[INTP] It is possible to find true love for INTP?

It is possible to find true love for INTP?

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This is a discussion on It is possible to find true love for INTP? within the INTP Forum - The Thinkers forums, part of the NT's Temperament Forum- The Intellects category; I always have the feeling, there just a little set of women in these world, who is compatible to me? ...

  1. #1

    It is possible to find true love for INTP?

    I always have the feeling, there just a little set of women in these world, who is compatible to me?
    Why I have those thoughts?
    How I can controll these?

    Sorry for my gramma...

    Dan Locked
    GusWriter thanked this post.

  2. #2

    Define "true love" first.
    Then determine if "true love" even exists. For anyone.

  3. #3

    To help what I think love is. I think is more complex of the atraction someone can feel for other person. It means what you can add to the other person, what are you willing to give, etc. Simple. Commitment. So yeah. There is true love but depends on you

  4. #4

    It's an intellectual problem, the compatibility.

    It narrows the possibilities, that's all.
    But they are definitely not 0.

    The alternative is to settle,
    if you prefer the closest thing to love over solitude.
    Stockholmaren, GusWriter, s2theizay and 1 others thanked this post.

  5. #5

    Compatibility is largely about open-mindedness. Chances are good meeting someone open-minded, someone that can accept and appreciate all the good and bad things about you, but the chances are close to zero if you aren't open-minded yourself.

    I think it was male INTPs out of all the introverts that held most marriages according to certain statistics. Not sure exactly what to read out of that as I bet a lot of those INTPs kept remarrying. I suspect a lot of INTPs are perfectionists that never are fully satisfied.

    In the end, the only problem is yourself, and that's something you can always work with, improve. If the odds ever are zero to you, it will only stay that way if you're unwilling/unable to change.

    So yeah, don't let your loneliness influence your thinking. Logically, anyone with an honest wish for it can experience strong reciprocating love; all they need to do is make the right measures, reach out their hand and grasp for it.
    foamonthewaves, Negotiator, INTP1W2 and 3 others thanked this post.

  6. #6

    No worries about the grammar. I think anyone who has been single for any length of time has had these thoughts. And I would venture that these aspects play into that:

    1. It's partially true. I mean, we aren't all compatible. And I don't think it plays down simply to tested personality types, age, cultural/socioeconomic backgrounds, or interests. Those things may play a part at times, but I think we've all seen those perfect matches on paper go up in flames. So, I would venture that to at least some extent varying traits that compliment the other person's could be as important as similar traits.

    2. We're not always ready for a relationship. Whether it is him or her, one of them may not be in a place where they can give, share, compromise, risk, etc. The same couple may be perfect for each other two years later, but at the present doomed to fail. Also, factor in the screwed up views many of us have at times and may not ever let loose of, then you have a factor that could always throw a wrench in the works.

    3. This relates to 2. and possibly also to @HeadofHudet 's point on open mindedness: You have to be willing to accept and often embrace another person's differences. Even two INTPs could be vastly different in how they approach some things in life. Often these things are little, but I've witnessed some couples get in vicious fights over something as simple as where to put the tupperware lids.(Letting small things go is very important) Expecting someone to be just like you, or always see things your way will always lead to conflict. Yet we all do it to some extent. Perhaps this is not where you are, but maybe the chicas you are considering are there.

    If finding the right person was easy, everyone would have it and there'd be no divorces. Don't settle, or give up. It will come.
    Last edited by GusWriter; 07-24-2018 at 11:57 AM.
    HeadofHudet, foamonthewaves, Jonn and 8 others thanked this post.

  7. #7
  8. #8

    theoretically, yes.

  9. #9

    You're feeling overwhelmed by all the incompatible women and all the things that could go wrong (she won't like the way I dress, I don't earn enough money, etc.), as well as society's expectations. This is backwards. You should be focusing on what you want. Try this:

    Make a list of what would make a woman seem "compatible" with you. Intelligent, lazy, same demographic as you, loves watching movies all night, doesn't want kids, doesn't care about money--whatever suits you, no matter how strange it might seem to others. Then be ready when that woman crosses your path.
    Sygma thanked this post.

  10. #10

    @srgwriter and @HeadofHudet nailed it. I think a lot of what they have to say goes for more than just INTP types.

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