You aren't off base at all. This is what makes me think i am an INFP.Get out of my head. :)
We INFPs DO have a tendency to latch on. And then they consume so much of our energy and time thinking about it, and the situation, and what should I say, and how does he feel, to the point that every conversation ends up elating or depressing you. And trying NOT to analyze every detail of them doing something that SEEMS meaningful (but was it? but he knew that... but i'm reading into...except i told him...) It's not that you don't know what you should do; it's that you can't imagine what would be left behind after.
Lord, I don't think I can say anything to help, because God knows when I've been through this (a lot) nothing anyone said, no matter how reasonable, really made a dent in it until it ran its course one way or another. But GIRL i've been there. Solidarity is a small comfort but a comfort nonetheless. :)
And if I'm totally off base, I'll be crazy over here in my little corner by myself :P