Personality Cafe banner

1 - 2 of 2 Posts

1,741 Posts
Discussion Starter · #1 ·
Personal concepts
1. What is beauty? What is love?

Um, that's hard to define, so much is! October is beautiful - with the colorful trees and the smell of fallen leaves and fog, that is making everything milky. I love picking up chestnuts too, and just running them in my fingers. Beauty is pleasure to the senses. It's the setting sun, coloring the storm clouds gold from underneath. It's contrast, and bright yellow and blue side by side. It's full lips, or a sheer cheekbone, or broad and defined shoulders. It's brown eyes with the devil inside them. It's fresh snow, that twinkles whitely. Everything visual, that makes you feel content looking at it, perceiving it, and not having to think. Just letting it all in without consequence.
Love is, when another person makes you smile, just for existing. When you feel eager to get out of bed in the morning, just because you know, that at some point, you will see him. But it's also, what I feel, when I know one of my sisters married and is now really happy, and the other is in a relationship, where her boyfriend is taking good care of her. I am happy for both of them, and relieved, that someone is taking good care of them and loves them how they deserve to be loved, and enjoys their quirkiness and uniqueness, and treasures them for what they have that is different, and loves about them even the temper, even when they are cranky when hungry, or when they have a passion for what they believe.
Love is also, when my partner at the time, who has a phobia of feet and finds all, including his own disgusting offers to help me with my socks in the morning, because I had a back injury and struggled to reach. I could do it, but it hurt, so he offered to put them on for me. It's not pretty, but it is the most romantic thing someone has ever done for me.

2. What are your most important values?

I value compassion. It's not the same as empathy, because you don't have to understand exactly what the other person is feeling, or why, you just have to show mercy and kindness, and not judge. Be kind.

3. Do you have any sort of spiritual/religious beliefs, and why do you hold (or don't) those beliefs in the first place?
Generally, I am a pragmatic person, very down to earth first and foremost. However, once in a while, I get philosophical moments, or am so down in life, that I need a belief to hold on to, to get me out of bed in the morning, and to exist until things get better again. I've experimented with religion, coming out of a Catholic country, hanging out with Muslims for a couple years in my life, because my friends and colleagues were. I'd call myself agnostic, because I struggle to be limited by religious dogma and am too open-minded and questioning for comfort, but I am close to Buddhist philosophy, and believe in karma. I try to do by others how I want to be done by, and I am naturally compassionate, and in my dark moments, when I think nasty of the world, I try and get back to that. So probably Buddhist philosophy without the religion.

4. Opinion on war and militaries? What is power to you?

5. What have you had long conversations about? What are your interests? Why?

I'm jack of all trades, so anything goes, as long as both parties have at least basic knowledge of the subject. However, I am from an activist family, so a lot of my discussions have rotated around xenophobia, and breaking down others' prejudices, or about what steps lead to dictatorships and wars. Most people don't realize that past tragedies didn't occur just like "Tadaaaaa, let's kill and ethnic group for fun!" but were a gradual process, triggered by a community stressor, and that it takes several years. I'm big on evaluating people as individuals.
Other than that, I love to talk about American football. I play it, and I watch it, and I have strong opinions sometimes, and like to discuss with people who have the same passion for it. I also adore trash talk of all sorts!
I'll also talk about pets, and their behavior habits, about psychology, which is a longterm interest, and about relationships, because I've always been the 'no bullshit Aunt Agony' for people around me. I love them, but I'll call them out on things that they are doing to their relationship, and how they'd like it if they were on the receiving end of their behavior.

6. Interested in health/medicine as a conversation topic? Are you focused on your body?

Yup, very much so. I have a good understanding and perception of what is happening with me, and can tell illnesses before symptoms, just by how the smell changes. I can tell both about myself, or others, if they are getting a flu in the next few days. Same with cold. I play sports, so I have to have a good feel for my body, and understand when something hurts and it's fine, and when it hurts and it's an injury. Especially because I play contact sports all my life. I've been a sickly kid, and I've gone through quite a couple scares in my life, so I've done a lot of internet research:laughing: But I get better as I get older. And yes, I'll talk about health with people extensively, and about medicine and swap experiences and tips.

