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Hey everyone
I hope you can help me out a bit by giving me your INTP perspective on things as I am seriously confused. I'm an INFP female (20) and have fallen really hard for this guy (32) and I can't tell if:
A) I'm picking up on cues that don't really exist just from obsessing so much
B) there are some cues but they're so vague because he's an intp. Ive read from many forums that its basically impossible to tell. Is this true?
C) whether he's just being nice or if there's some interest

We work together and he honestly seems very socially mature. He's friendly to everyone and seems nowhere near as awkward as my INTP brothers. I honestly probably will ask if he wants to hang out someday soon, I just don't want to risk making our professional relationship really awkward so here are the things I've noticed. I can't really say whether he treats me differently than anyone else.

One day I asked him if he wanted to have lunch break together at work and he reacted really weirdly by saying "today?" and it honestly felt like he was leaning towards No. Anyway we had lunch together and there was so much eye contact and he was facing me quite intently. It seemed like the conversation was quite good (mostly revolving around him because I asked most of the questions) but twice he started talking to other coworkers briefly.

Anyway he handed me a paper card with a list of the band/artists he listens to. I had briefly asked him one time and he gave me one or two musicians but i had forgotten about it. I thought this quite sweet. He also remembered what genres i prefer.

After the lunch I told him to let me know if he wants to have lunch again and he said he'd let me know. Didn't hear anything the next day, he had lunch with his friends. Later the same day though he invited me to sit with him and his friends next time, that he didnt want to invite me because i was sitting with someone else. He did stutter a bit when he invited me.

I wrote him a card of music recommendations and he listened to some already and told me about one he liked. He didnt throw it in the trash so i guess that's good :p

When we pass each other he usually says hey or brings up a short convo. If he catches me looking at him (whoops:p) he'll nod.

On the first day we met he complimented my name so I complimented his and he seemed happy to meet me. I complimented him agaiin since then. In the beginning when i tried going up to him hed cut the convo quite short. One time he even avoided me i think. :'( I have never seen him do this with anyone else.

One time a few coworkers and I went to a bar right next to work, including him. We didnt talk much but i noticed he looked at me quite curiously when i talked excitedly with his female friend about books and travel.

Why is this guy so damn weird? I mean thats part of my attraction to him (hes really different and he genuinely intrigues me) but i also appreciate straightforwardness.

So what are your opinions? What should i do? How can i approach this?

Thanks in advance for reading and responding!
 
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