Personality Cafe banner

1 - 20 of 26 Posts

·
Registered
Joined
·
56 Posts
Discussion Starter #1
Are there any 1's that have difficulty not smiling at people, such as family members, friends, etc.? Is there any connection between smiling and enneagram to begin with?

I'm asking because I'm always smiling when I interact with people I know, and I don't know how accurate my tritype is yet.
 

·
Banned
Joined
·
4,477 Posts
Are there any 1's that have difficulty not smiling at people, such as family members, friends, etc.? Is there any connection between smiling and enneagram to begin with?
Are you speaking in general or specifying instances when I act certain ways? I may smile when I am trying to exude a sense of kindness in certain situations, maybe introducing myself or helping others. When focused on a goal most may not even get eye contact out of me because I'm focused on what is going on, much less a friendly gesture.

Generally speaking, I often seem lost in thought or in a slightly discomforted, on-edge task oriented mode.


I'm asking because I'm always smiling when I interact with people I know, and I don't know how accurate my tritype is yet.
1s aren't known to be all that similar. 1s see problems with things happening in the world around them, 7s look on the bright side of the situation. 1s won't always be grumpy for that reason, but we're known to be frustrated often. 7s are known for optimism and smile more often than most.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
56 Posts
Discussion Starter #3
Hard to say whether I mean specific situations or just in general. When I'm picked up from somewhere, if I walk towards someone I know, or if I want to say something to someone, I always get this huge smile on my face that I can't do anything about it.

Now that I've thought about it some more, this happens immideately after I've dismissed all of my internal thoughts and have no pressing things to think about, and I do this zeroing out every time I'm with a person I'd like to interact with.

This could just be an introverted vs extroverted thing. When I'm alone, I think introverted stuff, when I interact with other people, I think of extroverted stuff. If I interact and haven't been able to get rid of my introverted thoughts because there's something I need to do with them, I won't start smiling simply because of the interaction itself.

Haa, this post is a mess, but I don't have time to fix it and I probably wouldn't type it again if I redid this later on. o_O
 

·
Banned
Joined
·
4,477 Posts
Hard to say whether I mean specific situations or just in general. When I'm picked up from somewhere, if I walk towards someone I know, or if I want to say something to someone, I always get this huge smile on my face that I can't do anything about it.

Now that I've thought about it some more, this happens immideately after I've dismissed all of my internal thoughts and have no pressing things to think about, and I do this zeroing out every time I'm with a person I'd like to interact with.

This could just be an introverted vs extroverted thing. When I'm alone, I think introverted stuff, when I interact with other people, I think of extroverted stuff. If I interact and haven't been able to get rid of my introverted thoughts because there's something I need to do with them, I won't start smiling simply because of the interaction itself.

Haa, this post is a mess, but I don't have time to fix it and I probably wouldn't type it again if I redid this later on. o_O
So basically, you feel good about the outside world but must get past inner conflict to act on these feelings about the outside world. I would say that I prefer dealing with issues on the inside and reluctantly embrace the outside world. I would rather study it or work in it, though I find a few people that I grow close and sociable with.

I'm not a type 1 who considers myself to be people-oriented though. I think other type 1s, particularly the INFJ 1s would be able to give you a more similar answer to your own regarding views on interaction with people.
 

·
Premium Member
Joined
·
6,856 Posts
I smile at people a lot.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
89 Posts
I am a smiling fanatic. Not sure what it is, but it's there. Even when I'm frustrated or angry, I usually will smile very easily. When I'm in uplifting company, I smile easily. Now if I'm stressed, or angry about company I have to entertain (see: family), I tend to smile less often. I don't really think this has anything to do with the Enneagram, though: When one is in good company, they smile, and if in poor company, they smile less.

HOWEVER;
I have been told by several people at work that I always have a "shit" look on my face. I always look grumpy or something. That I think might be attributed to being a One, because, as Wake suggested, Ones can be very goal-oriented and thus get lost in the problems/solutions type of deal. And we're very serious a lot of the time.
 

·
Banned
Joined
·
4,477 Posts
I am a smiling fanatic. Not sure what it is, but it's there. Even when I'm frustrated or angry, I usually will smile very easily. When I'm in uplifting company, I smile easily. Now if I'm stressed, or angry about company I have to entertain (see: family), I tend to smile less often. I don't really think this has anything to do with the Enneagram, though: When one is in good company, they smile, and if in poor company, they smile less.

