[INTP] INTPs how do you show love to a crush?

INTPs how do you show love to a crush?

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This is a discussion on INTPs how do you show love to a crush? within the INTP Forum - The Thinkers forums, part of the NT's Temperament Forum- The Intellects category; I always show love to a crush by helping them excessively or making quasi "intellectual" conversation about general nonsense and ...

  1. #1
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    INTPs how do you show love to a crush?

    I always show love to a crush by helping them excessively or making quasi "intellectual" conversation about general nonsense and observations all the while constantly asking her questions. if it's a conservative Muslim girl, I don't chit chat, I just make an excuse to say "salam!" (hello, goodbye, peace, etc. muslim equivalent of "shalom") or make an excuse to help her out

    Does that sound like an INTP?

    What do you do?



  2. #2

    People have their somewhat unique preferences for approaching crushes especially INTPs. I wouldn't worry about trying to fit into one category.

    I personally avoid crushes since they tend to lead to relationships. Independence is a huge part of me and I would hate to give up some of it. Even the thought of having someone in my house invites unpleasant thoughts.

    About the crushes I have fallen for the hardest (2), I tend to seek them out, but one was my first crush ever and the other was during a depressive period. It's hard for me to say how I act around these types of crushes.

    It was one of the two things I chose not to explore about myself.

  3. #3

    By doing whatever's in my power to help them grow.
    I make observations of what's positive, guide them to work on what needs work, try to get to know them thoroughly and treat their comfort and happiness as an extension of my own
    JennyJukes, The Poet and SummerRoads thanked this post.

  4. #4

    Quote Originally Posted by SimplyEnigmatic View Post
    I personally avoid crushes since they tend to lead to relationships.
    I avoid crushes because they tend to lead to heartbreak. I always feel incomplete while I'm single, and I'm single a lot.

  5. #5
    Unknown

    Quote Originally Posted by Nell View Post
    By doing whatever's in my power to help them grow.
    I make observations of what's positive, guide them to work on what needs work, try to get to know them thoroughly and treat their comfort and happiness as an extension of my own
    Totally agree, that's how my software works. Also the average reaction to that is the road to dormate and taking you for granted. At least until the silent cold steel door slam of dettachment is applied to that individual.


    Crushes need vulnerability, vulnerability allows a lot of fantastic things but painfull shit storms are always a potential phenomena.


    A lot of energetic investment is required, also most of the time they require me to do the active engaging. So how do i approach crushes? I overthink them until they disolve.
    The Poet and RoseAX thanked this post.

  6. #6

    Quote Originally Posted by Tijaax View Post
    I overthink them until they disolve.
    Never has worked for me. Thinking about them just increases my curiosity....that's never good. Curiosity is pretty much tantamount to desire with crushes.
    What does work for me is simply getting to know them. As I do, I unearth red flags, and when I do, the crush becomes repulsion and I'm free.
    s2theizay thanked this post.

  7. #7

    We don't, unfortunately.

  8. #8
    Unknown


    I got a hint yesterday my crush may like me. But seriously, impossible, why would anyone like me? Basically, I was acting overly apologetic, and despite us both being Muslim and coming from a conservative gender boundaries culture, I told her I was very glad to see her again, and on the way out, her and her friend got real excited the way girls do. and screamed a bit, excitedly. or was i imagining. anyway i had to edit, personal details involved. EDIT: maybe they were getting nervous and venting off? EDIT: I'm not sure that they screamed, I think they were just talking excitedly.
    Last edited by The Poet; 01-05-2019 at 05:09 AM.

  9. #9
    Unknown


    Anyway I don't think I'm ready for a relationship anyway. I value my personal space and independence and free time too much. I only crush on girls and beat around the bush because my Muslim beliefs dictate i cant share how i feel. And I haven't finished college yet, so im waiting until after college. after college, i can court all i want!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! (after a steady income, too)

  10. #10
    Unknown


    Quote Originally Posted by Trumpyhose View Post
    We don't, unfortunately.
    I thought that was more INFPs?


     
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