7. What do you think of daily chores?

Don't be rude! What chores are daily? Is shower and washing teeth a chore? I do that. Otherwise, I struggle with discipline doing chores at home. When I lived with my mom and sisters, I was the one bringing most income home, so I had a bit of mama-hotel, where I didn't participate in chores. Now I live alone, and I tend to keep the house clean for quite a while, if it is already clean, but after a certain threshhold I tend to neglect it, until I get disgusted, and then I spend the weekend sorting it all out, making it beautiful and clean all at once. Then I maintain it for a while, and repeat again.

8. Books or films you liked? Recently read/watched or otherwise. Examples welcome.

I am a big fan of adventure books and films. My ultimate favorite director is Quentin Tarantino, because of the aesthetics, the story, and the dialogues. He is a genius! Pulp Fiction, Reservoir Dogs, and Hateful 8 would be my top I think. But I've also enjoyed Deathproof. I can enjoy homage to B movies and revel in the details.
As for books, my most abused authors are Stephen King and Terry Pratchett. I like the creepy books, that have adventures. From Stephen King, it's mainly those with child heros and groups, so It was a big one for me, and I loved Talisman and Black House. From Terry Pratchett, it's Discworld novels, namely his witches, Death, and night watch series. Not a big fan of the wizards one though, never completed any of those. Oh, and a book that left a major impression on me was Of Mice and Men, by John Steinback. Damn, I cried a river!
Otherwise, graphic novels, and their series adaptations. Love Preacher, and watch the Walking Dead. Enjoy Marvel movies.

9. What has made you cry? What has made you smile? Why?

I'm an easy crier, privately. I cried when I found out, that I will have to move out of the flat I am living in. I cried when I felt lonely and misunderstood. Generally, loneliness makes me cry. I smile at a lot of things. Including just seeing something beautiful, whether it's smoke coming out of a chimney, or a tit (the bird) strutting around. I like little pretty things happening. Or when I smell something that I like, like baking cookies, or October leaves on the ground, or spring things blooming. But I also smile at people, and displays of sweet behavior, or when I see people courting. And I LOVE when people acknowledge my successes and give me praise. That makes me smile a lot!

10. Where do you feel: at one with the environment/a sense of belonging?

Where? Probably in nature, the wild kind. Or when I'm petting my cat, face burried into her furr and she's purring. Or when in an embrace. That's probably the strongest, but unfortunately most rare as well. Also, on the football field, after I've made a tackle, in the defensive huddle, when we know we're doing our best, and there is adrenaline coursing through our vains, and it's a common goal and excitement bonding us.

Evaluation & Behaviour
11. What have people seen as your weaknesses? What do you dislike about yourself?

My randomness and inattention. I get distracted easily and I don't have discipline. I'm more a play before work kind of person than the other way around. And yes, lack of discipline is what I dislike about myself too.

12. What have people seen as your strengths? What do you like about yourself?

They like my compassion and being open minded, as well as my sarcastic sense of humor, and being able to make funny impressions of people and situations (not in a nasty kind of way, more like endearing). I can have a physical sense of humor in the right kind of situations. I like about myself, that I'm good at hearing people out, and a catalyst for them, to process what they have to. I also like that I DO have a sense of humor.

13. In what areas of your life would you like help?

I would like a house cleaner. I suck at that. And I'd like someone to listen to me sometimes, and hear me out, instead of using me as a soundboard for all their woes. I need help organizing, and keeping discipline, someone to be in charge of the budget, so that I don't get what I want instead of what I need.

14. Ever feel stuck in a rut? If yes, describe the causes and your reaction to it.

Yup, often. I work a 9-5 job from Monday to Friday, sat on my ass, and detest that. However, it's a job that pays and the people are nice. There are things that I have to do regularly, and zillions of obligations that I have, and that means I have no time, energy, or money for adventures. I want more adventures and exhilirating experiences in my life!