HOWEVER;
I have been told by several people at work that I always have a "shit" look on my face. I always look grumpy or something. That I think might be attributed to being a One, because, as Wake suggested, Ones can be very goal-oriented and thus get lost in the problems/solutions type of deal. And we're very serious a lot of the time.
How do you view relationships? What were you like during your high school years? Sociable? How much? Where did you fit in in terms of social groups?
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
89 Posts
How do you view relationships? What were you like during your high school years? Sociable? How much? Where did you fit in in terms of social groups?
Relationships?
Not sure if you mean romantically or relationships with others in general, but I can answer it the same way: Connection. Relationships are all about connecting with other souls (hopefully through a lot of conversation) for a predetermined span of time until they're no longer useful. By "predetermined" I mean predetermined by the powers that be, and by "no longer useful" I don't necessarily mean tiring of others, just that again, the "powers that be" decided that the person is no longer useful in your life because you've learned all the lessons they bring, etc.

In high school, I had a few (2-3) close friends. I could socialize well with others, usually kind people like E2s. However, I spent a lot of time with "the guys". Most of my friends were guys; I actually had very few girlfriends because girls didn't seem to like me, or turned against me easily. The guys that were my friends were mostly ex's or mustering the courage to ask me out. A lot of people also had a strong aversion to me....perhaps it was my "Hey, this life thing? Yeah, you're doing it wrong," attitude around my peers.

A lot of people, both in school and after graduation, seemed to find me intimidating. I have had a few friends say that, when they met me, they were intimidated by me or that I seemed really unapproachable. Probably that typical One "I'm going to criticize your choices!" vibe. :)

I guess I just suck at life. :p
 
  • Like
Reactions: Wake

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,545 Posts
I have a cheerful disposition along with my usual calm attitude (generally speaking). Also, I do not talk that much in general so what mostly people see is the smile.

I am a type 1/preference functions coincide with INFJ
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
594 Posts
Interesting.

I like to smile (people told me they couldn't BELIEVE I was going to join the Armed Forces, because I'm always laughing).

However, I've also been told that I give off bad vibes when I meet people.

I wonder why's that.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
89 Posts
Interesting.

I like to smile (people told me they couldn't BELIEVE I was going to join the Armed Forces, because I'm always laughing).

However, I've also been told that I give off bad vibes when I meet people.

I wonder why's that.
I've also heard quite a bit that I just "give off a bad vibe".

Any other Type 1's experience this?
 
  • Like
Reactions: ENTJam

·
Banned
Joined
·
4,477 Posts
I've also heard quite a bit that I just "give off a bad vibe".

Any other Type 1's experience this?
I never ask. I figure most people don't think that I think very much of them at first, but after first impressions I try to show a good nature. I'm slow to warm up to people. I think most understand I'm a workaholic and pretty serious.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
594 Posts
I never ask. I figure most people don't think that I think very much of them at first, but after first impressions I try to show a good nature. I'm slow to warm up to people. I think most understand I'm a workaholic and pretty serious.
and @akmcarpenoctem

Yeah, I've also been told I don't seem to be really caring at first but, once they "get to know me", they say I'm "a pretty cool guy".

This long delay, however, has prevented many friendships to be formed. As a result, I see myself as a gentleman of few friends.

Is there a way to be warmer towards people?
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,545 Posts
and @akmcarpenoctem

Yeah, I've also been told I don't seem to be really caring at first but, once they "get to know me", they say I'm "a pretty cool guy".

This long delay, however, has prevented many friendships to be formed. As a result, I see myself as a gentleman of few friends.

Is there a way to be warmer towards people?
I used to have the same issue; I noticed something between the reaction I get from people/the vibe I project and my attitude. If I am in a negative mood or really busy thinking then I seem really closed off to people and as 1s we are always on the go, we are doers. Yet, if I am in a positive mood and around people part of my focus goes to them so they approach me, even sometimes they start to talk to me without any effort of my own and tell me things about their life.

I do not really know how much this can be generalized to other 1s.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
594 Posts
I do not really know how much this can be generalized to other 1s.
Well, pretty much all my social interactions I must start.

I wonder what about me makes me "unnaproachable" or gives a "bad vibe". I guarantee is nothing physical such as smell and bad breath (there is nothing beyond these two that I can think off could get people away) - it's definitely personality-related. I'm just an average Joe. I wonder what's up.
 

·
Registered
Joined
·
1,545 Posts
Well, pretty much all my social interactions I must start.

I wonder what about me makes me "unnaproachable" or gives a "bad vibe". I guarantee is nothing physical such as smell and bad breath (there is nothing beyond these two that I can think off could get people away) - it's definitely personality-related. I'm just an average Joe. I wonder what's up.
It is possible the way the personality presents itself to others and how they react to it could be the reason. This has to do more with how people perceive you or what you do. If it is nothing visible, then sometimes unconscious behaviors can be exhibited by us which we are not aware of that could lead to this.

Maybe you can get info about this if you ask people you know about details of what exactly caused them not to approach you at first.
 
1 - 20 of 26 Posts
Top