How do you approach people?

How do you approach people?

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This is a discussion on How do you approach people? within the Myers Briggs Forum forums, part of the Personality Type Forums category; INTP and I don't know how to "just say something" to people. Though for anyone not that interested in giving ...

  1. #1
    INTP - The Thinkers

    How do you approach people?

    INTP and I don't know how to "just say something" to people.

    Though for anyone not that interested in giving advice to someone who is going to respond to 90% of it with "no, that's not my problem" you can instead just talk about how you do it and we can count the neat trends between personality types.

  2. #2

    I usually make eye contact and smile, that brings the persons defenses down and lets them know that you are open to a conversation. I try to find a nonpersonal reason to talk like "where did you find that book, Video...."

  3. #3
    INTP - The Thinkers

    A year or two I resolved to try to talk to people using whatever they had in their hands but it hasn't helped much. It does happen to be just about the only way people I don't know ever decide to say something to me though.

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  5. #4

    I'm naturally extroverted. You may want to post this question on the "I" forums, eg INTP, INTJ. I think other intoverts will be able to help you out more.

  6. #5
    Unknown Personality

    With a gun and a ski mask...

    I dunno, for me approaching people is easy, but that's mainly because I don't care, at all, what they may think. It makes life so much more enjoyable, many times I intentionally just screw with people, make up some absurd story and than just change the subject. Like..: "Dear god did you see that bird take that man's topee and fly off? Or go up to them asking for change for some monopoly money than curse that the guy at mcdonalds screwed me again

  7. #6
    INTP - The Thinkers

    Oh right, I should stop turning posts that weren't advice into it.

  8. #7
    Unknown Personality

    my advice was simple, just stop caring what people think. I was serious when I said that was how I approached people, not the bit about the ski mask.

    People are much to serious about this sh*t. Who cares if someone you crush on rejects you, what are you going to lose by asking them. Go up and talk to strangers, it's fun. Talking to people should be a natural event and yet everyone lives in their closed off little worlds afraid to make the first contact.

    I am not trying to be offensive, this is just how I am. Although my personality type is up for some debate

  9. #8
    INTP - The Thinkers

    It's much easier to tell myself I should do that than actually do it.

    As I said "I don't know how to just say something to people." After I manage to stop caring people usually really like talking with me but before that point trying to get myself to say much is like-
    well if someone said they couldn't read they wouldn't think advice to "just read the words" was very useful, right?

    I'll try to give a better picture though. I've tried to make myself do that before. The first very literal attempt where I managed to shift my thinking ends with me not saying anything because I stopped caring about it. Ok, "not caring" like that is obviously wrong. There's still the not caring like when I'm just talking about random stuff with a friend but if I knew how to do that with people I didn't know why would I have asked people how to do this in the first place?
    Next I try not caring by going up to someone I'm not interested in and asking about something I don't care about (which happened to be a phone they were rattling out some text on.) Well that worked in exactly the way it should have but is obviously still not the kind of thing I'm looking for.
    Then there have been a couple of times when I asked a general question and got a short answer then had no way to continue it. I'd ask girls something about themselves except that kind of lies on the hard to get to side of the wall that's in my way with this.

    I can't think of much more off the top of my head and I haven't exactly written these down in some kind of notebook or anything.

  10. #9
    Unknown Personality

    no I understand completely. I was the same way, I have no idea what switched inside of me. Just one day before i knew it I was like who are you? gtfo! and since then it's been sooo much easier. I think some people just naturally have this ability to realize that everyone is just as nervous as they are, or maybe some people are just born without the anxiety that goes with social interaction. I think the early years of child development has a lot to do with our social development as we get older.

  11. #10
    INTP - The Thinkers

    Ya, I definitely wasn't dealt a hand that you'd expect to lead to an extrovert there. Sister seems to have managed the extroversion instead, though she really set out to try and be a polar opposite.

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