[INTP] Q&A about dating INTPs, and INTP dating: - Page 775

Q&A about dating INTPs, and INTP dating:

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This is a discussion on Q&A about dating INTPs, and INTP dating: within the INTP Forum - The Thinkers forums, part of the NT's Temperament Forum- The Intellects category; ce769866cfafbe312ce237ecd811d195--bojack-horseman-quotes-funny-scenes.jpg...

  1. #7741
  2. #7742

    Hey fellow INTPs: does anyone else go on a purging frenzy after some kind of emotional upheaval?

    I put this down as a dating question since this could crop up most with romantic relationships, but this applies in pretty much any scenario where things have had a chance to build up for awhile with people/someone and then boom, last straw.

  3. #7743

    Quote Originally Posted by Battlelina View Post
    Hey fellow INTPs: does anyone else go on a purging frenzy after some kind of emotional upheaval?

    I put this down as a dating question since this could crop up most with romantic relationships, but this applies in pretty much any scenario where things have had a chance to build up for awhile with people/someone and then boom, last straw.
    Err....I'm guessing you mean purging in the cutting off people sense, rather than the bulimic sense.

    Not a frenzy, but there is something of a "bullshit gauge" that, once full, makes me exhausted to the point I no longer care if the relationship is lost, so I don't hold back criticism anymore.

    The standard result is scorched earth.
    Battlelina thanked this post.

  4. #7744

    Quote Originally Posted by Necrofantasia View Post
    The standard result is scorched earth.
    Oof, yeah, I didn't even realize the bulimic thing. Today I learned.

    I can tell you generally know what I'm getting at, though it's not always about an interpersonal relationship in that sense.

    Example:

    At about 18-19, I remember getting really frustrated about wearing a bunch of clothes I didn't like, felt forced to wear because relatives sent them as gifts and I was expected to wear them or something, so I overhauled my entire closet top to bottom. I had been wearing this stuff for a long time, in some cases well over a year, and I just hit this fever pitch where I was done.

    Normally wouldn't remember this kind of thing, except my ENFJ mom was furious. She wanted me to put everything back, I didn't want to, we butted heads like usual.

    Another example:

    Social media. Again, I spent a really long time feeling divided between "friends" (read: people who wanted me to do stuff for free or who felt I existed solely as their free therapist), and their preferred messaging and social media platforms. I hit this point where I was done. I decided I was going to maintain only two platforms, obliterated the rest of my accounts, and then went and cleaned out the list of the remaining two of connections that I wasn't getting anything out of.

    I would also like to ask, now, if there's a way to tone it down into something more productive for the day-to-day? It's nice when this will cause me to get some huge chunk of project done that's been sitting around for awhile, but I'd like to channel this into something I can use more often.

  5. #7745

    Quote Originally Posted by Battlelina View Post
    Oof, yeah, I didn't even realize the bulimic thing. Today I learned.

    I can tell you generally know what I'm getting at, though it's not always about an interpersonal relationship in that sense.

    Example:

    At about 18-19, I remember getting really frustrated about wearing a bunch of clothes I didn't like, felt forced to wear because relatives sent them as gifts and I was expected to wear them or something, so I overhauled my entire closet top to bottom. I had been wearing this stuff for a long time, in some cases well over a year, and I just hit this fever pitch where I was done.

    Normally wouldn't remember this kind of thing, except my ENFJ mom was furious. She wanted me to put everything back, I didn't want to, we butted heads like usual.
    Yeah, that has happened to me with everything from books to religion. It's basically when your seemingly endless ability to come up with reasons to give something the benefit of the doubt just fizzles out.

    Quote Originally Posted by Battlelina View Post
    Another example:

    Social media. Again, I spent a really long time feeling divided between "friends" (read: people who wanted me to do stuff for free or who felt I existed solely as their free therapist), and their preferred messaging and social media platforms. I hit this point where I was done. I decided I was going to maintain only two platforms, obliterated the rest of my accounts, and then went and cleaned out the list of the remaining two of connections that I wasn't getting anything out of.

    I would also like to ask, now, if there's a way to tone it down into something more productive for the day-to-day? It's nice when this will cause me to get some huge chunk of project done that's been sitting around for awhile, but I'd like to channel this into something I can use more often.
    The only thing I can think of...



    That aside, in trying to harness it for productivity, what I do is set at least one or two priority goals for a given day, without stuffing the entire day so I don't get paralyzed by pressure. On/off success. Motivation is an elusive bitch though.

    Quantification goes a long way for me. S.M.A.R.T goals and all that
    Battlelina thanked this post.

  6. #7746

    Quote Originally Posted by Necrofantasia View Post
    Yeah, that has happened to me with everything from books to religion. It's basically when your seemingly endless ability to come up with reasons to give something the benefit of the doubt just fizzles out.
    Aha, thank you! That's given some food for thought. I always wondered if it was some idealistic/unrealistic side, and since we're in the dating area of the INTP forums, this would be relevant to that. I suppose this side of us is unrealistic, but I imagine this can be tempered somehow.

    Quote Originally Posted by Necrofantasia View Post
    That aside, in trying to harness it for productivity, what I do is set at least one or two priority goals for a given day, without stuffing the entire day so I don't get paralyzed by pressure. On/off success. Motivation is an elusive bitch though.

    Quantification goes a long way for me. S.M.A.R.T goals and all that
    Thanks for the vid link and this very helpful advice. Wish I could give your post more than one thanks, haha. You are not kidding about motivation, though to quote someone wise, "Even if you're falling on your face, you're still moving forward."

    As long as there's some forward momentum I'll take it.


     
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