Hi dear Members, especially ISFJs
I'm a newbie, both at the Cafe and mbti. It has been a couple of weeks I learned about the 16 personalities and eversince have thrown myself into the subject. After a 5 year long relationship with my dear ISFJ there is still a lot to learn and the pieces are slowly coming together.
My person has taught me to be more considerate towards others. They truly are incredible friends that will be there at four in the morning when you need them.Yes, sometimes I do wonder if it is always appreciated the way it should be. But lowering their standards would mean working against their nature.Maintaining harmony and keeping the people they care about happy. Before I get to my point I needed to say what a great trait it is.
Lately I have been keeping a couple of things inside,as to not upset my ISFJ. I try to steer clear of any mundane routine which I feel is capable of giving me a serious heart attack. So I get that my ISFJ feels just as stressed when thinking about a possible talk that could involve uncomfortable feelings. We are in a long distance relationship with monthly visits. I would like to cuddle it out, but this won't be possible for a little while. A month ago I wrote an email. I figured it would signal that there was no need for an instant reply. I wrote it in his language which took more time but was appreciated. (we both know how to speak each other's language but usually rest with mine) It was a very kind and open message. He thanked me for it, clearly happy about its positive note and we continued with our life.The email was forgotten and I didn't feel like bringing it up.I must admit I am scared of being insensitive or too direct. It makes him build up walls.Our interaction stays friendly, but there is this feeling of something being between us for a couple of weeks.
I know it doesn't look like it but I learned a lot while reading through posts,which make a difference in people's lifes and help them see through the eyes of their loved ones with a whole new perspective,thank you.
What is the best way to have a talk without making the other all too uncomfortable, while still being heard?