People & Interactions
15. What qualities do you most like and dislike in other people? What types do you get along with?

I like a sense of humor, open-mindedness, and being active in other people. I get along with pretty much anyone, except those that are too judgemental, or love conflict (I'm conflict avoidant).

16. How do you feel about romance/sex? What qualities do you want in a partner?

Who doesn't love both! There can be sex without romance and be great. But there cannot be romance without a desire for sex with the person. Physical is super important. For someone to be partner potential, not a friend potential, physical attraction is alpha and omega. But beyond that, I need to have shared values with the person. My values are quite stable, and my own, so I won't change them for convenience or change of settings. So we need to be aligned in this from the get-go. Sense of humor, and finding me funny too. Intelligence, and being open-minded. Someone, who keeps learning. I also like competent men, confident, and good at what they do. I think I have a soft spot for judgers and introverts.

17. If you were to raise a child, what would be your main concerns, what measures would you take, and why?

I think I would be the 'friend' kind of parent. My main concerns would be that my child is happy, but also self-sufficient, and considerate to others. I would want my child to feel that home and family is safety, but at the same time, to be resilient and able to weather what life throws at him/her. It would probably be most difficult to keep the balance of that - to be both trusted and protecting, but also to raise a decent human being, that is able to take care of themselves. I'd talk to them about anything. I would address their curiosity, like my parents did with me. I would promote critical thinking, and give them opportunities to make decisions of their own, where possible, and learn to be accountable. It would make them both responsible, but also empowered, and give them trust in being able to change their situation, and not have the 'victim of circumstances' mentality.

18. A friend makes a claim that clashes with your current beliefs. What is your inward and outward reaction?

Depends on how much. I very rarely get into heated conflict, but generally, I would try and discuss it with them. Hear their side of the story. But also give them perspective. Internally, depending on what it is, I would probably be disappointed, or even hurt, that a person who I thought is a friend doesn't share this important connection with me.

19. Describe your relationship to society. How do you see people as a whole? What do you consider a prevalent social problem? Name one.
I'm an individualist, and do things my way. I'll hear others out, but generally keep my own counsel. Despite that, I am an extrovert, and need people and interactions and adventures in my life to be happy and energized. However, because I am the way I am, and because I come from an unconventional family and have unconventional upbringing for where I am, I've always been on the border. I take part, and I have people around me, but at the same time, I feel like I am alone, and not part of. I don't like sheep mentality, and people just accepting truths from a politica figure they admire, or the one news source they watch. I hate that so many are unable of critical thinking. What I like about where I live is the open-mindedness of most people on most things. What I like about the US is the mentality of giving back. The idea that 'if I'm doing well, I'll help out someone, who is down on their luck' is pleasing to me. I've been on both ends of that spectrum, so I can properly appreciate that.
The social problem I despise most is xenophobia and racism.

20. How do you choose your friends and how do you behave around them?

Generally, they chose me. I don't know why. Some people like me, so they'll text and call and want to hang out. It's often not the same as those that I would most prefer. My favorite people are those, that have curious minds and like to discuss various topics, and are hungry for knowledge. But not too abstract. For me, real-life applicable things over concepts any day, and twice on a Sunday! I like people, who are action driven, and would be happy to join for bowling, billiard, walks, adventures, experiences, dinners, bobsledging, or whatever. Conversation is cool, shared activity is cooler! And I like those that are practical and have a sense of humor.

21. How do you behave around strangers?

I'm generally friendly, and will make attempt to make conversation, if relevant, but if there isn't an icebreaker moment, I won't push it. My first instinct is warm, but if the person is weird and pushes my limits, either being flirting in a too pushy way, or sharing some hateful ideas, I become quickly very aloof and dismissing.

1,741 Posts
Discussion Starter · #2 ·
Yeah, I'm not so sure anybody is here to read these. But my knowledge of socionics is too limited, so helping myself will take way longer than even typing these answers up.
1 - 2 of 2 Posts