What it really means to be a "feeler"

What it really means to be a "feeler"

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This is a discussion on What it really means to be a "feeler" within the Myers Briggs Forum forums, part of the Personality Type Forums category; So there are many stereotypes floating about when it comes to "feelers" - that they are (overly) sensitive, emotional and ...

  1. #1
    ENFJ - The Givers

    What it really means to be a "feeler"

    So there are many stereotypes floating about when it comes to "feelers" - that they are (overly) sensitive, emotional and even downright illogical. Yet more "official" descriptions I have seen say that having a feeling preference is actually about focusing on values, for example

    "The Feeling function looks at the values and relative merit of the issues. In order to make this kind of comparative analysis Feeling relies on having an understanding of the values of all involved. Whereas Thinking is more objective, Feeling is more subjective. The MBTI Manual (Myers, McCauley, Quenk and Hammer) quotes Jung “Feeling, like Thinking, is a rational function, since values in general are assigned according to the laws of reason.”

    All this makes me a bit confused about what it really means to have a preference for feeling. Is it as simple as listening to the heart more than the head, and is there really a connection between having a preference for feeling and being more emotional? What does your feeling (or thinking) preference mean to you?



  2. #2
    ESTP - The Doers

    I don't think it has to do with how emotional you are. There are Thinkers who have a lot of emotions, and there are probably Feelers who are not very emotional. I always thought it just referred to how you apply your emotions- feelers will make subjective decisions based on their values and feelings. Thinkers are objective and can look past their feelings to make the most logical decisions. I'm pretty sure that's the main difference, at least.

  3. #3

    I always test as an INFP and the description is fairly correct. However, I'm extremely logical and apathetic. I have strong values and a code of morality though, which apparently overrules my lack of feeling and logical nature. I only get feelings when I'm in a relationship. I do think subjectively but it's very logical/rational.
    chaosagogo and shakti thanked this post.

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  5. #4
    INTJ - The Scientists

    Hypothetical: you're a boss for a smallish business and you have to address some behavior concerns on the staff that are affecting the optimal running of the business. Knowing that implementing any kind of ground rules to curtail behavior (tightening lax requirements, cracking down on tardiness, lessening the budget for non-essential "fun" staff spending, etc.) will make the staff unhappy, but may be better for the business as a functioning entity in the long run, how do you approach the situation? What factors do you consider primarily in making your decision?
    shakti thanked this post.

  6. #5
    INFJ - The Protectors

    Quote Originally Posted by shakti View Post
    So there are many stereotypes floating about when it comes to "feelers" - that they are (overly) sensitive, emotional and even downright illogical. Yet more "official" descriptions I have seen say that having a feeling preference is actually about focusing on values
    Yes, feeling in the MBTI is about values, not emotion.

    Feeling is a judging function based on values. Extroverted feeling is about external and/or collective values, introverted feeling is an individual's own value matrix. For me, Fe-aux assigns default legitimacy to external value systems, and then that clashes with Ni (and/or Ni-Se) perception and Ti comes in to take it apart the Fe material for analysis.
    Vaka and shakti thanked this post.

  7. #6
    INTP - The Thinkers

    Quote Originally Posted by Aquarian View Post
    Yes, feeling in the MBTI is about values, not emotion.

    Feeling is a judging function based on values. Extroverted feeling is about external and/or collective values, introverted feeling is an individual's own value matrix. For me, Fe-aux assigns default legitimacy to external value systems, and then that clashes with Ni (and/or Ni-Se) perception and Ti comes in to take it apart the Fe material for analysis.
    And when we are called by someone to value emotion or the emotions of others...

    Haha.
    shakti thanked this post.

  8. #7
    Unknown

    Thinkers generally exclude their value systems in favor of examining "objective evidence" or "potential evidence" (Te and Ti respectively) to make decisions. Their value systems are usually directly impacted the same way, however: utilizing objective or potential evidence (obtained through experiences, research, and thought) helps to guide the Te or Ti user in identifying how and why their core values are important to them.

    Feelers generally favor their value systems over subjective or potential evidence, not because they ignore it, but because their value systems are already in place; the process of gleaning evidence has already occurred. Thus when decisions are made, the Fe or Fi user will make decisions objectively (how will this affect environmental values given the value system I have and understand) or subjectively (how will this affect my values given the value system I have and understand).

    While the thinkers tend to be more objective than the feelers, this has nothing at all to do with intelligence. (Nor are intuitives more intelligent than sensors.) The misconceptions often come with the NF and NT dichotomies, where both think "outside the box," but the NFs tend to see things "outside the box of physics, inside the box of human values." The NTs tend to ignore both the physics box and the human values box.
    shakti and Pogona Vitticeps thanked this post.

  9. #8

    l think a feeling function can be perfectly rational, but there is a still a distinction between rationality, subjectivity, and objectivity.

    Te and Ti are respectively objective and subjective and both seemingly rational functions. Fe is an objective function which people may consider to be irrational as a kneejerk analysis to its feeling status.

    l don't have much use for the SLOAN system, but l tend toward thinking that the misconception is equating feeling to a limbic type, which is not consistent between the two systems.

    Many thinking types can be limbic as well, though limbic feelers probably manifest as more typical and contribute toward what people think ''feeling'' is.

    The T/F dichotomy means very little to me currently. l'm probably balanced, but l do value being a calm SLOAN type and find l can at times become, somewhat stressed by limbic types of either persuasion.





    Not too much, just a little bit.

    But it's OK, never change.

    Just don't be mad, alright?

    Alright.

  10. #9
    Unknown

    This is a pretty informative article on the difference between a feeling and an emotion - Article

    Feelings:
    Emotions:
    Feelings tell us “how to live.” Emotions tell us what we “like” and “dislike.”
    Feelings state:”There is a right and wrong way to be. Emotions state:”There are good and bad actions.”
    Feelings state:“your emotions matter.” Emotions state:”The external world matters.”
    Feelings establish our long term attitude toward reality. Emotions establish our initial attitude toward reality.
    Feelings alert us to anticipated dangers and prepares us for action. Emotion alert us to immediate dangers and prepares us for action
    Feelings ensure long-term survival of self. (body and mind.) Emotions ensure immediate survival of self. (body and mind.)
    Feelings are Low-key but Sustainable. Emotions are Intense but Temporary.
    Happiness: is a feeling. Joy: is an emotion.
    Worry: is a feeling. Fear: is an emotion.
    Contentment: is a feeling. Enthusiasm: is an emotion.
    Bitterness: is a feeling. Anger: is an emotion.
    Love: is a feeling. Lust: is an emotion.
    Depression: is a feeling. Sadness: is an emotion.

    It says that emotions are shorter lived than feelings, feelings spawn from the repetition of emotions which helps give us a guide or way to live life(feeling). Feelings are the product of emotions but are longer lived and more stable.

    Feeling means 'gut feeling' which is different from being upset which is the emotion. It is a reasoning process, a way of analysing the situation from an interpersonal standpoint rather than an impersonal one.
    shakti thanked this post.

  11. #10
    INTP - The Thinkers

    I always thought of introverted judging functions as being subjective(Ti and Fi) and extroverted ones being objective (Fe and Te).
    shakti and Aquarian thanked this post.


     
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