Examples of really really really indescribably good writing

Examples of really really really indescribably good writing

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This is a discussion on Examples of really really really indescribably good writing within the NF's Temperament Forum- The Dreamers forums, part of the Keirsey Temperament Forums category; ...

  1. #1

    Examples of really really really indescribably good writing

    I’m sorry, the title is my attempt at humor.
    Actually let’s roll with it. I could use a interesting, amusing literature thread.

    Please post examples of the worst lines. The confusing, the over-reaching, the pathetic. Give me your tired, your poor, your huddled sentences yearning to breathe free.
    Take excerpts from terrible books that actually got published (I especially like horrible romances). Give full credit to the authors.

    If you correct papers give us the funniest grammar mistakes (no names on those, please).
    Whatcha’ got lying around? Seen anything silly?
    Last edited by Llyralen; 08-14-2019 at 12:16 AM.
    Sour Roses, Helendleof Loc and Samari thanked this post.

  2. #2

    Let’s eat kids!

    Rachael Ray finds inspiration in cooking her family and her dog.

    Note: Punctuation is important.

  3. #3

    Obligatory My Immortal mention

    I couldn't possibly try and pick any specific excerpts, the whole thing is perfect.
    blehBLEH and Samari thanked this post.

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  5. #4

    @Pizzafari . Sooo many hartz. “I am a vampire, I am also a witch. I go to Hogwarts and I love Hot Topic. I buy all my clothes from there.” Oh gosh this made me happy....
    I knew the INFPs would shine on this one! Thank you!
    I can’t wait to read the whole thing!
    Helendleof Loc thanked this post.

  6. #5

    Quote Originally Posted by Llyralen View Post
    Pizzafari. Sooo many hartz. “I am a vampire, I am also a witch. I go to Hogwarts and I love Hot Topic. I buy all my clothes from there.” Oh gosh this made me happy....
    I knew the INFPs would shine on this one! Thank you!
    I can’t wait to read the whole thing!
    It's legendary. There's also a dramatisation of it on YouTube if you're interested


  7. #6
  8. #7

    I feel like my writing is pretty horrible so it belongs here.

    A sprawling kingdom spanned across an entire half of a planet.. At it's center stood a timeless castle built into the largest mountain of Zeppod, the kingdom of the Skeel, where lived the Skellingtons, as the humans called them.

    King Urgo had been the undisputed ruler for who knows how long.. what am I talking about.. they didn't have a sense of time back then..

    He had raised numerous children.. building them from the bones of the defeated human warriors that invaded their lands.

    There were fewer female Skeel for this reason, and they were generally considered weak and cowardly in comparison to the strong boned, sturdy male Skeel.

    If they ever saw battle, it was as bonesmiths, the healers of their people, or as destruction mages.

    Everyone aside from the king was a prince or princess in those days.. The king's favoritism was all that it took to decide who lived where and who did what.

    Their planet was a cylinder shape, hollowed out by the dwasha, or dwarves as the humans called them..

    The gravitational field was strong enough to suck in other planets into an awkward spiralized dance. Several of the planets gave off colored lights, and the Skellingtons LOVED to bask in the red glow of planet Zweeba.

    The Skeel had no short young except for the rare dwasha boned Skeel, who were exceptionally rare due to the uneasy alliance with the Dwarven kingdom of Sevril.

    Being long lived, they mostly only had younger or older human boned Skeel.

    Their common language was Rancor, but the elite class had a language called Tu.

    Their poor lived in tiny sparse huts made of human leather.

    They had no reason to eat, but they liked to try to anyways as a regular running joke.. They even had taverns where the Skeel could go to blow off some steam. Small comedy clubs and bard troupes gathered there to play their instruments and tell stories of accomplished Skeel knights.

    Their temples were important to them.. and in their beliefs they found themselves united, with little argument.. They worshipped death and relished nightmares.

    Their flag was black and red, with a grimacing Skell head motif.

    Despite the kingdom's morbid and terrifying beauty, their people were largely unsatisfied with the witless ancient king. Assassination attempts had increased more and more, but the King's power seemed limitless..

    His people thought him weak in his unwillingness to push further into human territory.

    King Urgo had many beloved sons and daughters that lived in the castle and the surrounding areas. They were built from the best bones, trained from death in their predetermined careers.

    Could you imagine their currency? Why yes, it actually WAS human bones.. until they became scarce from the lack of wars against their human prey.. Afterwards, they collected shiny things they found or traded with the dwasha.

    It didn't matter much what shiny things, but it was widely agreed that the more shiny, the happier they felt.

    Many brave adventurers lurked the human lands, unearthing old bones in graveyards, hunting the humans as they slept, but the humans were not exactly defenseless...

    The humans possessed life magick, which turned Skellingtons into ash with a single upturn of their lips.. It sprung from the human passions for life and living.. and the liveliest of humans could make a brave and ancient skellington warrior weep and turn tail.

    Anyways.. one dreadful day, something unforeseen happened..

    King Urgo was assassinated by an unknown opponent. All that was left of the king were his ashes, his robes, and his crown of shininess.

    The kingdom was in an uproar.. he had been so calm and confident and powerful, he had not even thought to choose an heir..

    This was totally unheard of.. the kingdom became divided, and skirmishes broke out anywhere and everywhere.

    but there was one thing that everyone in the kingdom knew for sure.. The king had been murdered by a human life mage.

    Indeed, panic had set in for the citizens of Zeppod..

  9. #8

    50 shades of grey
    Last edited by contradictionary; 08-15-2019 at 05:40 AM.

  10. #9

    My partner bought me the kindle version of a book called Yeti in the Mist. It was a romance about a woman who fell into love with a Yeti. Even though it was cheap, I was so irritated he tarnished my kindle with the book that I made him read it aloud to me every night until we got through it.

    Very entertaining with a healthy dose of humour.
    Sour Roses and Lady of Clockwork thanked this post.

  11. #10

    Quote Originally Posted by brightflashes View Post
    Even though it was cheap, I was so irritated he tarnished my kindle with the book

    Yeah, you know Amazons AI Alexa keeps a vast store of data on every person... years from now, you will still be in searchable archives somewhere classified along with the tentacle-lover people

    Not to mention now Amazon is going to keep suggesting similar books to you.

    I'm not telling about the books I've looked at on there for humors sake
    Some of them... oh my gosh, I can't even. Whoever invented that genre?
    brightflashes thanked this post.

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