[INTP] INTPs and dating

INTPs and dating

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This is a discussion on INTPs and dating within the INTP Forum - The Thinkers forums, part of the NT's Temperament Forum- The Intellects category; I am very curious about INTPs and dating. So I am left with this question for the INTP women. Assuming ...

  1. #1
    ISTJ - The Duty Fulfillers

    INTPs and dating

    I am very curious about INTPs and dating. So I am left with this question for the INTP women.

    Assuming we were to go out on a date -

    1. Where would we go?
    2. Who is driving?
    3. Any special requirements?



  2. #2
    INTJ - The Scientists

    My favorite first date ever we went diving and fishing. It was a beautiful thing on many levels. There was organized activity, we had to rely on each other, he got to demonstrate his skill at something, I received new experiences it was fantastic.

    A decent first date was coffee, then bowling, then frisbee in the park. We weren't ready to say goodbye but didn't want to just stare at each other either.

    I really like a structured activity, but an opportunity to actually interact with my date.

    Go to a deli together and pack a picnic, then take a hike.

    Take a cooking class together, food and an activity.

    Bike to a destination, lunch, then bike home.

    I'd probably date more if more dates were like this. I know a nice dinner out is meant as a compliment, but it is also a recipe for disaster as two people meet and make forced polite conversation. I need to connect to my date.

    I don't care who drives, really nothing particular, just don't make any assumptions.

    surprises suck

  3. #3
    Unknown Personality

    Quote Originally Posted by spitzbub View Post
    My favorite first date ever we went diving and fishing. It was a beautiful thing on many levels. There was organized activity, we had to rely on each other, he got to demonstrate his skill at something, I received new experiences it was fantastic.

    A decent first date was coffee, then bowling, then frisbee in the park. We weren't ready to say goodbye but didn't want to just stare at each other either.

    I really like a structured activity, but an opportunity to actually interact with my date.

    Go to a deli together and pack a picnic, then take a hike.

    Take a cooking class together, food and an activity.

    Bike to a destination, lunch, then bike home.

    I'd probably date more if more dates were like this. I know a nice dinner out is meant as a compliment, but it is also a recipe for disaster as two people meet and make forced polite conversation. I need to connect to my date.

    I don't care who drives, really nothing particular, just don't make any assumptions.

    surprises suck
    You sure your INTP?
    NeonBomb and TriggerHappy923 thanked this post.

  4. #4
    Unknown Personality

    1. I like being able to lay down and just talk or listen, preferably outdoors. Perhaps a park? Other than that It'd be fun to spend the day playing video games or discussing books or something.
    2. Who cares?
    3. Don't treat me like I'm a helpless emotional little girl, treat me as your equal. Public displays of affection are fine once in a while, just don't expect me to hald hands with you every minute we're together. I'm quite self centered so questions about me are good, also any philosophical debates. No forced niceness or politeness please.
    Chilln, Promethea, wafflecake and 3 others thanked this post.

  5. #5
    ENTP - The Visionaries

    I don't really go on dates. I wouldn't say I've ever been in a significant long term relationship, but the couple small ones I had it was more we became really good friends then all of a sudden it was like "Huh....we're kind of together now aren't we?" "Yup"
    hubbleINFJ thanked this post.

  6. #6
    INTJ - The Scientists

    Quote Originally Posted by Radiant Flux View Post
    You sure your INTP?
    I am pretty split INTP/INTJ. I think of it as though I am INTJ professionally and INTP personally.

    INTP me doesn't date, I expect to trip over the love of my life, but I am not certain I would notice if I did.

    I have a very strong will, and I work hard at structuring certain parts of my life to move forward. Dating is one of those parts. I don't date much, but when I do I try for the best outcome possible. For me that is using structured events to move forward.

  7. #7
    INFJ - The Protectors


    Quote Originally Posted by spitzbub View Post
    I am pretty split INTP/INTJ. I think of it as though I am INTJ professionally and INTP personally.

    INTP me doesn't date, I expect to trip over the love of my life, but I am not certain I would notice if I did.
    The difference in last letter actually rearranges the entire cognitive ladder:
    INTJ - Ni-Te-Fi-Se
    INTP - Ti-Ne-Si-Fe
    ^ as you can see these types don't have a single cognitive function in common i.e. there is no such thing as INTP/INTJ split - either you are one or the other

    you should read up about functions here MBTI characteristics & 16 Personality Types and here to ENFP Wiki to find out your type - the test can be rather inaccurate
    Promethea, geGamedev, autumnalone and 5 others thanked this post.

  8. #8
    INTP - The Thinkers

    Though I am personally a bit uncomfortable with even stepping into dating territory or anything else involving major emotional commitment, I'll toss my two cents out there.

    1) Wherever. I'm not one for the proverbial dinner and a movie, or anything that involves the emotional discomfort of sitting across from a new person, interview-style. I'd rather go to the park, or just chill at my apartment or theirs. Or maybe share with me some activity you love, and let me know that you're open for my sharing of my interests.

    2) Living in the big city, I either walk, take public transportation, or take a cab somewhere. The culture of driving cars is more or less unknown to me.

    3) Don't try to protect me, dominate me, guide me, et cetera. I (as well as most-- if not all-- INTPs) place incredible value on my autonomy, and I will most certainly react negatively if I feel it's being undermined. I am an individual, and would expect the other party to behave as such as well.
    FreshGreenJello thanked this post.

  9. #9
    INTP - The Thinkers

    Quote Originally Posted by ZC Carbon View Post
    I am very curious about INTPs and dating. So I am left with this question for the INTP women.

    Assuming we were to go out on a date -

    1. Where would we go?
    2. Who is driving?
    3. Any special requirements?
    never would happen for one, I'm married, but just pretending I'm an INTP that isn't:

    First to clarify, do you mean date, as in just hanging out together somewhere to get to know one another in a un-committed manner (as in what friends do, but with the intent of possibly becoming something more)? Or dating as in you are in an actual committed relationship with someone, and are trying to come up with things to do together? In any case I would consider the below appropriate, but I think what other sort of intimate behavior is appropriate depends, along with obviously where the date is taking place, what the nature of the date/relationship between the two people is.

    1. Usually I like to just go somewhere I can eat and/or have coffee. Getting together and playing video games or D&D and that sort of thing works too. Comic book conventions and other similarly nerdy events also is appealing, as are music concerts, assuming it's music that I actually enjoy Going to the latest Sci-Fi, fantasy or horror movie also works.

    2. Unless you are a scary crazy driver, you, because I hate driving, and have to do it way too much (around 500 miles a week, ugg).

    3. Depends on what you consider special requirements I suppose.
    Strelok thanked this post.

  10. #10
    INTP - The Thinkers

    Quote Originally Posted by Thrifty Walrus View Post
    I don't really go on dates. I wouldn't say I've ever been in a significant long term relationship, but the couple small ones I had it was more we became really good friends then all of a sudden it was like "Huh....we're kind of together now aren't we?" "Yup"
    Yeah this is me basically. I prefer to never acknowledge to them that it's going to be a "date"(whatever that is). I just ask a girl if she wants to hang out and do something fun. Being outside somewhere we can just chill or engage in some unique adventure we've never experienced before. It's cool to be friends with no strings attached, and if something happens ...sweet, if not, fuck if I care. Your fantasy worlds will never leave you.
    Thrifty Walrus and wafflecake thanked this post.


     
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