 View Post
    I look at this and go, "Holy cow, him in a nutshell."
    Time and space, though - how much of that should I give him?
    as much as it takes :)

    I don't know. I differ with other INTPs on this. Personally, I like being with my girl. Any time, any place. Just as long as she doesn't interfere with my projects or try to make me into a pygmalion project.

  3. #13

    Quote Originally Posted by Pinkgnomie13 View Post
    I look at this and go, "Holy cow, him in a nutshell."
    Time and space, though - how much of that should I give him?
    My bf is an INTP and @grandpa2390 said it well, "as much as it takes."
    (While you're waiting, feel free to log on PerC and grump about it, I do! )

    What I've learned that is of paramount importance in this situation, is this: he will give you signs when he's ready to be "close" again and it's imperative not to "guilt him".

    If you do, it will be most unpleasant.

    If you do not, you'll see an even closer "closeness" develop within the relationship.

    Note to INTP's reading this: only another "feeler" is going to understand the terminology closer "closeness".
    Last edited by Mschievious; 10-09-2013 at 09:18 AM. Reason: diamonds in platinum
    Seamaid, grandpa2390, grandpa2390 and 74 others thanked this post.

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  5. #14
    INTJ - The Scientists

    Thanks for this article! It describes my darling INTP husband (and our courtship) to a T.
    Fern, Fern, Fern and 42 others thanked this post.

  6. #15

    This is like my autobiography, scary as hell.
    Tophthetomboy thanked this post.

  7. #16

    If you're having a rough emotional day, do not count on them (an INTP) to consistently be supportive. They'll have times they will and times they won't.

    It's at the times they won't that you as a non-INTP must remember and believe the good and do not, I repeat do not go sharing your emotional distress on someone who will side with you and say how awful the INTP is and then proceed to coddle/pacify you.

    The INTP is not awful, they're doing what they can. So take the day and do what you can to nurture yourself.

    This is easier on some days than others......


    ( @Pinkgnomie13 here's a primary example of me coming on here, PerC, to grump/vent without grumping/griping at him because I understand how he functions........... )
    Last edited by Mschievious; 10-14-2013 at 10:39 AM. Reason: diamonds in platinum
    Fern, Fern, Fern and 13 others thanked this post.

  8. #17
    INTP - The Thinkers

    Quote Originally Posted by Pinkgnomie13 View Post
    I look at this and go, "Holy cow, him in a nutshell."
    Time and space, though - how much of that should I give him?
    this seems relative.... to a certain degree:

    Abnormaldiversity: Aloof Affection

    not necessarily always a how much... but what kind

    maybe.

  9. #18
    Unknown Personality


    I have something to relate with the INTP behavior...

    I've discovered that once I have committed myself to someone, that I don't really play games. If I see the partner in a bad mood I will ask why they are in a bad mood, and if I did anything to contribute to it. Some of the things I found that will make a death spiral with me is to be angry at me or having blamed something happening on me, while harboring in passive-aggression for a long time, then taking the frustration out on other things that weren't really the primary catalyst for the partner being in a bad mood. To me that's more disrespectful than simply outright chewing me a new one. I would appreciate being chewed out sooner than later; if I get chewed out for things long after they happened and I had perceived it as passive-aggression, and I can't figure out where the anger stems from, I am done. At this point I will feel that the partner has been playing mind games with me. I don't do mind reading. I am not in your shoes on a day to day basis. If something bad happens and you need to talk about it, tell me, because I don't have psychic cameras following you around in areas I am not even in (ex: partner is in school and I don't go to school with him). I have realized if I am to be serious about another relationship, I won't play mind games. Either you tell me or you don't. I will make that clear from the start of the relationship. Maybe this is too rigid thinking but, I take these things as a sign of distrust or playing mind games. If am literally there to see why partner is upset, I'd probably understand. If I am not there, then you have to explain to me what has happened. Also I won't 'hear you out' once I'm played to be the bad guy the whole time without a reason why. Making me feel like this without an honest answer will have me gone with the wind. Why should I hear you out, if I'm the bad one? Not worth my time... This is something I've learned about myself over time and I'm sure other INTP can relate.

  10. #19
    ENFJ


    I wish I had seen this article over a week ago. :( I would have done what it takes to try to meet the INTP's needs.

  11. #20

    This was exactly what I needed, thank you.


     
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