This is a discussion on ISTP Emotions within the ISTP Forum - The Mechanics forums, part of the SP's Temperament Forum- The Creators category; Originally Posted by Northern Lights Hmm ... tough. Do you have an answer ready? Simplify it: Trade your life for ...
I don't know how to describe my relationship with emotions. They are there but they seem muted most of the time.
The Fi stereotype of being able to recognise every emotion and the 25 different degrees of those emotions is completely alien to me.
I am a very emotional person.
With my wife, in private, I am very emotionally demonstrative. But then she's about the only person who gets to see it. Most people can only guess whether I am 'emotional' or not: for the most part, I just don't think it's their business.
Agreed. The last thing I can think of is to become the source of negativity and the emotions it brings are simply not worth it.
Not afraid of my feelings we are all human but I wouldn't spend much effort trying to sort it out either. I believe I am better off not messing about with my feelings and leave it as it is unless they find their way to me.
I truly appreciate if someone is interested in my troubles (who doesn't?) but I think since we have become so accustomed to thinking through and sorting out our shit by ourselves, it somehow feels "wrong" to share it with others. Not necessarily a matter of weakness but rather .. I don't know. Can't think of the right word for it. "Uncomfortable" is the best I can think of, and my natural response would be trying to deflect it when others show interest. Part of me worries what by sharing my trouble with others it will eventually generate even bigger problems (say it becomes an argument between us instead etc).
I feel it's a broad and ambiguous topic, so I'll try to categorize it by type of emotion.
Happiness - I would say I'm easily and often content. I don't know about pure childlike joy. I think that is fairly rare for me, although I do experience it.
Love - I actually feel like I have a lot of love for people. Maybe not deep love per se, but affection for sure. Whether I express it is a different story but I'm genuinely very fond of many people, and have goodwill toward most.
Sadness - I don't feel sad as much as other people (I think). I don't see a point to feeling sad most of the time. In certain cases where I recognize that I've faced significant disappointment or loss, I give myself a grieving period and I'll even try to make myself sadder so I can have a good cry. Other than that I don't like to feel sad, so I don't. But I'm not immune to it. Even with crappy predictable melodramas like, say, a movie scene where a dog dies, there's a good chance I'll cry. But I hate those types of movies.
Anger - I'm always angry. lol Not necessarily a red hot rage but it's almost like a constant undercurrent in the back of my mind. It's not always bad. It can motivate me to act, get my blood flowing. Usually it's understated, more of annoyance and frustation than anything. It's only gone when I'm completely relaxed and happy, or hyperfocused on something else.
Anxiety - I would describe myself as an anxious person, except when I see people who are crippled by anxiety I realize that I'm not. I do worry about things, like whether I'm doing a good job on something or whether I forgot to lock the door. But at a certain point I find it useless and counterproductive, so I choose to just go on with my day instead of mulling over crap I can't control.
Fear - I'm not fearless, but I probably experience it less than most people. For example, I'm not afraid of bugs or spiders, the dark, or clowns, or heights, or driving on the highway, shit like that. I would say I only get scared if I feel like I'm genuinely in a life-threatening situation and can't control what will happen, like if I'm walking alone in a shady alley in the middle of the night, with questionable characters lurking about. Or like, say if I was being chased by a bear. For me, it's kind of just a natural primal response to danger, a signal to gtfo if I can't handle the situation. I won't feel it strongly if I'm not in genuine danger or if feeling scared is counterproductive, but if I'm in a really tight spot it helps me haul ass faster. But for many people, the emotional response is overexaggerated and they end up feeling afraid of things that are basically harmless, like house spiders.