I'm 32 and have never been in a longer relationship (various reasons for this, don't wanna go into detail). Lately, I’ve found myself opening up more to the possibility of forming a romantic relationship.
Some time ago I met this guy from which after a while I believed he was an ENFJ. He treated me very nicely and seemed quite determined to further the relationship. I really liked to discuss stuff with him, loved his charming, people-friendly attitude… I saw how responsible he was, looking for someone to have a family with etc. I really couldn't say anything bad about him. However, there was no initial spark so I was very insecure whether it was right to continue meeting him. I started to grow fond of him after some months but I was still not sure whether it was «enough»... Unfortunately, I couldn’t figure this out any longer (because I had to move really far away...).
Now there is this other guy who caught my eye. It’s really different with him. From my side there are a lot of sparks and butterflies. I believe he’s an ENFP. He’s an amazing individual, acting like a child many times (good and bad), he’s incredibly funny, playful – whenever I’m with him I feel so light and happy, I can’t stop smiling. We both like music, word plays and laughing about the absurdities of life. I know I can just go and tell him some random stuff and he will understand… But thinking rationally about him makes me doubt whether we would work as a couple. I feel like neither of us would be grounded / emotionally stable enough. Also, when I read about INTP-ENFP compatibility I see there are a lot of pitfalls…
I had the same feelings with other ENFPs before, so I wonder, can it really just be a trap? How can it be that I so easily fall for someone who might not be right for me? Should I really just ignore this feelings because of (good!) rational reasons? Is it advisable to specifically look for J-types when P-types make one's heart sing? If I was younger I would probably just try out both but I feel like I don’t have enough ressources to do that now.
Thanks for your thoughts on this in advance!