This is a discussion on What types are an ISTP likely to 'click' with? within the ISTP Forum - The Mechanics forums, part of the SP's Temperament Forum- The Creators category; Originally Posted by Khys i've noticed a lot of gender differentials in the types i hang out with. i do ...
I have an ISTP friend who I talk to on the phone a lot, and this happens all the time. It just depends on what kind of conversation we're having, what we're talking about, etc.NXX... ugh. I have a ENFP friend where the conversation is somewhat forced and there are notable periods where neither of us say anything. Idk, people say ENFX types are the ideal match for ISTPs, but I can never seem to hit it off with them. I blame it on T/F clashing.
I can relate very much to the "never saying anything," although we've had several conversations on the phone that lasted up to 6 hours. It just depends on how passionate I'm feeling about something. I'm not a very good listener, and that's what irks him the most. He's noticed that, and usually keeps kind of quiet. I have to be feeling really open with my emotions and concerns to keep a conversation running, and I have to get ask him about opinions, that sort of things. My only problem is sometime I'm just feeling too self-absorbed to function properly.
I have a lot to say about this issue, so please bear with me. I've been talking to him for four or five years, and we have a kind of odd relationship. We never see eachother, but we just kind of share what's on eachother's minds. I do most of the talking, most of the conversation steering, and I really appreciate hearing his intelligent and knowledgeable thoughts. He does come across as very terse to me sometimes, but I appreciate that far more than false confirmation. It's just sometimes this makes me feel really bad, guilty that I'm not doing my part in the conversation, that sort of thing. I can start subjects kind of easily, but I don't have a natural ability to sustain conversations. Sometimes I don't completely listen to the things he says, whenever I'm not feeling very interested, and he detects this and it has lately made him feel very discouraged. I'm trying to improve myself in this area.
But our conversations about religion and politics are extremely elaborate. I love hearing his opinions about this stuff, and he seems to like sharing his knowledge with me. He knows a lot about things, and I like accumulating trivia over the courses of our conversations. When a conversation isn't going too well, it's usually my own fault, either because I'm too caught up in my work (creative writing) and don't know how to relax, or I don't want to open up my concerns to him because I'm afraid of them being belittled and ridiculed. I think he's great, and I really appreciate his well-developed integrity and honesty, but I just wish he were a little bit more sensitive sometimes. I don't hold this against him, though. I'm usually the one who instigates our conversations, and our communication style works best when I just kind of faucet the things that are on my mind, and let him create a lot of good conclusions.
One other thing: he's very critical about my tastes sometimes, and this sometimes causes me to get defensive.
I usually "click" with anybody who isnt an utter douche.
Last edited by Cloudlight; 11-12-2011 at 04:26 PM.
I prefer F as a function for men, and T as a function for women.
I enjoy Introverts more than Extroverts. I do admit I love ENTJ's though.
one of my best friends is a (confirmed) ISTP. i liked her right away when we met, and ten years later we're very close. she's genuine, honest, caring, and courageous. i love how open and candid she is, and the fact that i can fully trust her. we have the most interesting conversations and can talk for hours without getting bored. she says we come to the same conclusions, but through different ways of thinking. she and i fully understand each other's need for solitude and our friendship works out incredibly smoothly in that respect ~ no conflicts over smothering or need for space...
i also suspect one or both of my brothers are ISTPs and i'm close to both of them.
and i know i'm not the only INFJ who is close to an ISTP. :)
I relate best with anyone who doesn't have an oversized ego. I tolerate best with those who share similar functions of my own. My ESFJ mother and I can get along really great. But there are days when her tone of voice really fucking irritates me. Is her way or the highway for the most part. This is where we clash. ESTJ's are really boring if they have an oversized ego, thankfully my step father is extremely mature, so we are really chill.
ENFJ's are hard to tolerate because they are very structured for the future. Yawn.
ESFP's are great if you want to have a good time. They take nothing serious and can be a big ball of fun. I know three or four IRL.
My ISFP step sister is fucking chill, and we get along really well. I got her back, and she's got mine.
I second the over-sized ego. I'd rather grate my face like cheese than listen to someone with an ego that fills the room. Also when people publicly congratulate themselves routinely, I never say anything. I figure they did enough work for the both of us.
Right now the people I hang out with the most are ENFJ (obviuosly...since im' married to one), ENFP(male), XSTJ(female), ESTP (female), ESFP(male), ENTJ (female)
lol i clearly dont have a problem with extroverts