INFJ females having issues relating to other females

INFJ females having issues relating to other females

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This is a discussion on INFJ females having issues relating to other females within the Myers Briggs Forum forums, part of the Personality Type Forums category; Hi, I'm new. I'm a very preceptive/intuitive INFJ but I have always found men much easier to understand. Women confuse ...

  1. #1
    INFJ - The Protectors

    INFJ females having issues relating to other females

    Hi, I'm new.

    I'm a very preceptive/intuitive INFJ but I have always found men much easier to understand. Women confuse and frustrate me to the point where I have trouble maintaining friendships with them. I'm always the odd one out in a group of girls or I at least feel this way. Do any other INFJs have this issue? Why does this happen? No matter how nice a female is I always see the bad side of them and can't get passed it.
    Bast, Hekate, icecream and 6 others thanked this post.

  2. #2
    INFJ - The Protectors

    Well, even as a male INFJ I have issues making friends or maintaining friends. They have to "click" with me, or I don't really feel comfortable.

  3. #3
    INTJ - The Scientists

    I agree with you, though I'm INTJ. Growing up, all my friends were male. If I had female friends, they were the girlfriends of my male friends. It's mostly because I was never interested in the same things they were. I consider myself independent, I didn't mind getting sweaty, being smart, if I have a problem I'd say it, and I didn't mind leading. Most of the girls I grew up with were always looking to date, didn't lift a finger in gym, pretended to be dumb, back stabbed, and never took the lead.

    I'm not sure if you're experience was close to mine, but I think it's a cultural thing. A lot of these girls parents were stay at home mothers that were part of some fancy neighborhood or book club. Where I went to school, for the most part, you didn't see mothers making all the money, it was almost always the fathers. Yet, I was raised in a family where both my parents worked and they had a very strong work ethic. They never bothered me to do homework or any such thing because they knew I would just do it for my sake. I grew up with a very different mind set to my female peers.

    Now that I'm in college, I pretty much only have female friends. All my male friends just want to sleep with me and I've met a good group of girls that have grown out of the stereotypical female mind set. They still have their moments where I just have to suck it up and be a good friend.
    Donovan, Zdorobot, Bast and 2 others thanked this post.

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  5. #4
    INFJ - The Protectors

    i always found myself lost when it came to having female friends. they all just seemed to be unintelligent and got on my nerves. i was and still am better friends with men. they are so much easier to read.

  6. #5
    INFJ - The Protectors

    IVE ALWAYS HAD THIS PROBLEM. i just cant get other females. same with always being the odd one. and as for seeing the bad side, SAME. and thats the part that bothers me most. i dont do it to men as much, but in women i can just see the bad more than the good. i just cant get passed it once i catch on to it. i have no answers as to why we are cursed with these things, but i thought you would like to know that someone else is in the same boat.
    Sheisstellar thanked this post.

  7. #6
    ENTJ - The Executives

    This is the story of my life.
    googoodoll thanked this post.

  8. #7
    INFJ - The Protectors

    I don't think it has something to do with being INFJ ... I know several girls that are not INFJ who feel the same way.

    But for me it has something to do with the people whether I can connect or not, and I think it's about 50:50 boys and girls... There are types of males I can connect pretty easy and I can read them without problems and connect well, but I'd say still most of males are a single mistery to me, like I cannot look in their minds. Whereas, the same goes with females, there are types that connect well to me, but with most of them I don't, still I wouldn't call it mystery.

    If I'd be asked, I would nevertheless tend to say I can connect easier with females in general. Though I might say it's easier to establish a friendship with a male.

    PS: Oh, and I grew up with my mother earning all money and my father staying at home. I don't think is has anything to do with that, though my sister is much more the male-friends-only type ... but she's definitely not INFJ, I think she's ISTP.
    StElmosDream thanked this post.

  9. #8
    INFJ - The Protectors

    I have the same problem but as a man. I can talk to guys but I prefer talking to ladies, which can be a problem as women always think I'm trying it on or I'm gay which is worse.

    I think that infj girls get on together rather well. As the INFJ ladies are a tad on the rare side it is normal to find you have little in common with others of the same gender. I only tend to get on with ENTP blokes or other INFj males in parallel to your problem so maybe a look in that direction may be fruitful.
    StElmosDream thanked this post.

  10. #9

    my girlfriend (INFJ) has talked about this as well...

    from a male's point of view, i really don't have a preference one way of the other--we're either worth each other's time or we're not.

  11. #10
    INFP - The Idealists

    There is also the possibility that you aren't INFJ.

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